Originally posted by Blue_Jay33
reply to post by amazed
From that point view you are correct about the power aspect.
Certain situations are more likely to lead to a man using his physical power to overcome and rape a woman than others.
Too much to drink for example and being around scantly clad women all evening, might make a man behave differently than if he was sober and around
women in winter cloths. Certain visuals create micro sexual tension, that keep adding up, and a mans self control becomes more challanged as this
happens.
On the physical power, the point is taken, that is obvious. The mental part is a completely different story.
One rapist said he literally lost his mind for a few moments, he never understood what came over him in that moment. But it is a choice, a choice that
gives into the dark side of depravity and evil.
However there is an overwhelming overriding embedded force that compels most men to fulfill their biological destiny by mating with women, some men
literally lose their minds to fulfill that destiny, whatever the cost.
Rape is the ultimate cost to the man and even more so the poor victim.
There is no excuse for evil like this, none. It is wrong 100% of the time.
I am just trying to explain it. And if you understand the nature of sin and it's full scope you gain further insight as well.
I had to do a ton of research on this once when a friend got date raped a few years back, it was so tragic and sad. But it gave me a better
understanding that I never had before.
I'm sorry no, a man drinking and a woman in scanty clothing does not MAKE a man do anything. Again, he chooses to do harm, no matter what the
situation, it is a choice. You can put the name "evil" or whatever you want on it, but the man made the choice because it was within his
personality to, meaning he has a need for "power over" another.
I understand one thing, a man that would choose to rape while drunk, would choose to do so while sober if he felt he could get away with it, and
possibly has or will commit rape while sober.
I do not understand the mentality of people who feel that they have to give men an excuse for rape. Their is no excuse, drunk, sober, horny or a
million other excuses. It is a choice that is made and it is a choice that causes harm to another.
You also misunderstood my statement and that is, even in the situation you described, underneath all this rapist excuses, his action of rape is about
power, not just about sex.
Rape, is always in any example you can come up with, in the end about power over another person, never about sex ie: orgasm, you can have an orgasm by
masturbating.
A man's self control can be "challenged" for weeks and months and years and for a lifetime and he still not rape a woman, it is the man that for
some reason "needs" that power over another that in the end will use any excuse, she was scantily clad, I was drinking, I had not had sex in blah
blah long, it is still a choice that HE makes. A rapist CHOOSES to cause harm to another, no matter what, the person getting raped never FORCES a man
to rape her.
Do you really think, a rapist would tell you that he knew exactly what he was doing? Come on, give me a break, and really do some research on the
subject please, it's people with ideas like yours that give rapist an excuse.
What is with people who want to blame the woman instead of the rapist who chooses to harm her? It is called "blaming the victim", its easier to do,
easier to change a victim that to change a rapist. I am sorry that your friend was raped, I sure hope she had someone with a better understanding of
these things than you who she could count on.
Edited to add a link discussing the "blaming the victim mentality"
en.wikipedia.org...
People who believe that the world has to be fair may find it hard or impossible to accept a situation in which a person is unfairly and badly hurt.
This leads to a sense that, somehow, the victim must have surely done 'something' to deserve their fate. Another theory entails the need to protect
one's own sense of invulnerability. This inspires people to believe that rape only happens to those who deserve or provoke the assault (Schneider et
al., 1994). This is a way of feeling safer. If the potential victim avoids the behaviors of the past victims then they themselves will remain safe and
feel less vulnerable.
[edit on 3-11-2008 by amazed]
