RFID tags now in a PEN! Analysis of the 1 April joke in The Age

I found this advertisement in the Australian newspaper called 'The Age' (Available only in Victoria). It was on page 15 in the 'World' part of the paper.
Amongst all the rhetoric about the 'recession', Israel giving a green light to their army for killing civilians, and 'probes' into Arafat's "death", I was nearly too distracted by all the disinformation on the page to notice the ad.

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/131c1ca9ae6c.jpg[/atsimg]

If you are unable to view the image, here is a transcription of the text:

Artline pens.
Now with microchip tracking.
If you're sick of your favourite pens being borrowed forever, Artline has pin-pointed the solution. For a limited time, our pens will be available fitted with a trackable microchip. If one goes missing, you can go online and track it to within a metre, anywhere on earth. For more information on this technology visit artline.com.au

Artline, the pen more people pinch.

Now for my (amateur) Neuro-Linguistic Programming analyses of this ad:
If you're sick of your favourite pens being borrowed forever, (am I sick because people are forever borrowing my pens, or am I forever sick because people keep borrowing my pens? Thank you artline for telling me that I need to feel sick now, hence setting me up for a remedy in the next sentence, so I trust you) Artline has pin-pointed the solution. (we are supposed to think that they are both 'on the ball' (pun intended, to replace the 'pin' in the sentence, to fit with 'ball-point'), and that they have made the solution so miniscule and insignificant that we aren't to worry about it because nothing that small could possibly be of any danger!)
For a limited time, our pens will be available (typical sales BS tactic to create a sense of urgency and get the adrenaline rushing to lower buyer defenses) fitted with a trackable microchip. (trackable by whom, I may ask? Note they use the word 'fitted', to imply that they naturally come with a built-in chip, rather than it being an addon. They didn't use the words 'now with a free trackable microchip'. This is to make us believe that the pen and the chip are a single entity.)
If one goes missing, you can go online and track it to within a metre, anywhere on earth. (if one what goes missing? Do they mean if a CHIP goes missing, or if a PEN goes missing? I thought we were talking about my FAVOURITE pen here, as in singular, not plural. We are meant to believe that there are a large number of these pens now, because they've gone from using singular pronouns to plurals. This is to create a natural rhythm within the buyer to get them used to the multiplication of the product, so when they see an excess of RFID chipped items in the markets, they see it as being natural.
For more information on this technology visit artline.com.au.

When one goes to their website, you see that it is in 'fact' an April Fool's Joke. I cry BS, this is all intended to lower our buyer responses to the ever-increasing amount of RFID tags in the market. No joke is printed in the newspaper without good reason.

[edit on 31/3/2009 by nrky]

[edit on 31/3/2009 by nrky]

Originally posted by nrky
No joke is printed in the newspaper without good reason.

Yes there are. April Fools Day jokes are printed in newspapers all the time. Some of them are obvious hoaxes, others fool people everywhere.

The British newspaper The Guardian published a special seven-page supplement devoted to San Serriffe, a small republic said to consist of several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean

Burger King published a full page advertisement in USA Today announcing the introduction of a new item to their menu: a "Left-Handed Whopper" specially designed for the 32 million left-handed Americans

www.examiner.com...

www.telegraph.co.uk...

You're also taking use of the word "sick" literally. It's not sick as in "I feel sick" it's sick as in "I'm tired of you borrowing my pen all the time."


[edit on 3/31/2009 by Zaphod58]

Originally posted by Zaphod58

Originally posted by nrky
No joke is printed in the newspaper without good reason.

Yes there are. April Fools Day jokes are printed in newspapers all the time. Some of them are obvious hoaxes, others fool people everywhere.

I'm talking from an 'Illuminati control the media and the world' perspective here. To create an image of every-day items containing trackable RFID microchips, only to disregard it as 'just a hoax', is a tactic to lower our defenses to these sorts of things. This conspiracy theory is similar the theory that the original broadcasting of War Of The Worlds was used to make people disbelieve the alien/UFO theories.
It's all one big distraction.

Originally posted by Zaphod58
You're also taking use of the word "sick" literally. It's not sick as in "I feel sick" it's sick as in "I'm tired of you borrowing my pen all the time."

That's the beauty of NLP, where they can use words in English that have dual meanings to confuse you, commonly known as 'doublespeak'.

Originally posted by nrky
I'm talking from an 'Illuminati control the media and the world' perspective here. To create an image of every-day items containing trackable RFID microchips, only to disregard it as 'just a hoax', is a tactic to lower our defenses to these sorts of things.

Yes, I was sucked into your dissemination of the advertisement. You obviously have a high IQ to break down marketing to it's constituent values. Most people don't rave like you do about advertising schemes and have the ability to easily see through them with or without quantifying as you have here. Excellent catch. Excellent post.

I started wondering about validity when they claim the pen can be found anywhere on earth within a meter or so... RFID's require a receiver in relatively close proximity. Being in the middle of the outback tripping over receivers to track a pen is highly unlikely but people just don't understand the technology. I worked with them in early 2000 and their range was something like 40' feet. It's probably better now but they aren't going to track RFID's by satellite just yet, in my opinion. I could be wrong.

Any RFID device with potential to track me is unacceptable.

Keep your pen.


[edit on 3·31·09 by DrMattMaddix]

reply to post by DrMattMaddix


Are you kidding, with all the good pens that have gotten up and walked away from my desk I'd love to have a tracking chip in my good pens. It drove me nuts when I'd finally get a good pen and then someone would walk off with it.

www.artline.com.au...

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS

It's not unreasonable to believe that Artline are pushing the boundaries of innovation.
We've been doing so for many generations and will continue to do so for many more to come.
Maybe one day there really will be a pen with tracking capabilities, but until then, why not...

[edit on 1/4/09 by Nventual]

interestingly enough another April Fools "joke" in Australia today featured the use of RFID

THE Australian Football League is trialling a prototype Sherrin football that contains a satellite-tracking device similar to those used in car navigation systems. The prototype "gBall", developed in partnership with the AFL and search and online mapping giant Google, will be tested in junior football matches this weekend. The balls are fitted with durable global-positioning and motion-sensing chips that measure the location, force, and torque of a kick. They collect statistics using an algorithm known as DENNIS (Dimensional, Elastic, Non-Linear, Network-Neutral, Inertial Sequencing) and then upload the data to the internet.

www.news.com.au...

Truly an excellent find!

Originally posted by nrky
No joke is printed in the newspaper without good reason.

How correct. It's obviously designed to make most people believe they are already out there, so when the idea is raised to put them on more objects, people will think, "Why not? They're already in our pens".

Love the way they even tell us how it's going to happen. The next step after products is children. And for the masses to accept it as a good idea to chip their children means more children need to go missing.