Holiday Skirmish Sign Up Thread

That one grew out of an older and more serious idea I had a while back.

I think that First Lady should be an elected office. Talk about the ultimate check and balance on the president. Originally I was thinking of electing Hillary as Bush's first lady, but it works just as well with a President who I do like. It'd be a great way to blackmail both sides. Obama- do what you promised. Palin, go home. If either one of them hesitates even a little bit, BAM, I now pronounce you a Reality TV Sensation. We'll have Doctor Phil conduct the ceremony just for good measure.

As for how that idea translates into Palin as Mrs. Claus- let's face it, she spent a lot of time convincing us that she's the ultimate female family figure, and just because it turns out that this country doesn't consider that a valid political credential doesn't mean we don't realize that she could really be good for some other institutions that could use a new face. Besides, I'm determined to keep her in the public eye until there's a sex scandal. (Yeah I'm going to hell for saying that, save your breath, I know)

reply to post by The Vagabond

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Well, I won't be the one sending you. As a matter of fact, after your last pronouncement, I would offer to carry you on my shoulders to heaven.

(..stop with the crazy visuals, Fighters. I'm thinking of it more like pall-bearing, but... happy)

I'm all in favor of making Mrs.Claus a MILF .

What a line. I'd love to turn it into a joke to share with you all, but this is a family site and all of the obvious jokes leading to that punch-line involve a blow up doll.

Current List of Fighters:

nyk537
Americandingbat
Heike (paired with TheWayISeeIt by mutual agreement/preference)
TheWayISeeIt (paired with Heike by mutual agreement/preference)
intrepid
schrodingers dog (paired with budski by mutual agreement/preference)
budski (paired with schrodingers dog by mutual agreement/preference)
GAOTU789
Skyfloating
44soulslayer
FSBlueApocalypse (Conditional)
Maxmars
The Vagabond
Ian McLean

14 total for 7 Fights thus far. If the list doesn't continue to gain new Fighters we could start earlier than the 12th.

Keep the topic ideas coming guys. I have a handful as well but they are on my home computer.

Edit to Add: I dig the "one point for participation, plus one for victory" notion...

[edit on 4-12-2008 by MemoryShock]

"Reindeers : A climate conscious powerplant?"

"Should Santa be forced to cough up for antibiotics to treat Rudolph's obvious nose infection?"

"Should Santa continue to have diplomatic immunity against being charged with repeated counts of breaking and entering?"

A few others to come Im sure

reply to post by MemoryShock

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I like that point structure as well. The other thing we could do since it's xmas is have a small ATS point award for the winners.

reply to post by schrodingers dog

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Ranking Points trump ATS points...in my opinion...but it is Christmas...

We shall see.

Now where are your topic contributions...

44soulslayer: Diplomatic Immunity...freaking hilarious...

Have we had "santa is a communist" yet?

"Working rights for elves" and "the working time directive (EU) for Santa"

"Elves vs Leprechauns, who'd win the fight"

"Is Santa a secret paedophile, and if not why does he sneak into childrens rooms in the dead of night in order to grrom them by leaving gifts"

reply to post by MemoryShock

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"Santa is real"

"Do ATS friends have to send gifts to each other"

"Festivus is better than christmas"

Mine may have gotten lost in the FCP so I'll re-post them here. BTW, I was FIRST with the elf slavery type thing.

Santa's elves need a labor union.

There's no such thing as a tacky Christmas decoration - it's the spirit that counts.

Where'd the red and green come from, anyway? Christmas colors should be white and blue!

Santa's reindeer are fake!

Ban real Christmas trees! Killing a living thing is not in the spirit of Christmas.

Santa doesn't use chimneys any more, since most places don't have them. But there is an entry point that nearly all homes have - the toilet!

Santa Claus: not a name but a hereditary title.

Everyone should be able to get free anti-anxiety medications during the Holidays.

We should use emerging weather-control technology to ensure everyone a White Christmas.

Snowmen should have endangered species status and be protected by law from melting.

Deer hunting season shouldn't be during Christmas!

Some kids don't get gifts from Santa because the reindeer are afraid to go to their house.

Santa's home isn't at the North Pole, it's inside the hollow Earth whose entrance is at the North Pole.

Santa's home is at the SOUTH Pole - lots of those penguins are magickally disguised elves.

Candy canes are designed after the fancy colorful fish hooks used to catch mermaids.

Christmas advertising and decorating should not start until AFTER Thanksgiving.

It's politically incorrect (gender insensitive) to put blue balls on a Christmas tree.

You shouldn't have a fire in your fireplace on Christmas Eve.

If you hang up dirty socks, you get better presents.

Everyone should just give money for Christmas and boycott the commercialism and shopping bedlam.

Coal in your stocking means the oil industry is after you for trying to develop alternative energy.

Edited to add some new ones.


[edit on 4-12-2008 by Heike]

"Dreidels are fun for christians too"

"Rudolph has a drug problem"

reply to post by schrodingers dog

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I'd love to argue that Festivus is better than Christmas.

Err, count me in. I love festive debates. I'm more than willing to argue whether or not Santa exists, and Terry Pratchett will bolster my source lists.

Being that this idea has been released now, I'd like to go ahead and call dibs on this topic, arguing the pro position if I could. I'm not sure if picking topics and positions is allowed for the skirmishes.

Doesn't have to be against you, but I think that debate would be a blast.

Any takers?

reply to post by intrepid

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mustn't succumb to impulse ..... humor overpowering morals...., help!

reply to post by Maxmars

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I bet that lolli tastes devine. I could lick that for at least five minutes.
I know, I spoil'em.

Edit to add possible debate topic: "How long is long enough?"




[edit on 12/4/2008 by schrodingers dog]

Ok so far I have only been able to offer easy wins by default to others... BUT I WILL NOT GIVE UP! I just hope to get a better topic rather than trying to defend NWO ideas again... I hate the Corporate NWO idea please god stop makeing me defend it. Yuk.

BUt yeah I am all in!

I'm seeing a lot of evidence here for the latest analysis of the male brain: