Anyone have experience with someone with Multiple Personality Disorder/Dissociative Identity Disorde

Hi. I want to know if any of you know or live with someone who suffers from this disorder. Someone very close to me (I'll call him Mr. X) was recently diagnosed with this (about 8 months ago) after going through a large number of different therapists and psychiatrists. He also took a variety of several anti-depressants which he says never really helped him.

He finally found a great psychiatrist who took him off the meds in order to start real intense therapy without the numbness of feelings created by the meds. Luckily, the psychiatrist is the same person who does his therapy.

After a few months in therapy, Mr. X started showing his different personalities in a more clear fashion, very scary at times, I must say, to see someone change so much in a matter of a few minutes. Sometimes to not even remember what any of his other "alters" had said.

Eventually, Mr. X seemed to be "remembering" stressful events in his life from early childhood, and although he has shared what he remembers with me, none of his childhood experiences are so bad (in my and other people's opinion) to have caused such a great trauma to have made him develop alternate personalities to cope with his life. Maybe he still does not remember something truly traumatic? Maybe he's still repressing the memory?
His therapist started trying hypnosis in some of their sessions together.

His numbness was replaced by an overwhelming wave of emotion (even before the hypnosis therapy). He became way too sensitive, had crying bouts, maybe 4-7 throughout the day, but I mean, full-blown sobbing. Enough to make his daily life non-functional, sometimes even having to leave his office because he couldn't stop crying. A few times he asked me to drive because he had to sob.

He started talking of killing himself, his psychiatrist increased his therapies from once a week to 2 or 3 a week. Just a few days ago, his psychiatrist finally put him back on a low dose of anti-depressants because his crying, apathy, pessimism and lethargy were getting out of control.

One of his alters has been a very angry person, with a huge chip on his shoulder, intolerant, but never ever agressive.
Other seems to be a child who keeps asking for someone to take care of him, his voice even becomes whiny.
And when it seem to be the real him, he's a great guy, A-type personality, top position in his company, used to be a highly functioning man who was keeping a bunch of personal demons hidden for years until now.

But, this is all wreaking havoc in my house. It is getting to be way too much for me to handle. He's now treating me like dirt, like he does not want me around, other times he clings to me and asks me not to let him fail....those alters are screwing with him big time.

The psychiatrist told me point blank that barely any marriage makes it through something as extreme and complicated as this. There is no cure for it, it can only be controlled but not in all cases, and a large percentage of patients who suffer from this end up being hospitalized for some time.

So, I would really like it if someone could share their experiences with me.

[edit on 4/27/2009 by haika]

Most professionals will tell you that you need to take care of yourself first. Caught in any kind of enabling behaviour to any of Mr. X's demons only adds roadblocks to his learning to deal with these splits. It can be done but life with them will never be easy.

Check out the movie "A Beautiful Mind" and you'll appreciate how John Nash managed to learn to live with the voices without giving them power. That requires a truely gifted mind.

reply to post by haika


I know someone that has been diagnosed with this

I'm always unsure exactly how I feel about this sort of diagnosis - because I'm not sure the experts are sure - if you know what I mean

she's a friend of mine - not an extremely close friend - but I know her well enough to have experienced some pretty severe mood changes - and if I were honest I guess you could call them shifts in personality - but I don't know where you draw the line in all of this

I don't know anything about anything on this subject, so, I don't know how much help I can be is what I'm saying

the only information I can give you that might be of any help is this -

she had an extremely traumatic childhood - and I mean it was extreme - I'm surprised she survived it

it was so traumatic,the only reason I even believe any of it is because she's the sister of a friend of mine - and she can corroborate the entire history (as she herself suffered through much of the same)

in any case, she has had a very hard life - full of trouble and misery

she's been addicted to heroin, a prostitute and spent some time in jail for attempting to murder her father

today she is a functional (I love that word), balanced, compassionate person

and a lot of fun

in addition to other things, she works with recovering addicts and helps to get women out of prostitution, off the streets and into homes and jobs

she still has her issues - but who doesn't?

it wasn't easy - and it didn't happen overnight - but you should know what's possible

I'm sure none of this is going to help you with your situation as it is right now - and as I mentioned - I don't understand enough about any of this to give you real advice

I just thought you should hear about someone else who survived and rose above it all



[edit on 4/27/2009 by Spiramirabilis]

Thanks a lot for your comments GriffinRD and Spirimirabilis.

This thing is so weird. When the psych. told us what the diagnosis was it sounded like we were in some bad science fiction movie. It was a very odd feeling. Like "he'll talk but it's not him, sometimes it is, but you won't know for certain, sometimes his voice will even change...etc."

In fact, X told me that he would've preferred to be diagnosed with cancer, that then it would at least be treatable, not some disease that isn't understood at all, up in the air, very vague.

Can't say I really knew this person very well, but a friend of my ex supposedly had about 13 different personalities.
I never witnessed her change into any of them that I know of, but my ex said she had met a few of the 'alters' to the effect that one which was apparently aware of a collective of sorts said 'we' approve of you(to my ex).

This woman was a very 'anti synthetic' type of person so I am not sure if she was on any meds. To the best of my knowledge, she and her husband(who was a very cool and talented guy) must have been dealing with it in their own kind of way.

Ultimately, the way I understood it, her parents had been in some kind of(satanic or otherwise) occult that sounded pretty hardcore because I really cannot repeat some of the ritualistic things that had been done to this woman, but in light of hearing about them, I could see how such trauma might cause a psychotic break(in her case, multiple due to the repeated rituals and the apparent need for coping with a range of issues).

I think it is rather difficult for a sane person to know what it is like to be insane. You can mimic the effect chemically, but who can say that it is the same effect at all, really?

Take blacking out/memory loss from drinking too much alcohol, for example...never happened to me, but I might be mean if I said people just use it as a get outta jail free card, so I have to believe the effect is real as foreign as the idea seems to my mind. There's a physiological explanation, CT scans showing changes that happen under controlled tests etc etc.
Sure, I forget stuff all the time, but not like that.
I have mood swings, but not like that.

Best of luck to you and Mr X.

I can see why it might seem like a bad science fiction movie

but you should think of it more like this - remembering that I'm not in any way an expert - but this is how my friend has explained it to me

as I understand it - as a survival mechanism, the brain compartmentalizes in response to trauma

it's a way to survive

we are all compartmentalized - but those compartments are better integrated in some than in others

when they aren't as well integrated, it can appear that they're separate personalities

this part is meaningless (it may all be meaningless) because it's just my opinion - but, I think we're all a conglomerate of different personalities that seem just like one when everything is working

I know that you've found a doctor that you seem to be comfortable with - but if you ever reach a point where you don't feel all that comfortable - forget about the hassle - it's worth it to get another opinion

I'm sure it all seems like a nightmare to you right now - I really hope your Mr. can arrive at the same point as my friend - she really is pretty happy these days

reply to post by haika


Hi there - I'm not sure what you're asking - if its real or if others have survived a family member with MPD? If it truly is MPD (which is a very real condition for some people), without a lot of time and a very patient (and good) doctor the personalities will likely remain splintered. Sometimes, depending on their dominant personality's attitude the personalities can re-integrate more or less.

What I have learned about this through studies and biographies is every case without exception results from extreme trauma and abuse as a child. The mind compartmentalizes itself to be able to shelter some of the personality from the horror, which is usually why there's a dominant personality that takes care of them.

Depending on the personalities, it can be genuinely dangerous to be around them. Sometimes one personality will attack another personality resulting in physical damage to themselves. In other instances it has been shown that while one personality will go to the bar and get drunk, when another personality takes over it isn't drunk at all - somehow the physical body responds to whoever is in control.

It's absolutely fascinating, but I can't imagine living with someone diagnosed with MPD as its never ending stress with "who are they now" and "who's coming next". It might be a safe place for treatment away from family 24/7 might help, might not. Every case is different. I can only offer consolences, for whatever makes someone's personality do this has had to go through extreme pain and abuse somewhere. Because they haven't talked about it yet doesn't mean it hasn't happened. If it was bad enough to split the personality, the experiences are also well guarded and protected for survival. Best of luck.

Originally posted by kshaund

What I have learned about this through studies and biographies is every case without exception results from extreme trauma and abuse as a child. The mind compartmentalizes itself to be able to shelter some of the personality from the horror, which is usually why there's a dominant personality that takes care of them.

What is very strange is that he doesn't recall anything out of the ordinary happening to him. I've talked to his brother and sisters, parents, even his ex-wife (they split because his moods were unbearable, and now I understand her completely), and no one knows why this happened.
Maybe something really bad happened and no one knew about it and he never shared it and now he doesn't remember the event, who knows....

Thanks to all for your replies.

reply to post by haika


I don't recall learning of split personality without trauma - other possibilities are satanic abuse in which the entire family could be involved; perhaps he was the only one abused in the family as sometimes happened; alien abductions; who knows - it's just not normal to have a split personality without trauma.

Which means that if he really hasn't experienced trauma/abuse as a child, then likely it's really not MPD, perhaps it's a chemical imbalance (too much copper; vitamin deficiency; etc.) which can cause symptoms of extreme mood swings and hallucinations... just another thought.... best of luck.

PS on the possibility of being a chemical imbalance - generally doctors are not in agreement that there is such a thing in the first place, and secondly aren't keen on ordering very detailed blood screening to detect all the different metallic levels, etc. Might have to go through a special physician, natural doctor or someone who has worked along this lines already and experienced, otherwise you'll be told that's not a possibility and it really is -

Originally posted by kshaund
PS on the possibility of being a chemical imbalance - generally doctors are not in agreement that there is such a thing in the first place, and secondly aren't keen on ordering very detailed blood screening to detect all the different metallic levels, etc. Might have to go through a special physician, natural doctor or someone who has worked along this lines already and experienced, otherwise you'll be told that's not a possibility and it really is -

I'd have to agree. I would not accept the MPD diagnoses without getting highly qualified confirmation. So many mental disorders or chemical imbalances can appear to the untrained as something other than what it really is.