A friend of mine died of cancer today: It is a blessing to know you're terminal....

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posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:41 PM
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Hi ATS I am going to ramble a bit because I'm a little bit sad.

I got the news that one of my friends died of cancer a few hours ago. I'm very sad to see him go but glad at the same time, becaue he was tired of the pain, and so ready to go.

Let me share some of my thoughts I've had regarding this.

My friend knew that he was going to die and had accepted that. He had "given up" but was far from hopeless. In fact he was ready to go, and even excited.

It makes me think about how much time and effort most of us spend denying our own mortality, even fearing it.

I think it is truly a blessing to know that you are dying, and die consciously. My friend had the time to come to a position of spiritual peace, to set his affairs in order, to tell his family and friends how much he loved them.

How many people will never experience that, because they are too busy pretending they are immortal?

How many people are going to die suddenly and spend their last moments on earth thinking "No! Not now!"

How many people are going to regret that they died with something unsaid, or with some grudge still hanging over them?

We're all going to die someday. For some of us there is no tomorrow. Frank Herbert wrote that "To suspect one's mortality is absolute terror, but to know it absolutely is absolute power."

I swear to God, the fear of death is one of the most crippling things ever thrown before mankind.

Come to peace with your own mortality, and you will find true freedom...




posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:48 PM
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Very sorry your friend passed away. From what you wrote, he found a spiritual peace that helped him get through his passing.

That's how I want to go. I don't want to fear death. I want to be excited knowing that I'll finally get all the answers to life and whatever comes after.

My condolences to you.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:49 PM
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Originally posted by asmeone2


I swear to God, the fear of death is one of the most crippling things ever thrown before mankind.

Come to peace with your own mortality, and you will find true freedom...


I couldnt agree more. Fear is the root of all evil, and we fear nothing more than non-existence.

Great post. I am glad your friend made peace with death. Not everyone terminal does. Often the pain has to beat them down, it isnt a conscious letting go.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:52 PM
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In all of the days of my crazy and often turbulent life I have come to one divine realization that always seems to put my mind at ease.


The realization that death is not to be feared, in fact death is the easiest part of life. All things which live must come to an end. It is, in fact, life that is the hard part.

Living for 50 more years is far more frightening than death could ever be.


I am genuinely sorry to read about the loss of your friend. Take comfort in the fact that they were ready to leave this life and honor them in death by remembering the good that they shared while here.

Peace and serenity unto you.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:54 PM
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Originally posted by Clark W. Griswold
Very sorry your friend passed away. From what you wrote, he found a spiritual peace that helped him get through his passing.

That's how I want to go. I don't want to fear death. I want to be excited knowing that I'll finally get all the answers to life and whatever comes after.

My condolences to you.



Thank you.

He became a Christian as he was going through his chemotherapy, while I have my qualms with the religion I was very glad to see that it truly helped him find peace.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:56 PM
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I couldnt agree more. Fear is the root of all evil, and we fear nothing more than non-existence.

Great post. I am glad your friend made peace with death. Not everyone terminal does. Often the pain has to beat them down, it isnt a conscious letting go.


It is a hard thing to accept. I think beyond not existing any more, we as a species fear that we will never be remembered, and so many people at the end of their lives thing "I could have done more..." but in the end we will all be forgoten, and that in and of itself is a comforting thing.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 10:57 PM
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reply to post by BlackOps719
 


Thank you BO. I had some personal experiences that made me let go of my fear of death. While i certainly don't encourage it I look forward to it in some ways and I hope I will have the opportunity to die consciously.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:06 PM
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I have had two cancer scares this past year which caused me to really consider what matters to me. It turned out I did not have cancer, but all those weeks and even months of tests while I waited to find out - what an eye-opener, that's for sure. I found out that I was NOT living as though what I thought mattered to me, really mattered to me at all.

It was very stressful, but I am glad that I wend through it. It was like a trial run, if you will.

Now I have an opportunity to get it right.

So sorry for the loss of your friend. Glad that you are able to see blessing in it all.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:10 PM
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reply to post by OuttaHere
 


I am glad you are healthy.

I'm stuck in thinking about how in-denial, how in-the-moment our culture is about dying... we absolutely cannot accept that it happens...the only mention of it at all is "you have to do this to get to heaven!"... it is such a sad thing.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:11 PM
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I am very sorry about your friend.

I also hope to 'get over' this fear of the unknown. Actually, I think I do know what's there, I just haven't given myself permission to accept it.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:16 PM
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Thank you, I am sure you will come to acceptance if that is truly what you desire, though for some, the actual experience is difficult...



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:37 PM
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Hate that for you. I've lost friends too, and they cannot be replaced. Just be thankful you had them, even for a while.

One more thing.

We're all terminal.

No one gets out alive.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:41 PM
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reply to post by dooper
 


Oh yes, I realize that fully.

I meant "terminal" in the sense of having a diagnosis that allows you to know, with relative accuracy, when you will die. Versus dying suddenly in some sort of accident or medical tragedy.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:47 PM
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there's not enough people on earth that take one moment out once a year to tell their cherished and loved ones that they love them and care for them.

that guy that brags to his co-workers that his wife bought him $3,000. cuff links, the other guy that is only worried about upgrading his home in an exclusive neighborhood in san francisco, seemingly never stop to think about anything but themselves.

kudos to your friend and his passage. life's quantifiable and people should take the time out daily to enjoy their loved ones. not just at christmas or valentine's day...

i recently went to hug my step father, and he pushed me away. he's too manly to see the bigger picture.

god speed to your friend.

[edit on 10/29/2008 by zooplancton]

[edit on 10/29/2008 by zooplancton]



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:48 PM
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Originally posted by asmeone2


Thank you.

He became a Christian as he was going through his chemotherapy, while I have my qualms with the religion I was very glad to see that it truly helped him find peace.





I have definite qualms about Chemotherapy, but I'm truly glad Christianity helped him to find peace



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:54 PM
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reply to post by Dock6
 


He has a family and children... I think he felt like he wanted to stay around for them, specifically.



posted on Oct, 29 2008 @ 11:55 PM
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reply to post by zooplancton
 


It is very sad how much our desire to be "macho" or whatever keeps us from the important things.



posted on Oct, 30 2008 @ 12:05 AM
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I think (from personal experience) .. that the more crippling and heart wrenching perspective.. is held from the loved ones of the person who is dying.

They're the ones that are going to be alive and aware of the pain the dying person experienced.

And they have to experience living on and loosing and missing them.


-



posted on Oct, 30 2008 @ 12:08 AM
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reply to post by prevenge
 


I would agree.

It doesn't matter to the dead what they leave behind, what their family feels, what happens to their body.

The funerary customs are for the living.



posted on Oct, 30 2008 @ 12:45 AM
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I don't fear death at all. I know for a fact it is not the end. Hard thing to prove, but when more people accept it and it becomes very mainstream to be open about it, people will be more at ease with just being. I suspect that if we were ever to be able to teach our children en masse that when your body dies, your consciousness lives on, that it would be a lot harder to control people and make them do meaningless crap for piss wage an hour while making somebody else rich and powerful, harder to make them fight a war which really doesn't seem relevent if there's nothing to win or lose.... I wish I could say "rest assured" to you, but there's two things that prevents me from just acting like it's no big deal:

1) losing close friends is kind of a bummer either way, mortal or immortal.

2) nobody except you will ever be able to teach you how to be comfortable with death.

Too bad there's so many things locking our minds into vices. I think we're just so bombarded with STUFF, now now now hurry hurry hurry bill bill bill notice warning danger war famine death aids the #ing economy vote the puppet on the right or the puppet on the left (RIP Bill Hicks) yada yada yada.... I have no doubt that some very evil forces who believe they are gods are managing the menagerie from hell... and it's great to hear it when people can just let go and die peacefully, instead of buying into all the atheist materialist bull# and spending their final days waiting in physical and emotional agony and being paralyzed with fear as they slip away. I can imagine that is the worst way to go... in fear.

So, I'm pretty sure your friend went somewhere very peaceful. I believe that
how you feel about death most definitely affects the outcome of your afterlife... because if you fear death so much, what have you REALLY learned in life? I thik also that if your too arrogantly confident that "I'm going to heaven and will have 27 virgins and look like Krishna and hang out with Jesus and the Muses, and we'll be best friends because I am the one and only God amongst men." then you might be not so pleasantly surprised where you end up, either... because you haven't learned anything, either... or you listened to too many other influences.

Death is just a transition. The best possible thing to do is never worry about it. Live life like you're making your own epic screenplay, and don't compromise your vision with fear. This is what we all have to learn. We can't live in slavery to unimportant bull# for the benefit of a couple of fat cat scumbags on top our whole existence as a race. We've got break our minds free. It doesn't take evolution or a whole lotta time when all the knowledge you need is within you already and you just need to be allowed to remember it.

I say every one of us on this site become public speakers and just tell people the truth as we see it. It doesn't have to be perfect, but I believe we all have a piece of the puzzle and we just gotta throw it out there.

I'm happy to hear your friend was at peace, but sad to hear he had to go. Best wishes.





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