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there is a longer explanation letter at 30daystodeath.com soon. Youtube is telling me its too long to stick in this description field. (well now it seems to be hacked. Hopefully I will get the chance to post the full letter soon)
The 30th day of this blog, is in the form of an 89 minute film titled Death Perception that myself and a dozen other talented artists worked together to make. The character in these vlogs, Clint, almost lives his last day in the film, which is a cautionary tale of depression and its seriousness, which allows us to see him as he barely climbs out of it. The 30daystodeath blog serves as a prequel for the film, as the characters video blogs over the last month lead up to day the in which the film takes place.
I am an artist. But I knew I had a responsibility to the weight of this material. This is obviously a very touchy subject and cannot be approached without quite a lot of work to make the message clear. If one person who has been in the grip of this mindset, has seen this prequel or the film and it has helped them realize this. It was worth it.
Some stories have to be told from the mindset of those its intended for.
The poignancy of this mans tragedy is in the understanding of that mindset. So I decided it could use a prequel. I wanted to reach those who are using the same justifications that Clint does in the blogs.
So I wrote a bunch of monologues, filmed them on a little Kodak EasyShare and just pieced together a journal that led this character up to the beginning of our film. Its like a really in-depth, involved trailer. Or a small interactive TV-show to promote the film since the character in the 30daystodeath blogs, only addresses the other characters that exist in the world of the FILM itself. Noone else.
This entire project is about one thing. Young people who are already depressed and feel no way out of their bubble of thinking. The bottom line is this is about bringing attention to how much a person can alter their perceptions and their own logic to avoid the parts of their life they SHOULD be focusing on, the things they feel are too painful to face, and instead adopt a way of thinking that caters to their need for an easy route. Selfishly justifying ways around the pain it will cause their friends and family and the insult it is to their own personal potential. Depression is a terrible thing because of this power it has on our thinking and perception. When it is you, you never see it coming. Its like a personality parasite. Your own need for alleviating yourself of all these worldly problems feeds itself by giving you a sense of finality and convinces you it is the only way you can breath easily and relax. But all of the problems youre avoiding, do not disappear. They transfer to everyone who knows you, for them to carry.
A lot of films and media that deal with depression I find is preachy, youll go to hell etc etc. But that doesnt work on someone who is already in the grip of severe depression, that hyper selfish attitude that permanently separates you from the rest of the world. I knew one thing in my heart that was most important, this was the first time this hoax was going to occur and try to help people. The two ways I feel that I can do that with this particular project is to attempt to get it hopefully seen by someone in the position of this character and identify with not only the words and thoughts but also with the realization that it is self-indulgent and think "oh wait. maybe Im not listening enough to myself. Maybe my subconscious is hearing only what it wants to hear." Secondly, if by chance anyone does take notice and decide to purchase the film, I am donating all of the proceeds from Amazon sales of the film to the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention. I want to make that perfectly clear, I AM NOT MAKING A SINGLE DIME FROM THE AMAZON SALES. You will be helping a good cause if/when any copy of Death Perception is purchased.
I sincerely apologize for being misleading, however I hope that you can understand now that I worked very hard with the very best intentions. This is a tough time right now, I see a lot of suicides in the news as people are losing their homes and livelihoods. Depression is a serious thing and very dangerous. Feel free to write me an email if you have any further questions or comments and I will be happy to respond.