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Random Acts of Chaos to Mess with Archaeologists and Conspiracy Theorists

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posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 12:49 PM
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Ever get bored?

Here is a list of some ideas of things you can do to have fun and in the process toy with future Archaeologists and Conspiracy Theorists.

1.) Find a remote cave in the U.S. and paint a vignette from the Papyrus of Ani (Book of the Dead) on the wall. For added effect, get a few inexpensive Egyptian Artifacts dating to 1500 b.c.e like coins, Ushabti, scarabs, and scatter them about on the ground. Entomb a Cat Mummy from the same era there just for added affect and authenticity.

2.) Take an ancient text and translate it into disparate, unconnected languages and write them on a piece of clay to produce a "Rosetta Stone". Ancient Sumerian, Greek, Cherokee, and Klingon would be a nice combination.

3.) Write a vague prophecy, in the style of the Revelation of John. Write it in Aramaic on a Parchment Scroll and seal it with wax in a homemade Jar of Clay. Deposit the Clay Jar in a mountain cave.

4.) Make your own Alien Fetuses out of Sculpee and suspend them in liquid with green food dye in a Laboratory Specimen Jar. After making a couple dozen, place them on a Storage Rack in an abandoned warehouse and film them. Upload the video to YouTube.

5.) Make a Map of peculiar geographical locations in your local area. Make notations of them, giving them unusual names or having brief descriptions of paranormal explanations (i.e., like Valley of the Unicorn, Sacrificial Stone, Haunted Grove, Pyramid Rock, Woodbury Gate, etc). Upload an image to a website or leave it on the table in a cafe or at the bus-stop.

6.) Find a large stone and engrave Germanic Runes on it. Give it an inscription for some hero and add a date of 784 as if it were a marker or monument.

7.) Develop an undecipherable cipher, or triple encrypt something using 3 common cipers and write the encrypted text in a made up script. Write an entire book using this script. You could just copy something common, like a Cookbook or Romeo and Juliet. For added affect, change your cipher method every three pages. Donate the book anonymously to a Library.

8.) Make your own Shroud of Turin (there's an interesting method using Alchemical Agents and a Pinhole Camera). Obtain a Reliquary and place within it a toenail, a piece of wood, and various other objects typically found in the Reliquary of a Saint. Make up a name for your Saint and place them in a box with the name of the Saint on the outside. Mail it UPS to an Orthodox or Catholic Church using the return address of another Orthodox or Catholic Church.

9.) Make fetishes of an indigenous Amazonian Aboriginal Tribe and hang them from trees in a woods or forest near you.

10.) Design and Commission the creation of a monument. Have cryptic code engraved on it (Masonic style, like C.M.M.V. D.D. T.M.N.T., or capitalizing random letters in the inscription, or leaving words clearly misspelled). Alternately, you can take one tenet from random from 10 different historical Manifestos and have them inscribed on the monument like a Decalogue (10 Commandments). Manifestos from Groups who are the subject of Conspiracy Theories would work best for this (like the Illuminati, Skull & Bones, Priory of Sion, United Nations, et cetara).

Please forgive me if you find this post offensive in any way. I suppose it can be blamed on the fact that I've re-read Baudolino and Foucault's Pendulum this week, added to doing research on the Georgia Guidestones. That combination is bound to cause one to consider a myriad of shenanigans.




posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 12:55 PM
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Honestly, I find this to be one of the most immature, asinine threads I have ever seen on this board.

Congrats.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:15 PM
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Originally posted by cautiouslypessimisticHonestly, I find this to be one of the most immature, asinine threads I have ever seen on this board. Congrats.


Well, you are entirely welcome to your own opinion. I wouldn't think to deny you that.

However, any student of history or who has researched the root of many Conspiracies to their source, or has spent any time looking at anomalies in the field of Archaeology, or has understood the practice of counterfeit artifacts in Religious History would see a sardonic, satirical truth revealed in this post.

From the Calaveras Skull, the Etruscan terracotta warriors in the MET, the James Ossuary, Piltdown Man, the Tiara of Saitaphernes in the Louvre, the Glozel Tablets, the Shepton Mallet Chi Rho Amulet, the Voynich Manuscript penned by Roger Bacon, the Hua Hu Ching: The Unknown Teachings of Lao Tzu, the Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion, the Dossiers Secrets that spawned the whole Templar -> Priory of Sion -> Illuminati -> Bloodline of Christ -> DaVinci Code phenomenon, are all examples of elaborate hoaxes or forgeries that were done for no apparent reason to deceive.

(And that doesn't include the multitudes of hoaxes and forgeries that were done specifically to deceive for an ulterior purpose!)

If anything, one should walk away from this thread with either a laugh, or some sparked creativity, or a warning to be more scrutinizing and skeptical of all things. It's food for thought.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:18 PM
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Originally posted by cautiouslypessimistic
Honestly, I find this to be one of the most immature, asinine threads I have ever seen on this board.


I don't.

I hope somebody goes out and does stuff like this, just to screw with archaeologists.

Why? Because they shouldn't think so highly of themselves and their work in the first place. They have no idea what in the hell they're digging up at least half the time, or how it got there, they just dig it up and guess it out. There have been so many bizarre items recovered that don't fit conventional theory, that are just thrown out because no one understands them, it disgusts me.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:28 PM
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I found this thread quite entertaining actually. Props to the OP for coming up with the list.

Calling this slight levity "asinine " in a place where threads dealing with how Reptilian Aliens breed is..well......asinine and immature

:-)


[edit on 28-4-2009 by TXRabbit]



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:35 PM
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Starred and flagged OP, great work on this thread. Now I have something fun, entertaining and enlightening to do with my son this summer while he's off from school.

I love it!!!! Now I've got to find a cave on my property. If not, I'm sure my brother knows of some near his place.

Great ideas, fun stuff and entertaining to us who view it in proper light.

A_L



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:39 PM
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We need more Discordians like you, OP. Especially here on ATS, it's so boring lately. Bring in the funny.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:40 PM
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reply to post by cautiouslypessimistic
 


The OP required a fair amount of intelligence and knowlege to formulate such a list. I presume it would require an iota of same to appreciate it.

I, for one, enjoyed it. Thanks.

Levity can be a scarce commodity around these parts.

Some of us don't always "conform" to other's expectations.

When I was a kid and it was time to play Cowboys & Indians, I always chose to be an Indian. (Not only for the added benefit of running around in my underwear yelling, but because I always felt they were more in tune to nature.)

Great Thread.


Regards...KK



[edit on 28-4-2009 by kinda kurious]

[edit on 28-4-2009 by kinda kurious]



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:46 PM
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reply to post by kinda kurious
 


Thing is, I have no problem with random acts. I guess it makes me unintelligent to think it is foolish to try and INTENTIONALLY skew future generations ideas of history.

Its really no different that spreading disinfo.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:47 PM
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reply to post by cautiouslypessimistic
 


So are you just going to be another one of the victims of it, or are you going to actually do something about it?



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 01:57 PM
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reply to post by cautiouslypessimistic
 


You are so boring. Don't you think their ideas will be skewed anyway? Why NOT pretend we could fly and shoot lazers from our eyes? It'll just make them revere us more. It'll give them hope they could evolve to be like us, too.

Hmm, wonder if the Mayans were secretly Discordians?



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:01 PM
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This is a great idea, but here is food for thought, but what if Ancient people in the past thought of this and that is why there are conflicing information in some dig sites.

I once read somewhere by that if a furure generation where to dig up our remains and their technology was much different than ours, they might not even know what a toilet seat was, they might even think it was some decoration worn by chiefs of our tribes.
I can just picture the museaums of the future with statues wearing toilet seats around their necks and it makes me laugh.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:04 PM
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reply to post by fraterormus
 
I liked Terry Pratchett's ideas of terraforming advanced civilizations creating worlds with ready-made fossil records. They left cheap digital watches in the bellies of fossil dinosaurs to confuse later populations


It's not too far from reality as the Berlitz', Cremo's and Daniken's make claims of fossil sparkplugs, batteries and ancient nuclear Armageddons etc etc. Some people believe humans wouldn't know how to wipe our proverbial backsides if aliens and 'lost civilizations' hadn't shown us the difference between our behinds and a hole in the ground.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:06 PM
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Wow. I am so thoroughly disapointed in the members of this site....

Look at the top left of the screen, under the ATS logo. What does it say? "deny ignorance"
yet you all are here thinking it is hilarious and actually advocating the spreading of ignorance.

Bravo.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:08 PM
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reply to post by cautiouslypessimistic
 


No, it's the other way around. I have a point: archeology is already ignorant. By pounding this weakness and making it obvious, isn't someone going to fix it? Or are you going to cling to it and just hope nobody takes advantage of you? Science advances, sorry. Like I said, what are you going to do about it?



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:08 PM
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reply to post by cautiouslypessimistic
 


Oh grow up. Just because they think it's funny doesn't mean they'd do it. I would, but I don't need your boring approval. You are so grey faced it is ridiculous.

Anyway, if they came across a tape with Flinstones on it, that'd confuse them as much as anything we'd do.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:24 PM
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Originally posted by AlienCarnageI once read somewhere by that if a furure generation where to dig up our remains and their technology was much different than ours, they might not even know what a toilet seat was, they might even think it was some decoration worn by chiefs of our tribes.
I can just picture the museaums of the future with statues wearing toilet seats around their necks and it makes me laugh.


This is from the book Motel of the Mysteries by David MacCauly. In the book it is the year 4022; all of the ancient country of USA has been buried under many feet of detritus from a catastrophe that occurred back in 1985. Imagine, then, the excitement that Howard Carson, an amateur archeologist at best, experienced when in crossing the perimeter of an abandoned excavation site he felt the ground give way beneath him and found himself at the bottom of a shaft, which, judging from the DO NOT DISTURB sign hanging from an archaic doorknob, was clearly the entrance to a still-sealed burial chamber. Carson's incredible discoveries, including the remains of two bodies, one of then on a ceremonial bed facing an altar that appeared to be a means of communicating with the Gods and the other lying in a porcelain sarcophagus in the Inner Chamber, permitted him to piece together the whole fabric of that extraordinary civilization.

My aunt bought me this book when I was 10 years old and started showing interest in the field of Archeology. It has always lived with me as a powerful lesson that needs to be learned before one considers working in this field.



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:41 PM
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Originally posted by cautiouslypessimistic
Wow. I am so thoroughly disapointed in the members of this site....

Look at the top left of the screen, under the ATS logo. What does it say? "deny ignorance"
yet you all are here thinking it is hilarious and actually advocating the spreading of ignorance.

Bravo.


Actually, what the OP has done is show how easy it is to fabricate 'evidence', and thus raise our awareness so that we do not just jump upon such things as 'proof' of ancient aliens and civilisations but rather use our intelligence to deny ignorance and question the validity of such things.

Nice one



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:50 PM
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reply to post by fraterormus
 





This is from the book Motel of the Mysteries by David MacCauly.


I guess I either had this book at some time or another or borrowed it. I am 34 now, but I still love that scenario, and makes me think about differend discoveries in a different light each and every time, which is what it is supposed to do I suppose, still makes me laugh when I picture it in my head though . . . .

[edit on 4/28/2009 by AlienCarnage]



posted on Apr, 28 2009 @ 02:51 PM
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Originally posted by cautiouslypessimisticThing is, I have no problem with random acts. I guess it makes me unintelligent to think it is foolish to try and INTENTIONALLY skew future generations ideas of history. Its really no different that spreading disinfo.


It is natural human nature to place events in a readily-understandable, moral context. The need to explain the unexplainable is our modus operandi. This is the rationale behind all myths, legends, religion and conspiracies.

However, regardless of whether conspiracies exist or do not exist, they rarely move history; they make a difference at the margins from time to time, but with the unforeseen consequences of a logic outside the control of their authors: and this is what is wrong with 'conspiracy theory.' History is moved by the broad forces and large structures of human collectivities.

If one were wanting to affect History, towards one end or another, one would not do so with implementing a Conspiracy or by positing a Conspiracy Theory to expose a Conspiracy that may or may not exist. The effects on History would be marginal.

Therefore, if one truly wanted to make a lasting impact upon History, one would do so by attempting to move the broad forces and large structures of human collectivities. This is what Authors do.

Imagine the cultural impact that Shakespeare has had on the Western World. Are his books of literature based on truth? Of course not. They are fictitious accounts.

How about the Bible? Does it really matter if Moses climbed Mt. Sinai alone and was given the Torah/Decalogue/10 Commandments by God, Aliens or chiseled them himself to influence his people? The effect those tablets had on numerous cultures in both the Near East and the West for thousands of years is profound and wide-reaching and entirely undeniable (for better or for worse). They could have been divinely inscribed by the Hand of God itself, or they could have been divinely inspired, or more likely, they could have been a well-meaning hoax by Moses himself. It doesn't change or minimize the profound impact they have had on History.

What about the practice of authors to quote from non-existent fictitious literature? This is a literary device that has been used by Samuel Clemens (Mark Twain), Edgar Allen Poe, H.P. Lovecraft, and just about every Apocryphal writer since the dawn of time (Book of Jasher anyone?).

Heck, the fictitious hoax of the Necronomicon has struck more of a resonant chord in the Collective Consciousness of humanity than the Kennedy Assassination!

And let's not forget the Book of Mormon. So, Joseph Smith, a treasure hunter and con-man, looks into a hat and sees the Angel Moroni holding Golden Tablets written in an Angelic language that he can inexplicably read, and recites them to his assistant who writes them down. When his assistant's wife burns the transcription of one of the chapters, Joseph Smith is unable to recreate it. Still, the Book of Mormon has inspired a religion of 13 Million people to be tied with Judaism as the fifth largest religion worldwide!

And don't even get me started on Scientology that was started by a failed Sci-Fi author!

The intent or meaning of an object, relic, treatise, etc doesn't matter as much as the quest to explain the ojbect, relic, treatise, etc. What is important is the search to explain the unexplainable...to find meaning where there is no meaning intended. If you want something to influence society you make it obtuse, hidden, secret, or mysterious and let others find their own meanings to explain it, and in the process take ownership of those ideas and find relevance to their own time and place. When you do that, you influence History.

Don't blame me for Human Nature. However, can it be blamed that I would consider using Human Nature to create new myths, legends, and conspiracies to make History where there is none?



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