Prison life is too easy!

Originally posted by they see ALL

Originally posted by ProtoplasmicTraveler
I told him the truth, work, wife, kids, too many responsibilities not enough time...I thought about it a moment and couldn't help but see the irony in it as I finally told him..."come to think of it, going to prison has been the most fun I have had in ages!"

Exactly. I have a question, though. All these cool things were on a navy base or was it actually part of the prison? If the latter is true, you have greatly proved my point! Actually both would prove my point, as you bring allowed on base was a part of the prison experience. Were you in the navy?

No I wasn't in the Navy.

The Bureau of Prisons decides on sentencing recomendations issued by judges and probation workers what type of custody and facility they want to assign you.

House arrest is the lowest level of custody.

Community custody is the second lowest level of custody. That's the level I was assigned and you are deemed to not pose a threat to the community at large based on your criminality patterns, therefore in essence the community has custody of you in a sense.

Many Community custody prisoners are housed on Military bases as low paid workers contracted between the Military and the Bureau of Prisons.

The Military basically assigns everyone a job as either someone working to care for the prisoners, a cook, an orderly, a laundry attendent etc, or working for the Military or one of it's auxillary agencies.

Most prisoners with no skills are given menial labor jobs of landscaping. Prisoners with construction or trade skills are put to work building and repairing things and if they are journeymen or higher might even be given supervisory roles over military personnel on their jobs. People with serious electronics backgrounds are employed as electricians and some are even granted security clearances in order to work in sensitive areas of the base.

During work hours you are supervised by which ever military person or civilian is the boss of your work detail. Bureau of Prison Gaurds will infrequently stage routine 'suprise' inspections to do head counts and administer breathalizer tests to inmates. I was given direct access to alchahol in my job but for the inmate willign to take a chance liqour, drugs as well as prostitutes could be had as well as other food and convenience luxuries. Like any other environment or part of society the more money you had the more could be bought with it.

The bases that housed prisoners had sections that were designated prisoner areas, that is you were not supposed to venture into other parts of the base unless given permission to do so for work. The Bureau of Prisons would supervise these areas and the inmates as well as do periodic patrolls of the entire base to make sure no inmates were in unauthrorized areas.

It's important to realize in this level of custody there is no fighting and no one tries to escape and very few people will willfully violate any rule unless plaqued by some addiction because any single infraction would change your custody status to a higher level of supervision at another facilitly.

The prison camps that are on Airforce, Navy and now Army bases are designed for non-violent offenders who have a 10 year sentence or less or a non-violent offender within 10 years of realease they now wish to start integrating back into the community.

There is a disciplined atmosphere overall and no one takes the fact that they are in custody lightly. Nor do the Bureau of Prison's officials take the fact that you are in custody lightly.

Prisons by and large on all levels are respect based atmospheres and facilities. Gaurds are considered little different than inmates but simply doing 'time' in eight hour shifts, there is a mutual empathy when their is a mutual respect and both prisoners and inmates generally strive for that mutual respect.

Similiarly there is a mutual respect between military personnel and prisoners for the most part because the military personnel envision little difference between the prisoners plight and their own. The prisoner has three years to serve on his term, the Navy yoeman has three more years to go on their elistment, and neither is free of and both are the custody of and both work for Uncle Sam.

The next level of Custody up is Low, where movements are times and controlled but a lot of recreational freedoms and educational opportunities still exist.

Low is followed by Medium where movements are much more tightly timed and there is less recreation and less opportunity for education.

Medium is followed by Maximum which is 15 hours a day in your cell 8 hours at work and 1 hour of recreation.

Maximum is followed by Super Maximum which is 24 hour a day isolation, 23 hours a day in your cell and 1 hour in solitary recreation.

Low, Medium, and Maximum as are Community Custody Inmates are all required by Federal Law to work an 8 hour day.

In community custody it's for the military at 1.00 a day and some of the jobs can be back breaking in sweltering or freezing conditions.

In Low, Medium and Maximum it is working for Unicore Industries a private for profit company much like the Federal Reserve only most of the tightly held stock is in leading politicians and celebrities hands.

Unicore makes uniforms, signs, furnitures and fixtures for the Federal Government, they make the 800.00 toilet seats and the 1500.00 desk chairs!

Inmates are paid up to 2.40 cents an hour and some can earn overtime if they are particuarly good at their jobs. Some make as little as .40 an hour dependent on their skill level.

Super Maximum Security Inmates are not elligble to work which actually counts against them in a point system that is considered in granting prisoner furloughs and releases.

There are some very bad places to do time in the Federal Prison System, the Pennatentiary at Atlanta and Levenworth and the Butler Pysciatric Facility are not places anyone wants to go or would enjoy unless a total pyscopath or completely institutionalized.

If you have to go, you want to go like I did, Club Fed.

Believe it or not on my last day at work the MWR and NAVY and Marines I worked with held a Pizza party for me, had a going away cake made, all signed a card and chipped in for a going away present!

Call me crazy I was proud of that, though the Bureau of Prison Gaurd who had to seach me when I got off the bus back to the camp that housed me sure was dumbfounded by their affection.

It takes all kinds my friend!

Originally posted by greeneyedleo
reply to post by ProtoplasmicTraveler

 

When I lived on Vandberg AFB for a short time, they had prisoners from Lompoc who worked on the base doing landscaping.

I dont know the details of it - like why they were there, etc. But certainly not a bad gig. Sunny perfect weather. Working near the beach.

Same kind of situation I was in, they were Federal Prisoners being paid a 1.00 a day housed in very similiar circumstances and conditions as I described. One of the guys in my band had done part of his sentence there before being transfered to Saufley Field which is where I was.

If you have to go to prison, it's the safest, easiest and most rewarding way to serve your time.

One night, a girl who lived down the street shows up at my house. Her boyfriend had beat her up...again, and my girlfriend and her friend decided to patch her up, and for her to stay with us that night. Her boyfriend then broke through my window, angry she was with us, and we wouldn't let him in, beat me to a pulp, dragged her outside, and beat her, and sister up very brutally. They didn't call the police, but I did. And since they wouldn't press charges, the police left it alone.

The very next morning I'm served an eviction notice. My neighbors thought I had another party and things got out of control. I begged and pleaded for the girls to go to the management office to correct the problem, but he had them so scared they wouldn't do it. The very next night, me and this guy got into it, I was arrested for being the antagonizer, even though I did nothing but ask him to man up and admit he was the cause of the problem. I was driven off in a cop car with him laughing at me. My court date was the same as my eviction date.

That day, still being naive and not knowing that FTA were very serious, I did not show up for court, i was instead throwing away all my items and personal belongings just to make room for necessities. I moved in with a family friend of mine, and was picked up a week later for a FTA for that charge of assault I got. I spent 4 weeks in jail, before my GF was able to get enough money by selling all my stuff, and by the help of good friends to make bail. I was 18, so this was treated as a first offense for me. I was put on 6 months probation, even though I already was on Juvi probation for the arson.

Things didn't work out at my new home, and I was soon forced to move in with my girlfriends parents, my dad could do nothing to help, and I was near homelessness. I began work at ODU making good money, staying sober, taking care of my restitution and everything. Part of my first offenders deal was I had to do 50 hours community service. No problem, trust me.

I did it, through a place my PO had approved previously. And against my boss's wishes, I took off enough work to get this done by my PO's deadlines, almost losing my job. The day came where finally I was about to be free of the system, when lo and behold my community service did not count. The organization had recently became a profit organization, which did not fit the criteria for community service in VA Beach. I was given a week and a half to do another 50 hours. My boss was going to fire me if I took off this much work, and my PO did nothing to work with me, as did my former employer. I was either going to lose my job and face a probation violation for being fired, or not going to be able to do the said community service, and also to get another probation violation. Due to my "felony" record as a juvenile, I was liable for up to 6 months jailtime, and my PO said she was going to push it. Because I was not willing to spend more time in jail for crap I couldn't control, I gave in to my pride and moved in with my dad and girlfriend. I have warrents in virginia now.

His girlfriend knew this, and also was not working. She was able to steal 7 G's from my father and then called the cops one night out of the blue. She reported me for my warrants which then got my dad angry, she pressed assault charges on him, even though he never laid a hand on her.

Now I'm going to court on monday for the false charges she pressed on me, as well as my dad, and I could bejailed for up to 2 years.

I ask you...am I a criminal?
And even if you say yes, I refuse to believe it.

I have no desire or need to fabricate my story to people on a message board, and this is the truth. I'm sorry; I REFUSE TO BE TREATED LIKE A CRIMINAL, AND I REFUSE TO BE BELITTLED IN JAIL AGAIN.

I await your argument.

What’s this “we” BS?
Is post is just an attempt at baiting?
It’s a complex issue and you have expressed that you don’t have the foggiest idea of what its about.

You do realize your TV show is heavily edited and only approved footage can leave the facility. Access to areas of the facilities is also limited.

It depends on where you are, what kind of privileges are available. Most places weights are gone. Most places do not allow TVs in cells. Books consist of approved magazines

Do you live in a bubble or what? The system is running at 160 percent max. A third of inmates don’t have cells. You want to make some BS claim that they are watching TV in their cells.

Yes they can buy food at the commissary. When the warden under feeds them and has pocketed the money that was allocated for food. The inmates can use money from their canteen to by food at the commissary. With the proceeds going to the pocket of the warden.

Did your TV show you how most drugs get into prison? Or did it just show you one
Visitor trying to smuggle it in? No? It didn’t show you the whole black market system? I wonder WHY

Rapes occur because the guards are indifferent. When they’re not doing the raping.
Or staging fights.

Most prisons are an overcrowded powder keg ready to explode. With guards under staffed and severely out numbered. But you want to run a riot, putting guards lives in danger so YOU can feel better about a TV.

97 percent of inmates are released. (That means a neighborhood near you)
So take a previously non-violent offender. Starve them, beat Them, Stab them, gang rape them,If they weren’t a psychopath they certainly are now. that’s who your loved one is going to bump into one fateful day. THINK ABOUT THAT.

Take solace in knowing that when the ex inmate snaps rapes and murders then gets sent back the politicians that have stock in the private prison corporations will make a few bucks, and you can once again take up your jihad against TVs and commissary soup

reply to post by Plasma applicator


You know what, my personal issue aside.

I feel you have destroyed all forms of his logic.

You are dead on, and a star for you.

This guy really peeved me tonight and you did a good job ripping apart his logic with true logic.
Kudos to you.

Originally posted by logician magician
Have you ever been to prison?

Or did you just see one on TV?

I go to prison everyday. OP is right. It's like a bunch of 5th graders going to high school.

90% of the time inmates are laughing and joking around.
The majority don't really have to spend all that much time in their cells either.

It's a relativly easy life, as long as you're not getting raped.

Originally posted by ProtoplasmicTraveler
Believe it or not on my last day at work the MWR and NAVY and Marines I worked with held a Pizza party for me, had a going away cake made, all signed a card and chipped in for a going away present!

Sounds like a great time! Now shouldn't it be more strict than you had it?

Originally posted by ThirdJohnAdams
I await your argument.

Sorry about your troubles! The argument, however, is that prison life is too easy. You have not described your time in prison, if any, so how is your whole story relevant? I just want to discuss prison life, not the entire criminal justice system. Good luck with everything, though!

Originally posted by Plasma applicator
What’s this “we” BS?
Is post is just an attempt at baiting?

First person (it makes the post more personal), and, no, I am not baiting.

You do realize your TV show is heavily edited and only approved footage can leave the facility. Access to areas of the facilities is also limited.

I don't know how true this is. Watch the show (if you haven't already), and you will see some shocking stuff. Shouldn't this stuff have been edited out?

It depends on where you are, what kind of privileges are available. Most places weights are gone. Most places do not allow TVs in cells. Books consist of approved magazines

Yes, but if prisoners had all these privileges in a very strict prison in Georgia, what does this say about other prisons?

You want to make some BS claim that they are watching TV in their cells.

That's what they had in a strict prison. Shocking, right?

Yes they can buy food at the commissary. When the warden under feeds them and has pocketed the money that was allocated for food. The inmates can use money from their canteen to by food at the commissary. With the proceeds going to the pocket of the warden.

I don't know about all that. If you could find supporting evidence, that would be helpful.

Did your TV show you how most drugs get into prison? Or did it just show you one
Visitor trying to smuggle it in? No? It didn’t show you the whole black market system? I wonder WHY

Watch the show. It showed how drugs are smuggled in through the mail, and it showed some of the black market system within the prison. It was very critical.

Rapes occur because the guards are indifferent. When they’re not doing the raping.
Or staging fights.

Why are you blaming the guards and the wardens? Please share some evidence.

Most prisons are an overcrowded powder keg ready to explode. With guards under staffed and severely out numbered. But you want to run a riot, putting guards lives in danger so YOU can feel better about a TV.

Are you saying I want riots to occur? Wrong.

So take a previously non-violent offender. Starve them, beat Them, Stab them, gang rape them,If they weren’t a psychopath they certainly are now. that’s who your loved one is going to bump into one fateful day. THINK ABOUT THAT.

This stuff, albeit very horrible, might make them think twice about committing crime. Again, I didn't say let's treat them like animals.

One television show I saw one time was about a very bad (run down and etc.) prison. Some time after the show aired, the show said, that prison was shut down because it made public the atrocities of the place. My point is that television shows can be critical.

Originally posted by ThirdJohnAdams
This guy really peeved me tonight and you did a good job ripping apart his logic with true logic.

What did I do? I just stated my views. Is this a problem? Also, he seemed pretty biased against the guards and wardens. Are you alright with this?

Originally posted by slimpickens93
I go to prison everyday. OP is right. It's like a bunch of 5th graders going to high school.

Thanks for agreeing! Do you work there?

90% of the time inmates are laughing and joking around.
The majority don't really have to spend all that much time in their cells either.

It's a big joke, huh? In the show, prisoners could hang out in the hallways of the place, where there were tables so they could play cards and etc.

It's a relativly easy life, as long as you're not getting raped.

Yup. Prisoners, not the rules, make it hard, right? Please share more of your knowledge, as people might appreciate it!

I don't think prisoners should be given those luxuries but I do think you should be able to work for them. Afterall, these people are going to be released at some point and it would be better for them not to have been some sensory deprived madman.

Originally posted by Plasma applicator
Most prisons are an overcrowded powder keg ready to explode. With guards under staffed and severely out numbered. But you want to run a riot, putting guards lives in danger so YOU can feel better about a TV.

That's the real bottom line here. Prisoners are given certain niceties so that they can be taken away for bad behavior. It's the only form of control there is for long term prisoners. Without this reward type system, all long term prisoners would have to be in a super-max type situation, which causes mental illness. If you're going to release these people back into society, you need to try and keep them sane and somewhat capable of conforming to general societal rules.

That whole post was really spot-on dude.

Originally posted by miragezero
I don't think prisoners should be given those luxuries but I do think you should be able to work for them. Afterall, these people are going to be released at some point and it would be better for them not to have been some sensory deprived madman.

Sure, they should work for them. Let them be rewarded for good behavior and the like. This was tried out in the show, but I don't think it worked though (well at least for a man with life in prison I think).

Originally posted by resistor
That's the real bottom line here. Prisoners are given certain niceties so that they can be taken away for bad behavior. It's the only form of control there is for long term prisoners. Without this reward type system, all long term prisoners would have to be in a super-max type situation, which causes mental illness.

Okay, but don't give them all these nice things right when they get there. Don't make it like a hotel. Why do people go back to prison multiple times? It must not be that bad! Why do people seek prison because of the bad economy? (There was a thread here about that, but I can't find it.) Why are meals free? It's an alright place, huh?

I don't know. All the luxuries in a prison could never equal the freedom to walk the Earth.

I don't think they should be treated brutally. It would make them crazier.

Originally posted by Donnie Darko
I don't know. All the luxuries in a prison could never equal the freedom to walk the Earth.

Sure that is definitely true, but when one goes to prison for murder, for example, he or she should not have fun things for a while.

I don't think they should be treated brutally. It would make them crazier.

I'm not either. I've never said anything like this.

Originally posted by they see ALL

Originally posted by Donnie Darko
I don't know. All the luxuries in a prison could never equal the freedom to walk the Earth.

Sure that is definitely true, but when one goes to prison for murder, for example, he or she should not have fun things for a while.

I don't think they should be treated brutally. It would make them crazier.

I'm not either. I've never said anything like this.

Ah okay. I see your point. Yeah if you commit murder, you should spend some years without much at all.

Originally posted by Donnie Darko
I don't know. All the luxuries in a prison could never equal the freedom to walk the Earth.

I don't think they should be treated brutally. It would make them crazier.

I didn't see where anyone said they should be treated brutally.

Thread title is "Prison life is too easy."

Your strawman argument is pointless.

A straw man argument is an informal fallacy based on misrepresentation of an opponent's position. To "attack a straw man" is to create the illusion of having refuted a proposition by substituting a superficially similar proposition (the "straw man"), and refuting it, without ever having actually refuted the original position.

Originally posted by Donnie Darko
Ah okay. I see your point. Yeah if you commit murder, you should spend some years without much at all.

Yes! Someone has been converted! This is the way we should all think! Doesn't it anger you that murderers are punished by watching television, lifting weights, and eating snacks?

Originally posted by slimpickens93
I didn't see where anyone said they should be treated brutally.

He gets it now.

Speaking of personal experience.

I've been locked up in County Jail several times. No stay longer than 93 days.

I also spent a year and six months in Corcoran St. Prison, California.

County Jail in Alameda County, CA. (Oakland) was far more hectic than Prison. I'd spend three months in Prison sooner than go back to county for the same amount of time. And that is a general consensus amongst all inmates, that I've ever personally talked to.

I am 26 years old and have no violent offenses on my record. Trouble found me when I got heavily into the graffiti/street art scene and was traveling throughout the country and state to make things colorful with spraypaint. Both felonies on my record are Vandalism related. I decided to plead no contest to my case since I knew my public defender didn't give a sh!t. And that's when my troubles really began- in and out.

Revolving door status, that's what our Felony Probation system does to ya'. It really gets hopeless for a 26 year old couch surfer with 35,000 dollars in restitution and a 10pm-6'am curfew. I risk arrest every night trying to find a friends house to crash at. There is no such thing as rehabilitation within our system. It's all a moneymaking slave trade and it's right under your noses.

And to the originator of this thread, I'd like to kindly extend a middle finger right atcha. You're pretty ridiculous with a statement like that. I don't see how anybody can have a real opinion on the matter until you yourself have had time under lockdown. We're not talking about the drunk tank either.

I have witnessed a lot of screwed up things while incarcerated and I am aware that my actions put me in that position... however, the only thing I learned from my time behind bars was true cynicism and how to be a smarter 'criminal'. The old saying holds true.

Stayin' out of Trouble & Still Painting - Peace

[edit on 24-4-2009 by Neurockones]

Originally posted by Neurockones
County Jail in Alameda County, CA. (Oakland) was far more hectic than Prison. I'd spend three months in Prison sooner than go back to county for the same amount of time. And that is a general consensus amongst all inmates, that I've ever personally talked to.

So it was easier than jail? Easy in general? Please be more specific.

And to the originator of this thread, I'd like to kindly extend a middle finger right atcha.

Nice. Why? You seem to agree with me!

I have witnessed a lot of screwed up things while incarcerated and I am aware that my actions put me in that position... however, the only thing I learned from my time behind bars was true cynicism and how to be a smarter 'criminal'. The old saying holds true.

Yeah, bad things happen in prison because of the inmates not because of the rules. Like I have been saying, this is a problem.

I have to say, compared to Turkey or Lebanon inmates probably have much nicer living acomomdation here in the US.
The fact that they are fed, daily, fairly well.....have access to weights, books, etc. might influence my agreement that inmates do have it pretty easy..true. I think the biggest problem might be your safety.
Especially if your cell mate is Leroy, who stands 6.5, 300.....and he's angry at everybody kinda guy.
Interesting tpoic.

what strikes me is the fact that alot of inmates might even have a better life inside the sytem, prison, because it suits them better than the "outside" world. Scary.

Too many! Prisons.

reply to post by they see ALL

It was a sitting Federal Judge who decided ultimately upon what type and to what extent my punishment would be.

A felony conviction carries a personal stigma that will follow the holder into employment, business, personal and family relationships the remainder of their lives.

Consider also this is a conspiracy site and what crime I was alleged to commit, I was charged with a conspiracy!

Things such as my criminal history, employment, family status, and the actual amount of the estimated economic damage are considered upon sentencing. Character references and recommendations factor in too.

I readily admitted my guilt happily knowing it would have no adverse impact upon anyone but me. They have a code I have a code.

My case was tried in the Federal Court House in Greenbelt MD, outside of Washington D.C., a Federal case emanating from the Capital because of political and international undertones.

The Secret Service had conducted a 3 year investigation into a 1 year period of my life and had been sitting on a Federal Grand Jury Indictment and additional 3 years beyond.

Honestly when I was told the day I was served with it by a fellow manager at work that a couple Secret Service Agents wanted to meet with me in my office I laughed and thought he was pulling my leg! When they walked in my office and pulled out their badges I was stunned, I had made no attempt to hide, had any inclination that my activities had been the subject of an intense investigation or a Federal Arrest Warrant had been outstanding over 3 years as I worked, paid utilities, and maintained Credit Lines and even received a couple of speeding tickets in my Legal Name.

I so readily and candidly admitted my involvement and culpability that the Secret Service Agents serving the indictment shamefully admitted their own political manipulations in their timing and I actually had to console the poor guys they were so distraught.

While everyone understood there were politics involved they never quite understood how involved until 6 years in the waiting they actually got to talk to me face to face.

By that time I was sitting in the Federal Prosecutor’s personal office in the Greenbelt, MD Federal Court House with the Head of the Secret Service from Washington D.C.

When they realized just what they had really stumbled into politically they looked at one another alarmed, and after cross referencing a number of entries from their boxes of bound volumes of the investigation looked at each other and said “golf”!

It is hard to believe at that level of the Federal Justice System the whole crime in their minds now boiled down to I did not know how to play Golf. Once they confirmed with me that I in fact did not know how to play and did not play the game they had decided upon what they felt was suitable justice.

They concluded if I had just orchestrated it all out on the golf course instead of multi-tasking at work, it wouldn’t be something that made their Radar and they clearly did not want things like this on their Radar.

Now I know what you are thinking, but I don’t have a masochistic bone in my body. It is a well established fact golfers are shameless masochists who love the humiliation and painful frustration of chasing a tiny little white ball around an enormous enveloping expanse of nature in the never ending quest for playing the perfect game.

I hated golf; I hate golf so yes my bemused friend this constituted cruel and unusual punishment to have to be mentored in captivity to a passable understanding and rendering of the game.

Surely you can see this as well and it’s purely a testament to my good natured, hard working and optimistic spirit that enabled me to have an enjoyable time while having to endure that horror.

Now here is what you seem to not know, and I did not really know it at the time, but accidently stumbled upon and into it in the course of all this.

The Criminal Justice System is in fact based on Contractual Law, Maritime Law, Captain’s Law, in other words Roman Republic Law.

It is all about negotiation. The state is simply looking to protect itself and manage you as profitably and efficiently as feasible in the short, mid and long run.

The Mandatory Minimum Sentencing Guidelines called for 3 ½ to 5 at the Judge’s precise discretion.

I was willing to devote a 1 ½ years to justify a negotiated adjudication.

I chose to include a Lawyer but only in an observatory capacity.

They agreed a couple of applicable Sentencing Departures could be utilized and we amicably settled upon 12-15 months of having to learn to play golf.

This was contingent upon the Probation Departments concurrence which they felt was obtainable put would put nothing in writing until they signed off on it.

The day before sentencing my attorney telephoned me to alert me the Probation Department was not signing off on the deal and was insisting on 3 ½ to 5 years.

That meant I would have to negotiate directly with the Judge.

So I set about arming myself for the encounter and hit the books.

I knew from reading fictional novels that our Justice System was loosely patterned on the Rome’s so I started out with the history books learning all about how the Roman Courts really worked and the ploys and strategies defendants would use and what the corresponding phrases for them were in Latin.

I thought this would make me appear worldly or a pseudo intellectual and at best someone well read since my documented personal history being brought into evidence lacked formal education.

So when the next day arrived I had a speech I had gone over 100 times in my mind and had a six or so good Latin Ploys down that I could pronounce in Latin and the prerequisite logistical supplements on hand to evoke them.

I allowed my attorney to officially introduce me to the Court before sitting him down, rising and asking the Judge if I could speak on my own behalf which she granted.

Public speaking takes on a whole new weight when it’s done in such an environment and it was harrowing to say the least.

I went for kind of Jimmy Stewart Goes to Washington combined with It’s a Wonderful Life Approach and would alternately evoke the Latin Phrases I had taught myself thinking this would impress the Judge who surely must know them, and would then direct her attention to the corresponding physical manifestation of those things I had brought into the Court Room. All the while I kept reassuring her I was only doing this due to my own dysfunctional arrogance which was a contemptible and villainous trait I had long been plagued by, but took comfort in her own ability to use her discretionary wisdom intuitively to understand this and to render a sentence she felt uniquely just. I threw every bit of reverse psychology and advanced sales methods into it I could muster and despite the gravity of the situation managed to stay focused on my talking points in the strategic order I wanted to lay them out in.

Now this is perhaps going to upset you but you can find some good evidence to support this on ATS.

I had no idea I was actually in a Roman Court of Law. I began to suspect something was odd when the prosecutor kept wincing when I would toss out a Latin Legal Phrase for a defensive ploy and then point to the corresponding evidence of that ploy being present, but I had no idea in fact I was accidentally speaking to the Judge in a way that in Rome carried and still carries a lot of weight. I was speaking to her like I was a genuine Roman citizen, which unbeknownst to me I was binding upon her at the same time to treat me with all the privileges a citizen of Rome is entitled too, talk about dumb luck!

It took me a little over 20 minutes to get through my summation and appeals and when I finished and composed myself I realized that everyone in the courtroom was crying. Everyone from the Federal Deputy Marshall guarding the courtroom to the Judge clutched their pocket squares and tissues dabbing their eyes trying to regain some sense of composure.

The Judge spent the next twenty minutes wordlessly whipping through one law book after another shelved behind her on her bench frowning at one after another until finally she found one that brought a smile to her face.

She had found another departure that she was going to very creatively apply, so creatively she felt compelled to first ask the Prosecutor and Probation Officer if they planned to file an appeal if she were to utilize it. I had moved both to tears and they still weren’t fully composed when they stated they had no objections to such a favorable rendering towards me.

Final Sentence imposed by the Judge 10 months and an apology that her hands were tied to do any better, apologies were quickly echoed by the Prosecutor and Probation Officer along with consolatory handshakes.

I was instructed to leave the Court Room to sign some papers with the Federal Deputy Marshall after being told I would be notified within the next 30 to 90 days as to when and where to surrender myself.

The Deputy Marshall walked up to me and stuck out his hand as well to shake mine and said “I just have to tell you I have stood in this courtroom for 22 years and in all that time I have seen maybe 2 or 3 attorneys put on a performance like yours today. It was truly an honor and privilege to listen to it and see it, and I am sorry for you because of these Mandatory Minimum Guidelines, 10 years ago when before they were made law, the Judge would have suspended your sentence, kissed you on the cheek, and given you cab fair home.”

I believe in Karma, not New World Order warped justice my friend. I think I got what I deserved, and believe me we all do. Careful what you wish for!

Originally posted by Ben Niceknowinya
I have to say, compared to Turkey or Lebanon inmates probably have much nicer living acomomdation here in the US.
The fact that they are fed, daily, fairly well.....have access to weights, books, etc. might influence my agreement that inmates do have it pretty easy..true. I think the biggest problem might be your safety.

Yes, but, remember, I'm not saying we should treat them like animals.

Interesting tpoic.

Thanks!

what strikes me is the fact that alot of inmates might even have a better life inside the sytem, prison, because it suits them better than the "outside" world. Scary.

I thought about that too. If a bum had no other options, maybe he or she could commit a crime and hang out in prison for a while.