The Power Of The "R" Word, page 1
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ATS Members have flagged this thread 6 times
Topic started on 22-5-2009 @ 10:50 AM by ImaginaryReality1984


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 11:23 AM by ImaginaryReality1984
Originally posted by riley
You seem to be disagreeing with yourself here. Small percentage yet many women? The "many" is a baseless assertion. I am glad they are prosecuting fake claims but they are not the reason rape victims do not come forward or get accused of being liars. I also find the title of this thread extremily offensive as it implies that any woman who claims rape might possibly be on some sort of power trip.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by riley]


Firstly i am not disagreeing with myself, nearly all of my friends are female and this post comes shortly after a conversation where they were all very frank about knowing the power of that word. One even called it a trump card. They all said they would never use it, but if pushed i wonder.

When i said few women actually use it i was being serious, few do. These are the ones who use it at the drop of a hat just because they're annoyed, check the video of the cab driver to see this exact situation.

If what i posted offended you then sorry, but as a man i find this entire thing very scary. I hope you will see it from that point of view. On top of all of that i again point out that these false claims are damaging the legal system because people consider all rape cases in this light.

I am not claiming that every women is on a power trip when they make a rape claim, i am however, with proof in the articles saying that it can, and does happen. I am saying that the word rape, does havea power that blinds people and has made a mess of the lives of many men. That is empirical data, not my opinino, it has happened and continues to do so when it turns out it was a false claim.


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 11:27 AM by LucidDreamer85
Originally posted by riley
I know this is only a small percentage of women doing this, but i think when pushed many women know the power of this little word.


You seem to be disagreeing with yourself here. Small percentage yet many women? The "many" is a baseless assertion. I am glad they are prosecuting fake claims but they are not the reason rape victims do not come forward or get accused of being liars. I also find the title of this thread extremily offensive as it implies that any woman who claims rape might possibly be on some sort of power trip.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by riley]



No it claims that some women might be on a power trip.


I never personally had to go through this but at one point my senior year of high school a girl I had sex with claimed , how should i put this, that I " could not get it up" when she knows damn well we went at it for a good 30 min.

I had to basically call her out on it on front of other people, and she tried to deny she said it and then everybody saw she was lying about it and she admitted " I shouldn't have said that"..

But I garauntee some girls still thought I had a " getting it up " problem.

She basically said this because her best friend hates me ( she hates a lot of people), and started talking shat about me in front of some others guys.


The only reason I know she said this was because my best friend was hanging out with her at the time and these other guys so he told me what was said.

I had to embarrassingly explain to my friends that I just didn't finish ( got tired after like 30 min ) and then explained how she made that up...


Some girls/ women make up little lies to make themselves look better in front of people they either don't know or they do know and want to impress.



Not exactly the same as a false rape claim but Still it hits your ego pretty hard at 18 years old to have to defend yourself like that.



These things happen more often then people think.


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 11:32 AM by ImaginaryReality1984
To add another article, in 2001 the police were so concerned with false claims they started looking for ways to help determine whether people were lying or not

www.guardian.co.uk...

Other stories


www.dailymail.co.uk...

www.kentonline.co.uk...


I would say that many people will fer discussing this topic, because doing so makes them immediately suspect and that in itself is very telling of the power of this word.



[edit on 22-5-2009 by ImaginaryReality1984]


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 11:42 AM by Mudman21
I am going to have to agree a little on this one. I have seen two instances in my life so far where a female was doing something voluntarily and then recanted and said they were forced.

The first instance was at a park, and a girl that some of us new was there as she lived near by and came up and decided to show off her upper assets. We didn't ask her to do it, she came up to us and said, "hey, you guy's want to see my boobs?". We said "hell yeah" and just as soon as she lifted her shirt, a parent walked over, and called the police. Just as soon as the police got there, the girl immediately started telling the police we forced her to do it. It took hours of one on one interviews to convince the police we were innocent since all of our stories collaborated and the police decided we were too young to be able to collaborate our story that well and that quickly. If we would have been adults, we would have probably been taken straight to jail and had to get lawyers and fight a rape charge!

The second instance was at a college party. Long story short on this one, girl gets drunk, has sex with my buddy, two days later police are at door to arrest buddy for rape. In the end it was all dropped but what happened was, the girls friend saw my buddy and her go back to the bedroom and decided her friend was drunk and convinced the girl that she had no control of the situation and that she was raped. The girl went to the campus police and pressed charges. The girl finally decided that she was coherant and dropped the charges. But this just shows you how easy it is to scream "rape" in a situation. Not to mention my friend had to sit in jail for 24 hrs. for nothing.


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 11:54 AM by riley
Originally posted by ImaginaryReality1984
Firstly i am not disagreeing with myself, nearly all of my friends are female and this post comes shortly after a conversation where they were all very frank about knowing the power of that word. One even called it a trump card. They all said they would never use it, but if pushed i wonder.

I'm not sure what class of people you hang around with but I have not heared it being abused in such a way.
When i said few women actually use it i was being serious, few do. These are the ones who use it at the drop of a hat just because they're annoyed, check the video of the cab driver to see this exact situation.

You said MANY women when pushed know the power of the word. You obviously have a low opinion of women in general if you think "many" women see it as some sort of potential weapon.
If what i posted offended you then sorry, but as a man i find this entire thing very scary.

As do women and girls who either have been raped or fear being raped.

..or fear being branded a liar in the event they are faced with having to make a report to police.
I hope you will see it from that point of view. On top of all of that i again point out that these false claims are damaging the legal system because people consider all rape cases in this light.

Sorry to break it to you but people already saw rape cases in that light. The instant a man is accused the woman is accused of being a slut/and or a liar. Going to police would not be an easy thing to do.
I am not claiming that every women is on a power trip when they make a rape claim,

Just "many"..
i am however, with proof in the articles saying that it can, and does happen.

Of course it does.. very rarely. Innocent people get sent to prison for assaults, thefts and murders as well. I think it's less than 10% of rapes end in conviction so it's fairly likely innocent men are in prison for reasons other than false rape claims. Should anyone who reports something stolen be presumed to be a liar then? Insurence fraud happens all the time yet these do not.
I am saying that the word rape, does havea power that blinds people and has made a mess of the lives of many men. That is empirical data, not my opinino, it has happened and continues to do so when it turns out it was a false claim.

..and what about all those women who have report real rapes yet are assumed to be sluts or liars? Their charactors can be detroyed as well.. and thats even when they are found to be telling the truth. The certainly of having your name get dragged through the mud and having your sexual history exposed publically does not sound like much of a "trump card" to me.

Again.. while this does happen it doesn't happen often enough to start presuming most rape claims might be fake.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by riley]


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 12:09 PM by double_frick
reply to post by ImaginaryReality1984



RAPE!!!

no srsly though, this is incredibly offensive and WRONG.
may you never incarnate as a woman...


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 12:15 PM by ImaginaryReality1984
Originally posted by riley
I'm not sure what class of people you hang around with but I have not heared it being abused in such a way.


I hang round wwith a perfectly nice group of people, this was just a conversation we fell into. They did not say they would use it, just they knew how powerful it was. I would appreciate it if you didn't insult my friends.


Originally posted by riley
You said MANY women when pushed know the power of the word. You obviously have a low opinion of women in general if you think "many" women see it as some sort of potential weapon.


As miost of my friends are women, no i don't have a low opinion of women and the fact you cannot see past such assumptions pretty much proves the point. The R word has such power that even this topic, when backed by evidence cannot be discussed without accusations flying around. I said most women know the power, society hears rape and instantly thinks the man involved is an evil piece of scum. I have seen it in the papers where the guy is accused, the comments on the websites are all for hanging him, then when his innocene is proven the people still think he's guilty. That is the power of that word.


Originally posted by riley
As do women and girls who either have been raped or fear raped.


Raped women find false accusations scary? Ones that have been proven false? Or you mean the idea that they may possibly be lying is scary? That is what the law is btw, it is neutral, it has to consider all sides and maybe if the R word didn't have so much power innocent men woudln't have gone to prison. Are you saying we should instantly side with the woman even if some innocent men go to prison?

Lets be clear, rape is a terrible thing and in my humble view the minimum sentences should be raised to life for a predatory rape.


Originally posted by riley
Sorry to break it to you but people already saw rape cases in that light. The instant a man is accused the woman is accused of being a slut/and or a liar. Going to police would not be an easy thing to do.


What an absolute load of nonsense. Many rapes go unreported i absolutely grant you that one, but it is in the mind of the women only that they think these things. Society wouldn't brand them as such it is just rape victims tend to blaim themselves. That is actually one of the tests mentioned in the article i linked about detecting real rapes, victims tend to think it's their own fault.

People do NOT see rape cases as women lying, that is quite the opposite of what the public thinks. If what you say here is true then men wouldn't be falsly imprisoned.



Originally posted by riley

Just "many"..


Well done on quote mining. I said many know the power, not many use it. Try and calm down and look at this thread again without the obvious emotion that is leading your arguments.

Originally posted by riley
Of course it does.. very rarely. Innocent people get sent to prison for assaults, thefts and murders as well. I think it's less than 10% of rapes end in conviction so it's fairly likely innocent men are in prison for reasons other than false rape claims. Should anyone who reports something stolen be presumed to be a liar then? Insurence fraud happens all the time yet these do not.


Again you sadly miss the point because you are to emotional about this one. When faced with other offences the police and juries approach it will an equal mind. If i claim someone tried to assault me i better have good proof, the person will be questioned but it will likely end in the complaint being dropped without evidence. However when a rape allegation is made the police will descend upon it with the wrath of god, if proven innocent the man will struggle for many years to recover from the reputation damage.


Originally posted by riley
..and what about all those women who have report real rapes yet are assumed to be sluts or liars? Their charactors can be detroyed as well.. and thats even when they are found to be telling the truth. The certainly of having your name get dragged through the mud and having your sexual history exposed publically does not sound like much of a "trump card" to me.


That is down to the public to decide. It's hard to comment here unless you want to bring up a particular case. If you do i'd happily go through it, although i'd prefer another thread as to not derail the points made here. Your choice of course.

What i would say if that if a women is raped, regardless of sexual history it is still rape.

Originally posted by riley

Again.. while this does happen it doesn't happen often enough to start presuming most rape claims might be fake.


See i'm sorry but you are again going with your emotion here. I have NOT said anyone should presume anything. I have said that when rape allegations are made people presume the worst, they are immediately on side with the woman. That is what needs to change, that is all i said. We need a fair look, not a biased one either way.

Remember that whole, innocent until proven guilty thing?



reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 12:16 PM by ImaginaryReality1984
Originally posted by double_frick
reply to
post by ImaginaryReality1984



RAPE!!!

no srsly though, this is incredibly offensive and WRONG.
may you never incarnate as a woman...


Yes because discussing abuses of justice is wrong.


Oh i should point out that i have known two people who have been raped, one of which happens to agree with me on this topic, the other i know longer know. But i guess that isn't important huh.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by ImaginaryReality1984]


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 12:46 PM by riley
Originally posted by LucidDreamer85
Riley this thread seems to have struck a nerve with you. I could assume somebody you know might have went through something like this.

You know what they say about assumptions. I think it's a bit tacky for you to be speculating on my personal experiences. Should I not be entitled to just express passionate opinions without having to explain what has formed them? It is not relevent.
Nobody is saying that most rape victims are liars and sluts. You used those words.

Actually he said "many" which means he basically was saying that.
We are saying that this is something men have to deal with and worry about.

We all have our crosses to bare.. but I do not think many innocent men have been sent to prison for rape so I think this media reaction is not warrented.. or at least should be reported with respect to the actual statistics.
You never think a girl could stoop that low to lie and risk your life just for her ego and reputation but they do it.

And if it's not false rape claims then it is instances that i posted above which can also cause havic.

erm.. you told a story about a (high school) girl claiming you couldn't get it up. You also said "not quite a false rape claim". No it's not.. comparing the two is not an argument. Men do not get sent to prison for being falsely accused of impotence. It's a mean thing to say but not comparable.

..and we all know some men have said they've slept with women they haven't slept with. Perhaps those women should be able to have them charged too?
You make great points and i commend you for it but you are acting very defensive when nobody here is trying to offend you.

I have seen this more and more in the media and I am seeing possible rape victims gets crucified by the media. The end result? Even less rape victims will come forward.. of course I am going to speak out when I see sterotypical myths being formed.
Your opinion however is welcome and creates balance in this topic.

thanks..
Just understand though that we are not women bashing, simply stating instances which have effected some of us personally or people we know.


And yes a 19 year old dating a 15 year old qualifies that guy as a Douche bag creepo at the least.

This is a case in point. Every time I see these "false rape" stories people inevitably start talking about 14,15,16 year olds seducing grown men and then the woman bashing starts. Lets be honest here.. you/the OP etc can claim this is an innocent topic but it is already being used to demonise girls who've been (techincally) victims of stat rape. So whats the agenda? Is it against the minority of rape accused that get convicted or is it against the underaged girls who seduce men and send them to prison? Eye on the ball.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by riley]


reply posted on 22-5-2009 @ 12:54 PM by ImaginaryReality1984
Originally posted by riley
This is a case in point. Every time I see these "false rape" stories people inevitably start talking about 14,15,16 year olds seducing grown men and then the woman bashing starts. Lets be honest here.. you/the OP etc can claim this is an innocent topic but it is already being used to demonise girls who've been (techincally) victims of stat rape. So whats the agenda? Is it against the minority of rape accused that get convicted or is it against the underaged girls who seduce men and send them to prison? Eye on the ball.



This is utterly disgusting, you are twisting the motives of this thread rather horrbily. You are trying to deflect arguments by doing this. The agenda or i should say motive because agenda has rather ominous tones (which is why you used that word) is simply to state that men don't get a fair trial with these kinds of cases. Further more they don't even get fair treatment in custody with accusations of rape and furthermore they don't get fair treatment in society even when they are found innocent because of the power of the R word.

As for stat rape i would say this, each case needs to be assessed on it's merits, as with any breech of the law. How about this one, a friend of a frien was in a night club, slept with a girl. Now this is an 18's and over nightclub. He then spent a year or more fighting a legal battle because the girl was actually 15 and had lied and said she was 18. That is technically stat rape. So what should happen there? Should he be imprisoned for years because he didn't ask for ID?

However this thread wasn't about that, you have brought it up, this thread was about how men are badly treated in rape cases, unfairly seen by juries and how men have to be quite fearful of such an accusation ever being thrown their way.

[edit on 22-5-2009 by ImaginaryReality1984]
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