I have finally found my place to tell this dream...with full support and understanding

"Why would I choose a beautiful, spring, Friday night to start this is beyond me, but I have wanted to share this experience for some time now. I do need to give a little background before I start even though it is tedious. I will be brief.

When I was seven years old my father died suddenly. He came home feeling poorly and within one week was gone. It was determined that he died from widespread gangrene in his system due to blood clots that had formed and settled in his lower intestines. He was unconscious within 24 hours and never knew what hit him past being rushed by ambulance to the hospital. His 30th birthday was three days before he died. I was daddy's little girl and never really got to say goodbye, and to this day still have weepy times, especially in the spring and summer. I believe this is because he died in August, but I do think of him a lot during other times of the year too. I don't dwell on this as an adult, but it is always a part of me.

In July of 2006 I had a very lucid dream of him. I know, and believe, he came to me. I have had many dreans of my dad but this one was different. I know. I have studied dream work for a long time, especially during my senior yr in college when I had the great fortune of working with a professor who was very immersed in the Jungian theories of analysis.

I was in a white room. It was as though it was a room in a cloud, where I was sitting at a table, cutting up vegetables. I was aware of a few other people, but not too much. I looked up unexpectedly and my daddy was standing there, in a long white robe smiling and looking at me. All of a sudden we were alone in the room.

I dropped what I was doing and just said 'daddy?'...the room was real, the feeling of joy was real, and it was as if he had come back to life looking just the same as before he died. But he was beautiful, radiant, and head-to-toe in shining white just like the rest of the surroundings. He came to me as if gliding, not walking, and got down on his knees before me. I never said another word to him after my initial reaction and he never said anything to me. But then he reached up and wrapped his arms around my middle, and laid his head on my chest. He held me very tightly, but gently, and all the while I could feel this wonderful warmth enveloping my whole body.It was all over me like the most beautiful thing I have ever felt.

We stayed that way for a long time it seemed but in a dream visitation it is hard to tell. Then, he looked up into my eyes as if to talk but nothing came out except this feeling I had that it was "ok', he was still here for me and came to say something...I don't know what it was, but there was no need for words. But I didn't want him to go and leave me again...please don't leave and end this moment! you are here...what are you trying to tell me?!

He then was in a long line, floating out of a door of some sort, all the while watching me and smiling with calming blue eyes...but my dad had brown eyes.

In an instant, all too soon, it was over and I woke up with tears on my pillow and cried for the next three days. But, the most wonderful thing that happened was that I actually FELT the warmth from his hug the whole time, like an electric blanket, for days afterwards.

I finally reached my old college prof. We talked for some time and I cried my eyes out. He had a lot of wisdom, caring, and insights to help me through this turmoil. I had no where else to go considering a serious dream experience isn't something to be belittled or broadcasted to just anyone.

My prof. said the most likely thing that had happened was that my dad had came to me as an adult to offer comfort, and for me to watch what would happen in the following weeks/months because a lot of times this happens when one's life is about to change, or something is going to happen.

He also said that the reason we didn't talk to one another was because there was no need; we spoke through emotions and feelings. I think this is the reason for the long warm hug; it said way more than words could ever accomplish. I was truly shook for a long time.

I'm going to end this part now and start again since I'm not sure how much I can post at once. This is a huge therapy for me so far.

Ok, so this is my ending to this dream story and the following circumstances.

One month after this dream a dear friend of ours died, also unexpectedly. He was only 49 yrs old. He was a huge part of our life as a good friend and the cause of death was never established for sure. His last hours were a nightmare.

He had blue eyes.

The next year my mother-in-law passed away after my husband and I took care of her during the dying process, which took about 4-6 weeks.

She had blue eyes.

I used to work in the restaurant business. A woman's group came in to have a "girl's day out" for lunch. One of them happened to be a psychic. I offered her my hand and she told me "you will be facing, this fall, situations where you will be losing someone/people. Do not look at this as a negative but something that needs to happen as a part of life. Do not be afraid or sad, but you need to make room for the new changes in your life that will be coming" She was very focused and intense while reading/holding my hand, and it felt like I was going through the whole dream about my dad again.

In summary, I am sure this experience was very real and helps to prove that your dreams not only are real but that they are often a vehicle for very important visitations from loved ones.

I haven't been able to share this with anyone. I always start to cry or get too afraid of the ridicule that might follow. MY husband knows a little of this but I couldn't even share it with him completely. My mother can't handle it emotionally and thinks I am too far "out there" so I haven't told her either.

I know for sure that my dad came to me that night. If I could have you all feel and see what I did you would believe in the powere of dreams, and how they can help to warn of things to come. But I also think in this scenario my dad came to me because he wanted me to know that he was alright and loved me, and wanted us to connect again.

I was told by my prof. that once I could get calmed down I should try to reach him again through positive feelings and hopefully the fact that I was so shook up won't keep him away. I have tried a few times since then but without any success.

What will be will be!

I want to thank you for listening and apologize for anything left unsaid or unexplained. I do feel better but a little exposed as well. This truly was an altering experience, one I will never forget. I'm too tired to go any further, but hope this all made sense.

thank you so much,
FMF