Anytime bro. G'nite.

Join the club. Im 21 myself and lost the love of my life last summer, it sucked !
I loved her so much too. Though the fault was both ways.

Deep

Losing someone that you have cared about since childhood is rough and will take a long time to get past. Time has a way of healing wounds, though. The most important thing this experience will offer, is a chance to work on yourself and become a better person because of it. Most people focus on the reasons they were not at fault for things falling apart, instead of trying to understand what their shortcomings were, in order to learn from them. Nobody is perfect and breakups are rarely the fault of just one person.

As the other responses to your post have made clear, there is a lot of pressure placed on guys to be players. The majority of guys nowdays seem to think that real men don't believe in love or that they must be shallow and emotionless. I think this is a very unfortunate way of thinking. It limits the potential of finding a meaningful and happy relationship. People complain that they can't find the right person for them, but when they do, they don't appreciate each other.

What guys/girls often fail to realize is that women/men are their counter-balance. Where men tend to think literally and logically, women think metaphorically and abstractly. Women are obviously emtionally driven, whereas guys are visually inspired.
There is no reason for these differences to cause problems between the sexes. We all just need to try and see things from each other's perspective. We were meant to complete each other and learn from each other.
Men are incredible, but their good points are often hidden by their refusal to expose any vunerability. Women are not all as crazy as we seem, either. Emotions tend to be overwhelming sometimes and women often have a more difficult time being purely objective about things.

People seem to think that in order to be wanted, they have to act like someone else, or that it is too much of a risk to expose their real self.

I don't know you or what you are like as a person, but it seems like you are a great guy who is learning about love the hard way. Everything in life can be learned from, good or bad.

I mostly just want to tell you, and you can take it or leave it, but true love does exist and all it needs to survive is to be recognized and accepted. Don't let the calloused and cynical infect your mind and turn you into one of them. Life is too short to spend like that when you don't have to. Anyways just my two cents. Things will look up eventually, these things just take time!

There's people out there want to "have their cake and it too"...

Your one of them... You want the best of both worlds my friend, but a woman isn't just going to sit by and watch you go off and get # faced, gamble, be with your friends, and then expect her to be there when you get home...

It's gets tiring after awhile... Women want security, they want a man that can be their best friend, a man that can pull up his pants when he needs to, and you can't.

Your simply not mature enough for a relationship where you and her are best friends.
You may want to be with your friends, which is fine, thats the age your supposed to that, but you can't say that you fukced up and that your sorry, because your not.

Your sorry she's gone, your sorry that you thought you could get away with it, you tested the waters, and pushed more and more to see how much you could get away with, and now that she's gone, your sorry...

She doesn't want to see you because you are ignorant, you ignored her wished, your loyalties weren't with her, they were with your "m8's" you crossed her after she asked you not to, and you did...

So your only sorry now because your on your own with your own sorry ass, and nobody is there to keep your sorry asz company...

Friends can only be there for you so much, it's the woman in your life who would be there for you thick and thin and threw her away..

You self sabatoged the relationship, you probably subconsciously saw this coming because you set yourself up for a loss...

Maybe you believe you don't deserve that kind of life, that your life only involves petty things like social drinking, gambling and whatever else you did to lose her. Maybe you should take some time out to re evaluate your life, she's not just going to come back because you said sorry......


She's smarter then that, and i'm sure she knows you better then you know yourself, thats why she's not coming back...

And she's not a bithc for leaving, she's smart... If I were her, I wouldn't want to sit around and wait for you to come home after your done doing whatever you felt the need to do, to get whatever out of yoursystem.

Nope, i'd leave, i'd have my own life where I could do what I want, when I want, not sit around like a dog and wait for a boy who calls himself a man to come home to me and then pay attention... That's selfish, ignorant, rude, and insulting.

Why should she put up with that??

So like I saie earilier, your just sorry cuz she left and now your on your own. Your sorry you got rejected.


I don't feel for you, I pity you, because you just let a great girl walk out on you because your priorities weren't where they should of been and you crossed her.

Ouch truelies! I felt that.
That's a tad harsh, he realises he's done (supposedly) wrong. We don't know the full ins and outs to judge, he was just purely saying to men that they should remember how great us women are, so we shouldn't knock him! And by the sounds of what he's posted (if you read properly) he was spended 5-6 nights a week with her, so not paying enough attention to her seems out the window. Just my two pennies.

Originally posted by LadyCool21
Ouch truelies! I felt that.
That's a tad harsh, he realises he's done (supposedly) wrong. We don't know the full ins and outs to judge, he was just purely saying to men that they should remember how great us women are, so we shouldn't knock him! And by the sounds of what he's posted (if you read properly) he was spended 5-6 nights a week with her, so not paying enough attention to her seems out the window. Just my two pennies.

If you read the rest of his posts you'll see that he didn't spend enough attention.


And it maybe harsh but i'm not here to play nice, thats my two cents just like you put in yours, I believe you can give me that...

He is a grown man, he can take it, he's not going to cry over it.. Hopefully he can read it and maybe say some of it was right, and maybe he didn't know some of things I pointed out..

I'm here to help, not baby.

truelies that was a bit harsh but i know wot ur sayin and living with the consequences. on the other hand at least shes started talking to me again and we r gonna try and start over with her staying at her parents for a few months and see how things go

Well MM, a start. Take it slow man, problems don't just disappear, takes work. Know what you want, give her the space to figure out her what she does, if it's the same you're ok. Don't push it.

Originally posted by madmartinez
truelies that was a bit harsh but i know wot ur sayin and living with the consequences. on the other hand at least shes started talking to me again and we r gonna try and start over with her staying at her parents for a few months and see how things go

Good luck mad, Hope you learned, this time around show her how much you appreciate her. Relationships is all about giving of yourself.
If you take to much and expect too much from the other person it won't work.
If you give all of yourself to the other person, and vice versa, it's bound to work 100%.
Relationships are about unity, if your not ready to unite then maybe it's best if u go out with your boys still.

But anyway, i'm so happy for you, good luck my friend.