The nothing feeling. is this the state of mind i should be in or is there somthing wrong with this

well for one thing i have never posted a thread on ATS before i even just made an account about 4 hours ago so i could post my own threads and respond to other as this is probally the best site i have seen ever i enjoy almost everything people ask and reply with so i thought it was my turn to ask or say somthing and see what other people have to say about it. I'm only 17 i dont really have conversations like this with anyone only because the few times i have tryed no one has understood what i am trying to say. lets get to the point


Over the past year the ways i have been thinking and preceived things has changed a great deal not for the worse or for the better but im finding it harder and harder to talk to people i have never talked to or continue to talk to people i have before. I for some reason come off odd and or troubled to these people just by giving in my thoughts or opinions on a topic we are currently on. I have basicly lost the will to want to do anything or care about anything there is nothing i can see myself doing and enjoying i play music and would love to do that but as we all know that does not work. i cant comprehend how people say they dont mind working in the back of toys R us moving boxes all day or being in an office and answering phone calls that do not matter to them. this thread is kind of all over the place but the get to the main point. i cant get passed that there is no point to anything we do and its amazing that i can get around this because i am only 17 and i have a long life ahead of me but whats ahead of me? i dont even care i dont want to do anything there is nothing i want to experience and what i have already learned about life is the happy does not out weigh the sad. When one is sad they dwell on it and hate the feeling, when one is happy they dont think to themselves i am so happy right and enjoy being happy they just do not notice since they are not sad so does that mean there is only a content and a sad? is that the only thing i will experience throughout the rest of my life? these overwhelming sad moments and then these almost meaningless short lived periods of happy.

Thanks for sharing.

Do yourself a favor and read this book.

It is the truth.

Your assessment of how one thinks when happy vs. how one thinks when sad is extremely narrow; you seem to have relayed your experience as how these emotions register for everyone. Wrong, my friend.

When I am happy, I acknowledge it, cultivate it and often can replicate it.

Hang in there. Joy exists. First you have to believe it. Then you have to choose it. Impossible? Read the book.

And I say this to you because I used to think very similar thoughts [esp. when I was your age]---stop feeling sorry for yourself!

No offense intended. But c'mon, man...or woman. Either way. Life could ALWAYS be worse. Buck up. You can do it. Believe that.

I understand life can always be worse but can it get any better? i didnt mean for my thread to make it seem thats how i thought everyone registerd these emotions. i just want to get past this myself i believe joy exists and everything its just the fact i cant enjoy anything. it does sound pretty lame but i dont mean it in that way really. No matter what i am doing the only actions i can use to describe it is: sitting standing and moving my body around in different locations. sitting here and typing this reply feels no different then just sitting and typing out an essay everything is the same to me.

Thank you very much for the suggestive read.

[edit on 15-12-2008 by hm01cut]

It's hard to be happy in a world where black is the color-de-jour and is perpetuated by the people who think they are in favor of a world of light.
Political correctness and the common media have corrupted the facts into a place where utopia is the ideal and will never be reached unless everyone thinks alike.
Tolerance of ideology, philosophy and identity is not a one-way street.
That you can't speak openly and freely to everyone you want to should tell you more about those people than it does yourself.
The world is not bleak. It is not dying. It is being culled.

(edit to reformat paragraph)

[edit on 15-12-2008 by abecedarian]

Here's a thought..when I start feeling a little down, I go out and do a completely unselfish act that benefits someone else. It proves that a little love can make someone else feel better about the world and in turn that gives me hope for the world. Doesn't matter what the act is, could be holding the door for someone and flashing them a smile. A simple act like that can warm the coldest of hearts. Then that love comes back to you. You'd be surprised at what he butterfly effect can do.

I didnt think you came off whiny at all. I think what you are feeling is truly legit and may not be easily cured by reading some spiritual book.
There are so many people feeling this same thing,this (whats the point,nothingness) seems like an epidemic lately.
I constantly feel like something is definitely off about the way we are supposed to be. Like a few wires in our brains were crossed the wrong way.
Some are more aware of being "off" that something just isnt right and some are not and can read a book and find their happiness. I wish I myself was not aware of just how wrong and off things are with humans and could find that joy. I feel like I am being suppressed and I dont know by who or how to stop them.
So I hear ya and I sympathize

dude...puberty

That craps not done till you're like 23...some of the most depressed times I had was during puberty. Your body is going nuts inside...don't freak, don't blow your head off...you'll get through it. Also, buy some lithium water, get some sunlight, exercise a little bit, and go lay on the grass....Remember, sometimes there isn't a point...just experience it

I often have that feeling of nothingness. I just sit through the feelings. I don't react to them. I am the type of person that needs alot of alone time. I feel better when I am alone than when I am with alot of people. I feel more centered. I like people but in small doses. I also write out my thoughts in a journal to get the thoughts out of my head. You are not alone.

OK i thought it would revise this in a more positive way so you dont get the wrong idea.

To be happy in life you need to pursue happiness. There is no other way around it. You just cant give up what you want out of life. It all seems meaningless now but things will fall into place for you and for some people it does not even happen till they reach 30, 40 or 50.

I see myself in you when i was your age. Back then i used to ask the same questions. You go through so many experiences that you reflect back on and it feels like its not enough or just a blur but you realise it will all fall into place sooner or later.

If you need someone to talk to you can always u2u me.



[edit on 16-12-2008 by meadowfairy]

As trthskr said you are NOT alone. I know this numb feeling you are having. When I was also 17 I became so numb that I couldn't feel love for my parents anymore. It felt as if they were the same to me as a stranger on the street. Although I KNEW I loved them I just couldn't FEEL anything. I will admit that I resorted to inflicting pain on myself just so I could feel something.

But i'll tell you what there is nothing better than just spending time with someone, and being able to laugh. Spending time with people, real people who's company you enjoy is crucial. Someone who you can laugh with.

I didn't have this and I think that is why I personally became so devoid of emotion.

"In order to get something you've never had, You have to do things you've never done."

Getting rid of this feeling is hard i'm not going to lie to you. You will have to go out and be social when you dont want to be. Take deep breaths, flash a smile and just do it. Never pass up a chance to get out. And most importantly hobbies.

Exercising is crucial when your done you feel great not just because you did something but because your body releases hormones that actually make you FEEL BETTER. So go for a run before bed or in the morn. or do yoga/pilates.

You have to just force through that barrier of pointlessness and just do things.

Dont like to exercise? Gardening it makes you feel good to. Anything where at the end you have accomplished something is good.

I use to tell my self that there was no point, and that I just didn't care about anything. I forced myself to get out there anyway and I just kept that bad attitude, and after a while that feeling started to fade away and once it does you start to feel all those things you thought were missing before.

Anyways if you feel the need u2u me anytime. I dont know if I helped at all but I really hope it does.


Take it easy,
YoungBlood

There's some pretty good advice in this thread. I don't know why As a man Thinketh isn't required reading in schools. I share that little piece every chance I get.

Having said that, I'll just let you know there is no one answer. What works for you may not work for anyone else. And what works for someone else may no resonate with you at all. We all have to find our own path, and it takes longer for some than it does others.

And (not to be a downer) some never find it. The good news is, you're looking for answers. The very fact you're searching puts you head and shoulders above those that can't be bothered to look.

The feelings you're having aren't anything that the vast majority of us don't have at one time or another. And the teen years are particularly susceptible. Call it "teen angst" or "existential crisis", it's not uncommon. And I don't say that to belittle your feelings, but to let you know you're far from alone.

Things change, and sometimes so rapidly that you'll almost suffer whiplash from it. The best thing to do is press on and do the best you can do in the moment.

Read the link from ItsTheQuestion above. Give it some thought. It might not mean anything to you now, so bookmark or print it and read it again in 6 months or a year. You can polish it off in a lunch hour, but contemplate it for life.

Or not.

I'm surprised my thread got this much looking at really. I read the book and i am very thankfull for that link once again thank you ItsTheQuestion.

All the negative and positive feedback i got are all helpfull because i'm very curious on to what everyone has to say on this topic and maybe i looked at this in a different way by thinking i'm 17 what else is there after right now? The only thing i found very comferting was the fact that meadowfairy pointed out people dont find happiness untill 30, 40, 50. As i'm left with this feeling right now I will no longer waste my time dwelling on this feeling rather then trying to open my eyes and look at everything that can remove and keep in mind i have all the time in the world.

hm01cut

Another book you can read and i recommend highly is the ringing cedars series. If you can find it at the library great.

This is just some guys review and if you look on the side of youtube you may find more videos on people talking about it this is the part 2 to the guys review which speaks more about how your are feeling:
au.youtube.com...


Good quote in this video "When the student is ready, the teacher comes"


[edit on 16-12-2008 by meadowfairy]

[edit on 16-12-2008 by meadowfairy]

Originally posted by hm01cut
I'm surprised my thread got this much looking at really. I read the book and i am very thankfull for that link once again thank you ItsTheQuestion.

You're most welcome, grasshopper. As yeahright pointed out, As a Man Thinketh is a classic, worthy of re-reading time and time again.
wash222 said " I think what you are feeling is truly legit and may not be easily cured by reading some spiritual book." I would contend that ALL feelings are "legit"; feelings seem to be the language between the body and the soul, if you will. Listen to them. But also, and this is very important, realize that you are ultimately responsible for them. Meaning that you DO have control over how you feel.

Also, and this is directed to wash222 as well as to you, hm01cut--I was not in any way implying that reading the book I suggested [or any other, for that matter] would "cure" what you're experiencing. Furthermore, there is no need for a "cure" since there is no disease or harmful condition to "cure". The fact that wash222 referred to the book as "some spiritual book" shows that wash222 did not read the book in question. Although I've certainly enjoyed some so-called "spiritual books" and learned from them, As a Man Thinketh is more along the lines of layman's philosophy. For those who haven't read it yet, follow the link in the previous paragraph and give it a read. Much of it seems "obvious," yet even if you're not learning anything new from it, it can help us all to be reminded of important truths from time to time.

All the negative and positive feedback i got are all helpfull because i'm very curious on to what everyone has to say on this topic and maybe i looked at this in a different way by thinking i'm 17 what else is there after right now? The only thing i found very comferting was the fact that meadowfairy pointed out people dont find happiness untill 30, 40, 50. As i'm left with this feeling right now I will no longer waste my time dwelling on this feeling rather then trying to open my eyes and look at everything that can remove and keep in mind i have all the time in the world.

meadowfairy is correct in that it can take some time in life to "find happiness." However, don't limit yourself like that by thinking that you can't or won't be happy for another 13+ years! You can be happy when you simply choose to pursue your happiness, as another poster pointed out.

Many of us obviously can empathize with you, hm01cut. You hang in there and pay close attention to the things in life, however small or mundane they may appear, that bring you a smile and/or pleasant thoughts. Cultivate those experiences, and seek to build on them.

Yes, life can be very, very difficult. The most challenging times, however, are the ones that can teach us the most. And the difficulties you are experiencing right now? They, too, shall pass. Remember that the ONLY thing in this universe that never changes is the fact that everything changes.

Thank you alot ItsTheQuestion i understood what you meant when you suggested the read and a good read at that. You have been very helpfull with this and im very pleased that you gave me such advice as to everyone who took the time to look at my thread. Everything was always right infront of me and it was very obvious but i never thought to look.



Again thank you all.

Never lose hope in your dreams sweetheart and be open about your thoughts as much as you would like too you never know how positive words can change someone or change the direction in your future even for yourself.

Blessings, Peace and love to you!

In my opinion, the mistake many people make is trying to "find happiness," some, as someone here said, never find it or only at 30, 40, 50 years old.

In fact, happiness is not something you FIND; it's something that comes from within. Once you realize that your entire reality is your PERCEPTION of reality, you also realize that you and you alone are responsble for your own happiness.

For some people, the glass is always half empty, for others it's always half full -- it's totally up to you. You can wander through the world and be cynical about everything you see and hear and everyone you meet. Or you walk around in perpetual wonder and amazement about the beauty surrounding you and enjoy every single moment, every ray of sunshine, every flower on the side of the road, and every rainbow.

That has nothing to do with your outer reality... in fact, I remember times when I was deliriously happy -- those were times when I was dirt-poor, was not in love, nor had anything fantastic happen to me in the material world. That happiness came purely from me CHOOSING to be happy; it also helps enormously to go outside and connect with nature whenever you can. Make it a point to pay attention to and admire God's creation; listen to the birds chirping, the insects buzzing, feel a soft breeze in your hair and the sunshine in your face... and just be. Something simple like this is all it takes to be happy if you let it happen. For that, all you need is the inner conviction that miracles are not only possible but that they actually happen... every day. See the meaning in omens in nature, recognize synchronicities and signs from Spirit... and you just entered a world full of magic. You'll never have a dull moment, I promise.

This is all i needed to hear. It turns out everything was always infront of me. Hearing all this advice from completely random people on a website i enjoy just because that reason made me look at it for once. This may be because I'm not surrounded by a group of caring friends or ones who open their eyes. I just forgot how caring, understanding and helpfull humans could be.

I was in the same position as you at 17 for the most part. As great as it sounds, a book didn't change my mind. Actually, I didn't even care about reading, or tv, or games, or anything really. I was distraught that "that's all there is." But that's not true man.

If anything, it sounds like you are on your own path, which I prefer to any other path. The opinions you have are "strange" because they are different, and not filtered by what you think others want to hear. Once you accept yourself as you are, you can start moving forward.

Unfortunately, I think that process is different for everyone.

I find it hard to believe that "there is nothing [you] want to experience" anymore. True, the happy doesn't ever weigh out the sad. But I just look at sad as another experience now. As you said yourself in a way, its unfair to only dwell and recollect on tough times, unless you spent equal time reminiscing and reliving the great times.

I also disagree that there is only content and sad. Emotions are analog, not digital.

I also disagree that music doesn't work out. I've used music as an outlet all my life, and couldn't imagine living without it. Go with that.

[edit on 17-12-2008 by scientist]

Originally posted by sylvie
In my opinion, the mistake many people make is trying to "find happiness," some, as someone here said, never find it or only at 30, 40, 50 years old.

In fact, happiness is not something you FIND; it's something that comes from within. Once you realize that your entire reality is your PERCEPTION of reality, you also realize that you and you alone are responsble for your own happiness.

For some people, the glass is always half empty, for others it's always half full -- it's totally up to you. You can wander through the world and be cynical about everything you see and hear and everyone you meet. Or you walk around in perpetual wonder and amazement about the beauty surrounding you and enjoy every single moment, every ray of sunshine, every flower on the side of the road, and every rainbow.

That has nothing to do with your outer reality... in fact, I remember times when I was deliriously happy -- those were times when I was dirt-poor, was not in love, nor had anything fantastic happen to me in the material world. That happiness came purely from me CHOOSING to be happy; it also helps enormously to go outside and connect with nature whenever you can. Make it a point to pay attention to and admire God's creation; listen to the birds chirping, the insects buzzing, feel a soft breeze in your hair and the sunshine in your face... and just be. Something simple like this is all it takes to be happy if you let it happen. For that, all you need is the inner conviction that miracles are not only possible but that they actually happen... every day. See the meaning in omens in nature, recognize synchronicities and signs from Spirit... and you just entered a world full of magic. You'll never have a dull moment, I promise.

Could have not said it better myself. As i was reading this before there was a double rainbow outside.