My Dearest Friends,

I have found a questionnaire which I know has helped me with my doubts. It is from "A Wanderer's Handbook".

I cannot vouch for its accuracy or otherwise.

For what it's worth, I scored 90 points.

Here it is:

Questionnaire

Your Childhood

1. Did you often think about, daydream, or fantasize about aliens, UFOs, or other worlds?

2. Did you feel like ordinary things around you were somehow strange, like the human body, the color of the sky, trees and nature, human architecture, and adults?

3. Did you ever feel as if your parents were not your real parents, that you had a missing brother or sister, or a home some place far away?

4. Did you have magical dreams of flying, invisible spirit friends, or receiving special guidance and protection?

5. Did you look up at the night sky with longing, and sometimes say: “Take me home … Why am I here?” or ask “Why am I so alone?”

Your Personality

6. Are you kind, gentle, peaceful, and non-aggressive—not just sometimes, but almost always?

7. Are you hurt, saddened, and confused by all the human evil and cruelty in the world?

8. Do you feel that money, possessions, and a successful career are not really that important?

9. Do you sometimes feel more comfortable with plants and animals than with people?

10. Are you generally sensitive, considerate, generous, and concerned about others around you?

Your Experiences

11. Have you felt different, out-of-place, or somewhat alienated from human society all your life?

12. Have you had dreams, visions, or sightings of UFOs that inspired real spiritual growth?

13. Have you had dramatic dreams of Earth changes, geological and social upheaval, the end of the world, or future civilization?

14. Are you logical, scientific, non-emotional, and somewhat confused by hot passion and desire?

15. Have you had a clear and uplifting contact with benevolent, kind, and highly-evolved beings?

Your Interests

16. Are you interested in science fiction, epic fantasy, angels, high-technology, and world prophecy?

17. Are you interested in Atlantis, Lemuria, channeling, pyramids, New Age ideas and UFOs?

18. Are you interested in meditation, alternative healing, or bringing love and light to the world?

19. Do you believe human society is ignorant of the spiritual truths that you know to be true?

20. Do you have a strong sense of purpose and feel that your mission is to help Earth and humanity?

Scoring Your Identity

For each YES answer, give yourself 5 points and then total your score. (For every “somewhat” answer, give yourself 3 points.)

100-75 points:
You definitely fit the wanderer profile, but perhaps you are not surprised!

75-25 points:
You may or may not be a wanderer, and you need more reflection to know for sure.

25-00 points:
You probably are not a wanderer, but why are you interested in these matters?

im a pretty normal guy, but i have always felt like i was suppose to be a part of something big, i have always been afraid to admit it.

i also get the feeling that i want to go home sometimes, even when i am home.

its like wanting to turn around and look behind you, but you cant. you feel something behind you, but it is hidden. all we see is what we see.

EDIT for sausage fingers


[edit on 13-11-2008 by pureevil81]

I call empathy my beautiful curse. It was something I had no understanding of up until about the past year. Even in previous passing through spiritual awareness, it wasn't something I ever heard discussed. It brought me so much pain at times that I literally prayed for death. Not just people, but places and things. It drove me mad.

Now I understand a little better which makes it easier to deal with. But I, like others, have had to sacrifice friends and family for the sake of my sanity and emotional well-being. Not sad at all as it is what I've needed to do to maintain. The truth is, I feel better when I'm not around them.

To the point, I visited a friend last week that I hadn't seen in almost a year. While in his house I felt like I was being crushed, that death was breathing on my neck. I can't tell him that since I know he wouldn't have the slightest understanding (Not a judgment, but the truth as I have known him to be for over 12 years). He doesn't seem to notice, or is unwilling to do anything about it. I know it is his life, and so he must live it.

But of course I'll be there for him and the rest should they really need me. Which is to say not simply to wallow in their misery with them, but to help them out of it. It may not come to pass, but who am I to say.

If there's anything anyone feels I can help with, feel free to U2U me or ask on this thread.

I am not sure that it is about "doing". I feel it is more about "being".

It is your Path my Sister. Listen for that which resonates with you. No one here is qualified to tell you what you need to do.

Peace Out

Traveller

Originally posted by traveller
Perhaps my awareness could be improved.

Or perhaps you are aware to a point where it doesn't matter. I've found that I've come to a point where the only "teacher" I know is myself, the me above me. Books, music, general chatter etc. are what we use to hear the voice when we can't hear it otherwise, which is what makes communication so invaluable. This is how we "resonate" with each other. It is the same for all of us.

It isn't even teaching as much as it is remembering.

I know how all of you feel becaus ive had alot of those dreams and feelings aswell. Ive had alot of strange dreams that always have somthing important to show me. First i had to understand that i was feeling other peoples emotions. Then i had to control my anger about other peoples blindness. Then i had to learn that giving somone knowledge that they didnt earn is bad. Now Im dealing with walking that thin line between teaching somone and rapeing them of valuble experiances. Like picking which log is the right size to finnaly let drop on their head for educational purposes.

i can connect with what some of you guys are reporting.

3 blue orbs in a triangle pointing down in my living room at age 3.

a woman i did not know walked up and told me she wanted to sing my songs. my songs are private and few even know i write them.

many poltergeistic happenings around me

empathy can be very powerful when you are in sales. it's as if you communicate to others in their own voice. always became disillusioned with materialism. abhor negativity. not in sales now after being very successful for a bit.


recently, i started closing my circle and not allowing selfish manipulative people near me. that is a mistake. these people are really enamored by me, but i am tired of hearing the same old, " i'd be happy, if only i had ten million dollars routine" oh and it's ok if you leave a thousand carcasses strewn across your trail getting there, cuz bein rich is all there is and it's your ultimate destiny, regardless of the consequences to others. lot of people are startin to sound the same, but the circle is getting too small.



also i hear music--as if it is coming from the universe or through sacred geometry or something. once it was so loud in the car, i reached for the radio to turn it down, but the radio was not on.






[edit on 14-11-2008 by ogbert]

I'd like to thank everyone who has posted to this thread thus far. Not all for your words but rather the emotional content I find. From that I doubt I need to tell any of you how hard a road this can be.

I can't say it has renewed my sense of purpose, but it has allowed me to feel again that I may have a little to share. I hope I come across as earnestly as I feel, and far less pretentious than I fear I might.

But it's not about me, rather a sincere thanks.

One Light, One Love.

you all seem so confident of having purpose and positive about your experiences. i must admit to being less so.

i sometimes have doubts, does anyone else experience doubts? you guys ever feel like your just going nut's?

also, i must admit that i often get tetchy if i feel someone is drawing a little to heavily on my attention. do any of you experience this.

EDIT:i often feel i understand the motives people have more deeply than the person acting, but i'm not sure if thats projection or paranoia or reality. opinions?

[edit on 14/11/08 by pieman]

Originally posted by pieman
you all seem so confident of having purpose and positive about your experiences. i must admit to being less so.

i sometimes have doubts, does anyone else experience doubts? you guys ever feel like your just going nut's?

Interesting post. You may get more confidence if you stop comparing yourself with other people in your surroundings. Personally, the moment i did that it changed for the better. We might not have the dog-eat-dog mentality needed to be the top dog in the world as it is today but to be honest i would not want to have it any other way.

The feeling of going nuts is normal because whenever you seem the odd one out and everybody around you is having fun with/is involved in things you are not interested in and vice versa. When you percieve things that seem to shout out at you but the rest is oblivious about it you may feel you are going crazy while it may be you are one of the few who are not crazy. This quote sums it up quite nicely "Insanity - a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world." - RD Laing, psychiatrist and author (1927-1989). And alas we may not be adjusted

So, just keep on trucking on and everything will be ok.

Please don't worry about what you are meant to be doing. Go about your life as you normally would, assuming any of you have anything going on that *is* normal! lol! I sure don't...

The only necessary thing right now is to raise your vibration. I know it sounds New Age and stupid but it is truly the single most important thing you can and must do throughout this process. If we perform no other function in our life otherwise, this is essential for moving things in the right direction and making this thing as painless as possible. And it won't be painless in any case so do your best. We're acting as a kind of anti-friction system for the ascension. Do this because of your empathy, because of your compassion, because it's your duty.

And listen to the music. I have to ask people all the time if there really is music somewhere or am I just "imagining" it. lol

Oh yes, pay attention to your dreams too.

And when you get around to it, practise telepathy, please? Contact me that way once you can do it. U2U if you aren't making the connection otherwise. I've been ready for some time and am anxiously awaiting connection with others!