posted on Mar, 7 2009 @ 10:17 AM
I originally wrote this on my blog, but thought it needed a wider audience. I've had to edit it a bit to fit in to the T&C of this site. I figure
most of you will encounter a disabled person or 3 in your lives, this could be beneficial.
quick note on the word cripple. It may seem offensive, but it's not. You can find numerous disability blogs and podcasts by disabled people using
the word normally. If you're offended, I'm sorry. Here we go!
In my 28 years of crippledness I’ve dealt with lots of people who all react differently to me, and probably a lot of other cripples they see. It
can be quite frustrating, so I’m going to go over a few basics that you should follow when dealing with a cripple. Consider it cripple etiquette
Don’t just stare at us
Seriously, I hate that. No matter how long you stare at me I’m not going to do a trick. And if you think you’re being sly about it and I don’t
notice…I do. It’s rude and it’s insulting.
I’m not deaf or dumb
You don’t need to talk in a slow loud voice for me to understand you. This is worse than staring, IMO. Why do you automatically assume that my lack
of limbs equates to a lack of normal intelligence? When this happens I assume I am smarter than you and will take advantage of that fact.
Don’t pat me on the head
Seriously. I’m not your dog or your kid
Don’t tell me “It’s great to see you out, buddy!”
Trust me, the feelings not mutual
Yes, I can have sex
I like it too!
Ladies, stop telling me I’m a ‘great guy’
I’m really not. But beyond that I know that this is code for “You will never see me naked”. Take a walk on the wild side. I’m just as capable
of being an emotionally unavailable jerk boyfriend as that jackass you were talking to earlier.
Don’t tell me I’m an inspiration
Don’t ask if I need help, and don’t just help uninvited either
I’m stubbornly independent. I hate needing help. Even if you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I do need help, wait ’till I ask.
If I’m out with my attendant, ignore her and talk to me
She’s there to hold my junk while I pee, not answer questions about me. She should be seen and not heard. Just pretend she’s not there. That’s
what I do
If you’re my waiter/waitress and I’m out with people, don’t ask them what I want
Here’s a novel idea…ASK ME! It’s beyond insulting when you assume I can’t be trusted to decide what I want to eat.
I hear what you say about me
This goes back to me not being deaf. I was at a party once with a friend and a bunch of people I didn’t know. These two dudes sitting just a few
feet away were whispering loudly about how messed up I was…I CAN HEAR YOU!
There’s a lot more, I’ll add to this list as I think of more.
So there you have it.
[edit on 3/7/2009 by NoArmsJames]