I honestly don't think my doctor is intentionally trying to kill me, but given the circumstances it's almost hard to consider an alternative. I will
detail the problem as best I can:
The problem is with my bowels. For about a year and a half I've had diarrea (most likely not spelled correctly...) and thin stool with lots of blood.
This began in September of 2007. I had a colonoscopy as well as a rectal exam that showed trace amounts of blood and the doctor said it was an anal
fissure....which really doesnt explain it and I could tell once he came to this conclusion he stopped checking the colon....he was very wishy washy
about it. The anal fissure healed over time though I have abdomen pain as well. Since having other symptoms over the past 3 weeks, including all types
of stomach spasms, fevers, chills, and pains, the bleeding has increased and even made me wobbly at times on my knees. I literally am sweating in 20
degree weather. Because of the above mentioned reasons I am not well enough to attend school this year.
He asked if colon cancer ran in the family and I said "I don't know" (back before I knew it did. In fact a good portion of the males in my family
are diagnosed around age 40, starting with my Great Grandfather and literally every male in his family and so on).
At which point he said "It is probably all in your head because of your anxiety disorder" (He may in fact be mentally challenged because I told him
repeatedly that my anxiety disorder was from back in high school when I saw him 6 years ago and since then am one of the least anxious people I know)
....The fact of the matter is if I stuck my finger up my butt right now there would be blood (excuse my language). Physical doctors don't know how to
deal with mental illness (or the lack of one they still think exists). I can only assume he is either using the old approach of mental illness used in
the 50's or he got his medical degree at a back door med school in the Caribbean....which is honestly not that hard to do....
But...you know....I guess its all in my head.....
Unfortunately he sent his diagnosis to all the local hospitals so even if I go to a hospital they will not treat me because they keep referring to the
colonoscopy that was "done" and the CAT scan....when the CAT scan actually is BS to begin with because it never noticed I had a tumor growing over
I am only 22, it's bull **** that I have to deal with this and miss school because of it and every time I need to schedule an appointment with
someone I'm put on at least a month waiting list. My family is Yale grads, we aren't in Africa. I guess this is America's health care system.
Another possibility is that since I look way more German than Asian that he may in fact hate the Germans since he's Jewish. Lol, I dunno, I'm trying
to find a way to excuse his ignorance.
Does anyone have any advice on what next steps I should take? Does anyone else feel this is a problem? Or is it all in my head based off of some
"anxiety mental illness" that does not exist? Perhaps I should send him photos of the large quantities of blood that comes out my rectum on a daily
Thanks for listening....time to go to the bathroom