posted on Dec, 10 2008 @ 01:48 PM
I can already tell that alot of people here will know what I'm talking about.
Not to sound cocky or full of myself, but it seems as if I'm above the average intelligence level for my age. No, I'm not genius, but I can piece
things together and notice patterns and issues that others so often overlook. Considering my age group, I seem to be one of the few with a clearer
understanding of the world, and some actual morals. I'm 18, and the people I have met around my age have generally been a disgrace. The thing is..is
this a blessing or a curse?
No, I'm no genius, and I wish I were; but more on that after. The thing is, I find my logic seems to run circles around people, and they have a hard
time grasping what I'm trying to say. Add that to my socially crippled personality, and you have some very embarassing and distressful situations.
I'm sure alot of you know how frustrating it is to see something few can see, and when explaining it they simply do not understand what you are
saying. "You lost me" or "You're crazy" or the like.
In other words, I'm a soul looking to advance his knowledge in a world where thought-provoking conversations seem absolutely unheard of, atleast
within my age range. I've met very few in everyday life who I can engage in a thought-provoking and intelligent conversation with. Few who can
understand my points, and throw in their own intelligent opinions. Is intelligence a burden or is it a gift? To be misunderstood constantly, and to be
an outcast just because your interests are different and unique.
I make alot of enemies because I have strong opinions and I know what I like. I know what I want, I know what I enjoy, and always looking for a
thought-provoking conversation, I tend to express them with people who disagree with me for the sake of a mature conversation. However, I almost never
get a mature conversation in return. It's as simple as "You're dumb because youdon't like what I like" to sum it up in simplest terms.
I just don't understand why others around me are incapable of waking up, what is there that we can do? Where can we seek out the information to
expand our minds? Also, how can we use newly found knowledge and not let it be our downfall? I've found knowledge and a clear understanding brings
more pain and misery than one would expect. I can't begin to explain how frustrating it is when someone tries to break down my ego, and my logical
replies to their inaccuracies are complete misses and don't get the point across.
For example; I have only 10 credits in school, yes, laugh as you will, but school is not a direct reflection of intelligence. Numerous things can lead
to one not doing well in school, such as being more the type who wants to learn things first hand, instead of being preached them. Perhaps regular
schedules are hard to maintain, or perhaps the knowledge is there but there's a lack of motivation for unexplainable reasons. For me, it's a mix of
this, and my sleeping issues don't help either. But when one makes the claim that I am "stupid" because I am not in school at the moment, yet
they're the ones fumbling for a dictionary when I meet them with a reply, it just makes my head spin with agony and frustration.
How can we come to terms with this 'blessing', when it rears it's ugly head to be more of a curse?
Does anyone else know what I'm saying?
That's another problem of mine, some days I can explain things incredibly well, and other days I just draw blanks and have trouble explaining them.
This day is certainly the latter, so I hope people made some sense out of that..
What's our purpose in a world full of sheep?