How To Weather The Storm?, page

I started this as not to derail a thread already posted by another member.

It came up in his post that there has been an increase in the number of men losing their jobs while women are losing their jobs at a much slower rate.

There are a lot of obvious reasons why this is happening and at some point this trend may change but right now many women that I know are being impacted by their husbands being out of work while they continue to work.

For many of them they took jobs just to bring in some extra income so that they could have more of the luxuries that life had to offer and to help contribute to their retirement.

Now with their husbands not working and the larger portion of their family income missing they have had to make drastic changes in the way that they live.

Not being shy about stepping up to the plate when the need arises many of these women are not complaining as much as you would think but their husbands are not as optimistic and it is causing a burden on their relationships and the marriage.

It is not easy for some men to accept their wives as the primary financial supporter of their home. Some of these men have started taking their frustrations and anger out on their wives and children. And I am willing to admit that there are some women out there that are behaving badly as well.

These are transitional times and things may be tough for a while so let’s think of some ways that families that are affected by this can weather the storm.


Thread that started this conversation"
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reply to post by NightSkyeB4Dawn

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I think it can be really difficult for us guys to swallow our pride sometimes. My wife recently lost her job and I've had the same one for nine years. I'm the senior guy on my staff, the director and get paid the most. I'm a little worried.

Resentments are the killer. I've found the only way to avoid them is good, honest communication. Unfulfilled and unrealistic expectations are a pain in the butt too and will ruin things if you don't get them out in the open. Sometimes you just have to hear yourself say something out loud to realize how silly it is.

I'm a guy. Communication is not my strong point. I expect my wife to be able to read my mind. She can't. So I have to make an effort.

I know that personally I will get wrapped up in worrying about the safety of my family, the bread on the table, the world situation, the job, etc. and sometimes be a silent jerk for a couple days. She knows me well enough that she will poke and prod until we get the conversation going. Once we've talked about it, things aren't so bad.

We take turns being the one that says 'no matter what, we will be ok.' We both need reassurance sometimes that the other is in it for the long haul and not going to bail when it gets too tough.

The 'Storm' as I would interpret it is just the crazy crap, all the material things, the bills, the worries. As long as your partner knows that you are absolutley committed to them and will do anything you can to make it, WITH THEM, then everything else matters a lot less. It's all just stuff and can dissappear in the blink of an eye.

It's sad, but I know a lot of couples won't make it together through this, but 'this' is not much different thananything else. Communication, selflessness, compassion, duty, faith....the basic necessities from a long, long time ago, are still what's needed today.

I may be a hopeless romantic, but i truly believe that love can weather ANY storm, if it's really love.

reply to post by KSPigpen

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I think that you and your wife are on the right track.

We have become too wrapped up in the material. That stuff us is nothing but future landfill.

Maybe you are a romantic, but love, compassion and a new focus on the things that really count is a good foundation and a great place to start.

Keeping the romance and throwing out the junk (including the ego) puts you way ahead of the game.

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