posted on Dec, 30 2008 @ 09:41 AM
No, no, not done with the thread. Had to take a break from all of that writing/rambling I did.
It's great to know that the thread has helped at least 2 people here. Just writing all of this stuff down helped me get a clearer perspective.
I have scaled things down a notch, not trying to be so affectionate, etc. I thought it was helping but I can see how that can be interpreted as
annoying if you're depressed or stressed out. You have to give people space.
dBates, I think you're right. My wife was never a "hugger", I think it comes from her upbringing. They were not very supportive or affectionate
people even though they all loved each other.
I made a very conscious decision to be more affectionate and supportive with my wife, but she never got the memo.
I'm realizing that that's ok, it doesn't mean I'm being rejected. After all of this writing I did here, reading other's input, etc. I'm starting
to see that I might have been reacting in a "hypersensitive" way.
My wife has been extremely tired, I thought since she wasn't responding the way I wanted to my affection that she was rejecting me, or she was seeing
someone. (The poor girl wouldn't have more than a half hour a week to have an affair, I guess you would call that a "power-affair"). Although
anyting is possible I really doubt it. She does ask me to go around with her whenever she has free time, and gets disappointed when I don't.
I got hypersensitive and paranoid. I'm glad I had that talk with her though, since I did discover some things and she discovered some things too.
Wow, what a complete 180 degree turn around I did on this. From anger/resentment to understanding and acceptance!
(Until I have another hypersensitive episode).
But seriously, the very insightful replies here have helped a great deal. I just thought I was going to write about all of this as a way of releasing
it, I was very surprised by the thoughtful comments.