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Pick up lines !!!!!!!!!!

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posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 12:48 AM
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Whats the worst or best pick up line. That you have ever used or had used on you.


[Edited on 23-4-2004 by wondering1]



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 01:02 AM
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One of the worst ones i've had used on me.... was ....


"Let's get a bucket of chicken and f*ck".... when I was walking away "he said what you dont like chicken" ......

[Edited on 23-4-2004 by wondering1]



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 01:09 AM
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Him: Hey baby, when's a good time for us to have dinner under the stars?

Her: How about never, is never good for you?




posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 01:19 AM
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  • If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?

  • I love every bone in your body - especially mine.

  • Is it hot in here or is it just you?

  • Excuse me, I'm a little short on cash, would you mind if we shared a cab home together?

  • You know, my mother would just love you if I brought you to my place tonight and then to her place tomorrow.

  • You have the kind of legs that I like, feet on one end, pu$$y on the other.




posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 01:26 AM
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If you get turned down in an ugly way respond with:




  • I was going to tell you a joke that'll make your ti*s fall off. But it looks like somebody beat me to it.

  • I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?

  • I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 01:42 AM
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Originally posted by kinglizard

If you get turned down in an ugly way respond with:




  • I was going to tell you a joke that'll make your ti*s fall off. But it looks like somebody beat me to it.

  • I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?

  • I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.



I was once told by neanderthal I turned down that I should give Richard Simmons a call....simply because my body type is more Kate Winslet than Kate Moss. Stupid. Asshat.


But then again...if he thought I was so repulsive, why did he make a pass at me in the first place ? Can we say this together....Stupid. Asshat


The one pick-up line used on me that STILL makes me laugh to this day was from my days as a cocktail waitress.

I walked up to this table to take a drink order and the neanderthal sitting there says to me (patting his lap): "Sit down Cupcake, I'll show you what a REAL man IS"



[Edited on 23-4-2004 by KayEm]



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 02:09 AM
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Originally posted by KayEm

Originally posted by kinglizard

If you get turned down in an ugly way respond with:




  • I was going to tell you a joke that'll make your ti*s fall off. But it looks like somebody beat me to it.

  • I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?

  • I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.



I was once told by neanderthal I turned down that I should give Richard Simmons a call....simply because my body type is more Kate Winslet than Kate Moss. Stupid. Asshat.


But then again...if he thought I was so repulsive, why did he make a pass at me in the first place ? Can we say this together....Stupid. Asshat


The one pick-up line used on me that STILL makes me laugh to this day was from my days as a cocktail waitress.

I walked up to this table to take a drink order and the neanderthal sitting there says to me (patting his lap): "Sit down Cupcake, I'll show you what a REAL man IS"



[Edited on 23-4-2004 by KayEm]


hi-5's KayEm lololol!!!



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:16 AM
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I don't know if this counts as a 'pick up line' but when KayEm and myself first met, she thought I was GAY !

Apparently I was too sensitive to be otherwise.




posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:20 AM
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Originally posted by Pisky
I don't know if this counts as a 'pick up line' but when KayEm and myself first met, she thought I was GAY !

Apparently I was too sensitive to be otherwise.




lol, well, women really like sensitive men a lot. 'you hear that everyone'?? hehe



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:20 AM
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lol, those are funny.

The other night this guy I was talking to in a bar lightly punched my arm. He then said, "Wow, you're pretty sturdy. You up for another workout?"

wtf. lmao. I almost cried it was so funny.



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:36 AM
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Womens pick up lines for Men

Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?"
Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?"
Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd really like to get into your pants."
Woman: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."
Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "Voulez-vous vous coucher avec moi ce soir?"
(Would you like to go to bed with me tonight?)
Woman: "Je voudrais bien, mais je n'ai rien a porter."
(I would love to, but I have nothing to wear.)

Man: "What sign were you born under?"
Woman: "No Parking."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter" (or) "Stop."

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman: "Unfertilized!"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason."
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy."
Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane?"

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me."
Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy."
Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

Man: "May I see you pretty soon?"
Woman: "Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"

Man: "Your body is like a temple."
Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:39 AM
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hehehe. I like these two.

"Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:51 AM
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Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

Baicarumba...are those real?

Be unique and different, just say yes.

Can I flirt with you?

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin.

Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 03:59 AM
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Heres Some Medieval Pick Up Lines


I have the key to your chastity belt and you have the key to my heart.

Can I hose down your doublet?

Your eyes are as dark as a castle moat by midnight.
Lower your drawbridge and let me cross.

You should be glad I'm not a Viking. You would have been ravaged and plundered by now.

What's a nice maiden like you doing in a dungeon like this?

Come up and see my scrolls.

You can scale my battlements any day, madam.

You scratch my boils and I'll scratch yours.

They don't call me Lance-A-Lot for nothing, you know.

My that's a fine set of chalices you have there.

Ssh, I don't want everyone to know I'm on a secret holy quest.

When the Inquisition put me on the rack, my limbs weren't the only thing they stretched.



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 09:17 PM
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A guy once told me...
"I love the way your legs go up and make an @ss of themselves"


[Edited on 23-4-2004 by Pandemonium]



posted on Apr, 23 2004 @ 11:33 PM
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1. (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt) then tell her Let's get you out of these wet clothes.

2. Nice legs...what time do they open?

3. Do you work for UPS? I thought I saw you checking out my package.

4. You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

5. I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

6. Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.

7. I wish you were a Pony Carousel outside Superdrug, so I could ride you all day long for a quarter.

8. Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a braille name tag.

9. I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

10. Is that a ladder in your stockings or the stairway the heaven?

11. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.

12. I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

13. If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.

14. (Look down at your crotch) Well It's not just going to suck itself.

15. You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

16. F @# me if I'm wrong, but is your name Helga Titsbottom?

17. Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.

18. My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming it later.

19. Hi, I'm Mr. Right. Someone said you were looking for me.

20. My friend wants to know if YOU think I'M cute."

21. I've lost my phone number, can I have yours?

22. If you were the last woman and I was the last man on earth, I bet we could do it in public.

23. Baby, I'm an American Express lover...you shouldn't go home without me.

24. Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I???

25. Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them.

26. I lost my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.



posted on Apr, 24 2004 @ 01:43 PM
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Wanna play army? I'll lay down and you can blow the hell outta me.



hahahaha, that's a good one.



posted on Apr, 25 2004 @ 09:02 AM
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I got the F the C and the K, all I need is U


This one is my personal favorite, although the "I love the way your legs go up and make an @ss of themselves" on I just read. Damn that was funny.

So, you lick your finger like you would to flip pages, touch her shirt and then touch yours. Then say "Let's get out of these wet clothes."



It's much funnier actually done.




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