This Is The Way It's Mean To Be.....Destiny....

When I was in primary school, grade 1, i started thinking about life. Where I was going, what i wanted, how life plays out, what to expect, etc.

Well when I was in grade 1, I started thinking that I when I was older I would have to move away from y parents, I couldn't have them controlling me, I should have nothing controlling me. I should have no restrictions what so ever. I'm going to be something that the world will need. I'm going to do something important that the world will need. Maybe not to many people, not to people who have been close to me my whole life, but i'm going to do something that will change some people's lives and will help them out a lot.

Like I am meant to do something in my life, and to do this I must move away from my family, parents, sister, relatives. I absolutely cannot get restricted by them. I have to move away from them. Ever since them I have still have these feelings of I must move away from all family relatives. I must be out there alone by myself. Free of any restrictions.

And now I can see it playing out in my life. I'm moving away from all my relatives. I dont want anything to do with them. I do, but i dont, I feel like i must move away from them, stay away from them, have nothing to do with them, get rid of them, get them out of my life.


I dont know how else to put it.

I'm just wondering if anyone else out there has had these thought's, and if anyone's actually seeing events like this paying out in thier day to day life like i am. I'm talking about relatives, family, close relatives.

I cant explain it any other way than I feel something is meant to happen in the future, something big, and it's fate that i'm meant to be moving away from all my relatives that i've ever known....

[Edited on 27-3-2004 by DaRAGE]

And yes i know how sad it souns to some of you who love relatives, family, and i know t's sad to those poeple, it's even sad to me a bit, but i feel like this must be done no matter who is hurt in my family. Even if they dont want to lose contact of me, that they must because this is something I must do and that has to happen! :/

Like it's my destiny.......

[Edited on 27-3-2004 by DaRAGE]

this would be more effective if you made the title "This is the way it's meant to be. Destiny"

Wow I'm in pretty much the same situation. I moved 3,000 miles away from my family. I understand exactly how you feel. It's like the thought of being around these people, and feeling connected to them simply because we share some DNA is ridiculous. I have family out here too, but I refuse to have anything to do with them.

DaRage, I know exactly what you are talking about... I get criticized quite frequently by my GF about my 'family values'.

Basically, my family is big on 'do what you have to do, just let us know every once in awhile that you are still alive'.

Right now my GF is what is holding me back from doing whatever it is that I'm supposed to be doing (although she pushes me in other areas... mostly areas that are non-productive to the end result, though...).

I've thought about it quite often, and have come to a non-definite conclusion that I must be away from anyone who would criticize me for my doings and beliefs so as not to bias and taint the end goal.

Do you also feel the urge to collaborate and/or make friends with people who have like-mindedness to you? To find social circles of people who harbor the same ideas as you do?

I may have something for ya, DaRage... check your U2U's.

*EDIT: LMAO!!! I forgot... you were the one who sent me the links I was gonna forward to you! (slaps forhead)... Indigo

[Edited on 28-3-2004 by Earthscum]

Originally posted by Earthscum
DaRage, I know exactly what you are talking about... I get criticized quite frequently by my GF about my 'family values'.

Basically, my family is big on 'do what you have to do, just let us know every once in awhile that you are still alive'.

Right now my GF is what is holding me back from doing whatever it is that I'm supposed to be doing (although she pushes me in other areas... mostly areas that are non-productive to the end result, though...).

I've thought about it quite often, and have come to a non-definite conclusion that I must be away from anyone who would criticize me for my doings and beliefs so as not to bias and taint the end goal.

Do you also feel the urge to collaborate and/or make friends with people who have like-mindedness to you? To find social circles of people who harbor the same ideas as you do?

I may have something for ya, DaRage... check your U2U's.

*EDIT: LMAO!!! I forgot... you were the one who sent me the links I was gonna forward to you! (slaps forhead)... Indigo

[Edited on 28-3-2004 by Earthscum]

Do you think I could get those links please?

Originally posted by Charlatan
this would be more effective if you made the title "This is the way it's meant to be. Destiny"

I'll do the damn title how I want to do the damn title.

Originally posted by Earthscum
DaRage, I know exactly what you are talking about... I get criticized quite frequently by my GF about my 'family values'.

Basically, my family is big on 'do what you have to do, just let us know every once in awhile that you are still alive'.

Right now my GF is what is holding me back from doing whatever it is that I'm supposed to be doing (although she pushes me in other areas... mostly areas that are non-productive to the end result, though...).

I've thought about it quite often, and have come to a non-definite conclusion that I must be away from anyone who would criticize me for my doings and beliefs so as not to bias and taint the end goal.

Do you also feel the urge to collaborate and/or make friends with people who have like-mindedness to you? To find social circles of people who harbor the same ideas as you do?

I may have something for ya, DaRage... check your U2U's.

*EDIT: LMAO!!! I forgot... you were the one who sent me the links I was gonna forward to you! (slaps forhead)... Indigo

[Edited on 28-3-2004 by Earthscum]

Yeah thanks for that U2U. And yes you did forget about the links...i forget to ask for for them too

I can relate to what ur saying and from that U2U u sent me. It's nearly identical to what goes on in my mind aslo. I've had that feeling for a long time now too....And i guess that is related a bit too of why I feel i must move away from all relatives too...


Why is that we we are pushing ourselves away from our families? Why is it that we feel like there is some future event that we are going to be needed for and therefore need to be away from our family. Away from restrictions or people who will judge us, restrict us or hold us down.

And yes i find it much easier to talk to people who have the same sort of ideas as I, the same like-mindednesss, but no i dont go out and search for them.

About the family thing.

It's like i must move away from my family and basically have no or very very very little contact with them. So i can live my life the way i want without having them worrying about me or me worrying about them, and so that i can do things how i want to do it, when i want to do it, without any restrictions or having to do pretty much anything with my family.

I've thougth about it and I feel that if i have them in my life, my life isn't going right, isn't going the way it's meant to, i'm not meant to have them in my life and i cant have them in my life. I have to have no real contact with them because that's just how it's meant to be and that's how i must have it in the future. And if in the future it's not like that and i have family contact then that has to chagne and i MUST do something about it because that ISN'T how it's meant to be for me. Like I'm destined to do this and if i dont then i must make it happen. I dont know why i feel this way, I dont know why it feels like this is what must happen, and i must make it happen. And i've thought this since grade 1 in primary school. And i'm just seeing it playing out b4 my eyes, me starting to distance myself from my family and relatives, even if it hurts them deep down inside.


Anywyas it's good to see that some poeple can relate to this and think the same thing & act in the same way. It's not just me...

See, I'd prefer to have nothing to do with my family, for the most part b/c there are things I'd like to do with my life, but I know that I have to keep in touch...

My dad admitted to me, once, that if it had been me that died, and not my sister, that he didn't think he'd have survived. I'm the only living daughter, and the oldest child. I have responsibilities, but God, I long to be free. I can't be free with them. But he won't be whole without me...

I do have a friend, however, that is like that. He has no purpose here, and wants everything out of his life--I think I night send him to this sometime--if I can ever convince him to come here. SIGH.

I'm glad this topic has been topped again by you jlc163.

I've been thinking about this again recently....

And i know how to do it.... i just have to be brave enough to do it, and smart enough to do it...

The only thing i hate about this is i have got a new job recently and my parents/family know where i work...

If i am to truely do this....
I would have to get a new job, not tell my parents/sister, move out of home without telling my sister where i am going or parents...(this would be easy enough pretty much... (not the job bit...), but that is easy enough in it's own right..get a new job, dont tell anyone, moveout of home when my sister aint home....

Get a new mobile plan/number... (currently pre-paid...i need a plan neways..)...

Apart from that..the only way that they would be able to find me would be, my sister (and how embarassing...my mum and dad), through my sister... coming down to a club that i go to with my friends every about 2 weeks...2 find me, ask me why, and generally make me feel bad for something that i want/feel the absolute NEED to have done, in my life.

neways...ciao...

As I have yet to meet peopel who can see the whole of their lives, I suspect that after the particular thing that needs to be taken care of IS taken care of, the desire to find family comes back again...

Also, there are those who were meant to live ALONE, even without friends. There's always been a part of me that wnats to move into the woods and never come back--it would means survivalist training first. As long as the ghosties leave me alone, I wouldn't mind not seeing a soul again, wandering the world with nothing around--though instead of suffering throught death, I'd probably take my life, when I am about 80.

It's just not practical...yet.

What is it that you'd like to do?

Who said "we are all actors on the stage of life." Seems you have chosen for yourself a pretty dramtic role.

It's not about the roll.

It's about not feeling like belonging, no matter what's done.

Darage ....are you spiritual???

it may be that theese are pre- natal influences you are feeling from a past life ....especially if you felt them from that early of an age.

it is likely that you were a renunciant in a past life and you are feeling that pull of leaving the family like renunciants do....

it is to free your self of attachments so you can progress spiritually and if i had to guess i would say in a past life you were a buddhist or hindu savant.

if you dont have spiritual feelings than it maybe your a fiercely independent person from past lives....
if you believe it .........

I am spiritual and yes i do believe in past lives.

I believe in 1 past life i was a Nazi though i am VERY against racism. Racism is a load of Bull# that needs to be stamped out in this world...

Also i believe in another life i was a blonde Female, as when i've had dreams, that i was a chick, every time i've been the exact same looking blonde girl... that looks about 20 years old....

Neways....
Yeah....


And yes i do feel that i NEED to detach fully away from my parents and my relatives.... and that they aren't meant to play any more of a role in my life. And it's best for them and for me if we dont see/speak to each other anymore....

i feel like i'm going to d osomething important in my life. Yet i don't know what it is yet. I don't like people holding me back that is what's gonna stop me from making a difference in my lifetime.