2009 Graduates.

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I figured that what with this time of year being when most schools have their graduation ceremonies, I'd give my congratulations to the graduates, and a hope for good luck in your path.

My Speech to the Graduates, 2009
by TC


Thank you, parents, distinguished faculty members, and students of Notorious B.I.G. University. I'm truly honored that you've asked me to make the commencement address to this year's graduating class...

Long uncomfortable pause. The speaker looks disgusted. He looks around with a contemptuous smirk on his face, crumples up his notes, and then shoots them into the audience, making a three-pointer into the pronounced cleavage of Miss Weatherby, the shocked glee club director who's sitting in the front row.

Screw this. I was going to make some high-falutin' speech about achievement and bright promise and all the wonderful opportunities in your life, but let's get real. Most of you are sitting out there Twittering and Tweeting and texting and OMG'ing and it's doubtful you'd even hear one word, so I'll just go ahead and say what I feel like.

Gawd, where do I start? I guess I'm going to address only the males out there because they're far worse off than you ladies. You, I'm not worried about too much. All the same, you're welcome to listen in.

Hrrrum (clearing throat).


Good afternoon losers...........

You can finish the rest here..... 2009 Graduates

This is vital information. Read it, or lose!

-Dev

[edit on 3-6-2009 by DevolutionEvolvd]

reply to post by DevolutionEvolvd


And if that disheartened any of you, well, good. Get it out of your system.

Life sucks. Get used to it. Part of your life after high school will be spent in a job that sucks.

That's life.

However, knowing that and moving past it is part of life. Family, friends, a solid job, point's not to be incredibly successful, point is to reach the point where, at the very least, you can live comfortably.