International Con Man Barack Obama Leaves U.S. With $85 Million In Campaign Fundraising

International Con Man Barack Obama Leaves U.S. With $85 Million In Campaign Fundraising

www.theonion.com

CHICAGO—In a devastating blow to millions of unsuspecting Americans, newly elected president and international con man Barack Obama fled the country Wednesday with nearly $85 million in campaign funds.

According to FBI investigators, Obama's sudden disappearance was discovered at 6:15 p.m. when the former Illinois senator failed to arrive at a gala event in Lincoln Square, prompting several aides to rush back to his campaign headquarters. At 6:23 p.m., flight logs at O'Hare International Airport confirmed that two passengers, a male carrying two silver briefcases and dressed in a perfectly tailored Brioni tuxedo, and an African-American female wearing a fur coat and speaking in a thick Russian accent, were seen boarding a private plane.

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Click to read the note left behind by Obama, in which he claims the American public "never stood a chance."
Obama's campaign office, sources said, was completely vacant aside from a discarded Abraham Lincoln portrait, behind which was an emptied safe that his aides claimed never to have seen before.

(visit the link for the full news article)

Wow! This must be all over t.v. Heres a possibility of what is really going on. Maybe Obama is working for bin ladin in an attempt to change the statue of liberty to a statue of jim jones holding a cup of grape drink. Shortly after they will be beemed away by alien spacecrafts and cut a deal with the prime minister of north korea to promote chicken in japan.

www.theonion.com
(visit the link for the full news article)

Is this just a fictional view of a possible future scenario or is this for real?

Please tell me you guys arn't serious. TheOnion is a spoof news site, they're faker than The Daily Show and the reporters on the scene.

theonion is a real site, and its stories are %100 percent true.

The Onion is a parody/comedy news site and certainly not to be taken seriously.
Misleading thread title and content...although the dash of humor is certainly welcome around here.

how do you know theonion is not real?

The onion is a real site alright, but it's stories are totally untrue. It's a spoof site. I hope no one takes this seriously.

Originally posted by mls11.11
how do you know theonion is not real?

The Onions I put in my food are real.
The Onion is a real newspaper and website- but it is a spoof/parody site. Well known fact.

Originally posted by mls11.11
theonion is a real site, and its stories are %100 percent true.

so that's why they say Mrs. Mcain is an alien who says that Oprah Winfrey is most pleasant in her fattened state?

The Onion is a parody/humor news site, I've fell for one of their articles and posted it here in the breaking news forum too before I realized that.

Just look at some of the headlines for their articles!

The Onion

Cavaliers Declared NBA Champions As Basketball Knocks Off Early

First Openly Gay Racehorse To Compete Sunday

Bush Tumbles Wildly Down Washington Monument Staircase

New Texas Legislation Would Require Whiskey Bottles To Be Shot Out Of Air Immediately After Being Emptied

Ford Reintroduces Model T Line That Made It Great

Illegal Immigrants Returning To Mexico For American Jobs

CIA: Syria Harboring More Than 15 Million Known Arabs

Area Woman Hates Self For Hating Fat Woman For Ordering Cake

Study Finds Working At Work Improves Productivity

U.S. Holds Going-Out-Of-Business Sale

New Little Caesars Marketing Strategy Has Employees Throw Themselves On Hoods Of Passing Cars

Johnson & Johnson Introduces 'Nothing But Tears' Shampoo To Toughen Up Newborns

Dollar Bill On Floor Sends Wall Street Into Frenzy

Study: Not Being An Asshole Boss May Boost Employee Moral

It's all parody/humor, but it is pretty well done and even looks like a news website. The Onion seems to catches people who didn't know this off guard all the time, it's all just in the name of fun!

[edit on 11/13/2008 by Keyhole]

i can hear you guys are saying its a parody or its a comical website, but where is the proof?

reply to post by mls11.11


Where is the proof that it's not a joke site?

this is a conspiracy website, so in this particular situation we are safe to judge that everything is a conspiracy until proven otherwise, so for the sake of conpiracy knowledge and none other i request to know if the onion is a parody or a conspiracy of truth given to us as a spoof this is not a legal documentation just a website conspiracy board to those of you well educated hypocritical type, (no offense to the educated non-hyprocritical).

reply to post by mls11.11

You want proof?

Okay here's proof right on their website

The Onion is a satirical newspaper published by Onion, Inc.

www.theonion.com...

how do you know that statement is not a conspiracy???

reply to post by mls11.11


I see where you are coming from but there are some things in life that are not conspiracy. Some things are just what they are without any hidden agenda behind them. The onion has no hidden agenda. It just spins the news. How do I know there wasn't some conspiracy behind it? I don't but it's safe to assume that.

it was safe for jews to assume they were safe in germany but that turned out to be quite the contrary, if you can not supply me with physical proof, (photos, video documentary, polygraph exams) i am going to assume the worst, but only for purposes of revieling conpiracies and not for any conspiracy against conspiracies.

reply to post by mls11.11

I think you're onto something.

You've got me thinking... when isn't there a hidden agenda for something?

Education was made not to educate the masses but to make them able to have jobs...

Flouride was put into water... why?

Does the news really try to inform us about what's going on or does it only tell us what we want to know?

What isn't a conspiracy?

yes maybe we have some sort of spiritual power that is being used by aliens like on dark city.