posted on Mar, 31 2009 @ 10:49 AM
Men are NOT more sexual than women. However, in our society, it is ingrained in "good girls" that they don't put out to just anyone and often the
mantra is "wait for the ring".
When it comes to gay men, the reason the bathroom is the prefered locale for encountering a sex partner is because you are guaranteed a form of "song
and dance" that is understood to make sure you two know you are mutually into the same thing....it's something that, except in certain areas of the
world, you couldn't do in public (in some places because of stigma, in others because of laws against it and even the death penalty [including death
It is a SEVERE double-standard to push a group of people underground for their own survival and then demonize them for always lurking and sneaking
around when it comes to sex.
Also, since open relationships and marriage are frowned upon and in most places illegal, there is no encouragement for being monogamous. It's hard
enough as a gay person to find someone else with your same preference, and then narrow down the field to someone with similar interests who you are
compatible with, etc. (as is done in "straight circles").
This depressing lifestyle of hiding your real intentions all the time and never being able to easily find your other half drives many people in the
gay community into addiction to meet their needs. It could be sexual addiction or drugs or alcohol.
The truth is that sexual desire exists in most humans and pulses strongly, and when you don't have an outlet and feel it needs to be secretive all
the time - then, YES - I would argue that is the "sexual dysfunction" the OP's article speaks of.
Final thought: Consider this scenario - you are a straight man at a cafe and you see a girl who's hot and reading a book you are into or over hear
her talking about something that you really like (a band, a vacation destination, politics, culture, a sports team, whatever), so, you approach her
and strike up a conversation with the intention of getting to know her better and potentially to see if you can meet each other specifically again
(like on a date).
Now, as a gay man, if you are in that same cafe and see a guy who not only seems physically pleasing and has something in common as far as interests
go...try approaching him!!!!! In our society, that would be a major no-no. As soon as it's obvious that you are interested in him, it can lead to a
socially-awkward, if not dangerous situation. Many straight men are conditioned to take it incredibly personally when they are approached in this
manner and can become far more violent than the average disagreeably social encounter calls for.
When was the last time you saw a man become aggressively confrontational when a member of the opposite sex approached him out of a specific interest
in him???? Doesn't happen. Major double-standard, also, because in our society, the woman need not become violent with the man (unless he doesn't
disregard her lack of interest and becomes pushy) just because he showed an interest in her.