posted on Apr, 30 2009 @ 12:05 PM
I really would like to know what exactly they are and what they really want, but I'm more concerned about the fear. I feel like I NEED to get over
that fear above everything else, and there is nothing that comes even close to how afraid they make me.
They've been around on and off since I was a kid, (as far as I can remember). There were a few of what I would call major encounters, and several
smaller ones. because of the nature of some of these encounters I question the reality of it all. I THINK it all happened. But sometimes trying to
work this out comes across almost "hokey" to myself. I have a therapist, and I sometimes find myself sensoring what I tell her.
I've tried EMDR to reduce the fear and it's helped briefly. Sometimes I'll have cycles where I don't worry about them, but I always come back to
it eventually. Sleeping with lights on, checking corners and closets, leavign the shower curtain open, being afraid to be in the house alone, feeling
I'm not entirely convinced my memories are trust worthy, and I'm thinking about hypnosis, (my therapist is licensed but reluctant to do it).
I've thought about why I'm so afraid specifically, and alot of it has to do with how it always happens at night, when I'm trying to sleep, and they
don't just knock on my door on a sunday afternoon. I read alot about the subject and I think it may fuel my paranoia, but I feel like I have to
confront it instead of just hold the problem inside forever and hope it will go away.
I alos notice the way they are portrayed on TV and in allot of pictures and personal accounts; there have only been a few I've seen that seemed to be
acurate to what I've seen. -They don't look "real". Not like actual living beings, but like stylized representations of one. Like the how the
incredibles cartoon looks as opposed to real people. Angular and stiff.
There was a thread here awhile ago about the uncanny valley and they summarized that is the source of the fear of their apearance. That they look
kind of real, but not quite, like video game characters. I agree to an extent but I feel like sometimes, they induce the fear for thier own
Anyone have any suggestions in dealing with the fear aspect? I've been depating writing out some of my memories of them and decided to get an
account here. Maybe I can get some verification with the hypnosis.