How futile is replying to a post you disagree with?

You know when you see a post you disagree with, the more it means to you the heavier the urge to reply?

Well, lately I've crossed some kind of border.. When I really disagree with a post, and it's something like how the universe is supposed to work or any kind of "I have the truth" post, I don't even try anymore. What's the use of disagreeing with someone when the only thing you're doing is posting your opinion? If there's a fundamental difference between the opinions, isn't it useless to try to convince the other?

What are the chances of someone changing their frame of reference just because they read your post?

Honestly I don't want those questions answered but I'm struggling with what to do here.
Do I lower my standards when reading other's posts, try to become less of a critical thinker? That feels like cognitive treachery. And I don't think it's possible either..
Do I stop posting when I disagree? I'd have to avoid reading posts I disagree with, otherwise I'd have to find some way to cope with disagreeing with heaps of posts without saying a thing.. The latter isn't realistic, so basically it would strip me from the chance to be open minded, or to open other's minds.. I guess..

I think you guys have all been through the same stuff and was wondering how you deal with it. I'm sure you guys are more mature about this than me.. I'm mentally stubborned

Hey, where did my anger go.. Oh well.
Now, share your coping methods! Whether you disagree with me, or not! ;D

reply to post by scraze


I disagree scraze.

To present your point of view,your opinion, or your other evidence contrary
to what has been presented is one of the greatest aspects of what ATS is.

The motto "Deny Ignorance" is held close to many here.

My perception is that by offering even just an opinion,I not only convince myself to open my mind, but also prevent myself from being veiled from the true reality in which we live.

I do not need to agree.

Debate
Explore
Enlighten

More often than not such lines of discourse tend to end in outright arguments, and we all know how those tend to end up:

img.roonk.de...

If you can find one thing the other person has said that you can agree with, mention that as well.

Or acknowledge that they have put their case very well, even though you cannot agree on all the points raised.

Or just post whatever you want to say without directing it at any other member in particular. If they then disagree with you - see above.

If you can't convince them of your point of view, thank them for an interesting discussion.

Then tootle off to do something else, secure in the knowledge that you're right and they are wrong, wrong, wrong

At the end of the day, it's not really important if we agree or not. What is important is that we took the time to have an exchange and through the conversing of view points, hopefully the two sides can walk away having learned something. Our opinions may have stayed put, but at least we took the time to challenge them and see if our view points could stand pat through such an exchange.

In the past, I went into threads dead against a certain topic. By the end of it, I had pulled a 180. Not because I was weak in my position or that I gave in, but sometimes a bit of information is presented that we were not aware of. And ultimately we came to our previous conclusion from a place of ignorance as we were uninformed of the truth. And through our exchange, ignorance was denied.

So I think it is absolutely crucial that we take the time to engage those that we disagree with. As without that exchange, we're all left twiddling our thumbs and patting one another on the back through gratuitous praise.


...no thanks.

Wouldn't it be terrible if those around us with the power to switch on a light or open a door just watched from the wings and left others to bump into things.

Sometimes we all need to deal with confrontation of some sort or another just to offer up new perspectives to ourselves.

If I disagree with someone's post why shouldn't I say something? Not futile at all if the other person goes away with something they can use.

Of course, what they do with it is up to them.

Cheers..

If there's a fundamental difference between the opinions, isn't it useless to try to convince the other?

What are the chances of someone changing their frame of reference just because they read your post?

No, it isn't useless. In fact, wise posters will encourage it.
We learn nothing from those who agree with our opinions.... Only when we truly listen to those with a dissenting view, do we actually learn new information....

Personally, I've had the good fortune to have many fine members disagree with me on occassion, and provide sound arguments and even support for their conclusions. In same cases I've changed my mind...in others, I've at least learned to consider the possibility. (I've probably applauded those who disagree with me far more often then I've done for those who agree...)

Open discussion and debate is hopefully, one of the many reasons we're here. Now, that doesn't mean a bar brawl, but hopefully a polite, if sometimes heated discussion, without the playground antics of namecalling and character attacks...

reply to post by scraze


One of the best parts of a debate is to use facts and other information to prove points and show the ideas written have merit. That is also why I play Devil's Advocate sometimes. The ideas are interesting, but they may need some back-up and other evidence.

As the others have stated the idea is to deny ignorance. It also helps to be tactful when disagreeing and to not resort to name calling.

I get into spirited debates in the UFO forums when I disagree with a case. They can get heated, and I do call the persons out who refer to me as a disinformation agent or a debunker.

Ahh, let me wallow in the communication of the wisdom of communication for a second..

Right. Thanks for the replies guys, although I've realised most of the things mentioned at some point, it's always somewhat difficult to see it clearly when I'm ticked off. Lot of your suggestions are great to try to calm down without compromising the content of a reply, have to remember those ;]

I feel I have to add that I don't experience those problems normally, I enjoy denying ignorance through intelligent conversation as much as the next ATS'er really.. This thread is dedicated to those posts which distort that enjoyment. Heh.

By the way, although your answers convinced me to try harder to construct a worthy reply, I found this today:

Attention all,

If you feel the need to scoff at, make fun of, or ridicule a member because he made a post or started a thread that you don't agree with, or that you think is stupid, crazy, too out there or ridiculous. Do not post anything.

No more scoffing and ridicule... by TheBandit

Now, I shouldn't have a problem with this if I were a nice guy.. I try to be, really, but somehow my posts can have a ridiculing(?) tone.. even though I'm consciously trying to avoid it. I'm tempted to try the 'zen' way of replying, but am scared I might 'drop the ball' and end up violating the T&C.

I think I'll have to refrain from posting 'extreme' replies till I find a way to eliminate all feelings that could lead to a ridiculing tone - of which the most important feeling is frustration. As long as I don't get frustrated in the process, I should be fine.

Just post what's on your mind, and try not to name-call. If you step out of line, you'll get a warning or have a post removed. No biggie. It's just the Internet. :-)

I get where you're coming from, though. Trying to change people's minds on a message board is like trying to divert a locomotive by throwing tomatoes at it. Keep this in mind, though: Other people are going to read their post, and then yours. People whose minds might not be made up yet. It's for the sake of those readers that you post your opinions, not the person you're responding to.

It's not futile. Just because they may not change their minds doesn't mean that you can't change your mind or they won't change their minds. It's quite important to respond to dissenting posts. How would you like to be in a world where no one disagreed with you?

reply to post by scraze


some people might take what you're saying as harsh. Sometimes it's not what you say it's how you say it.