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My 19 year old daughter was whinning to me today about her 19 year old boyfriend. (man! I'm old!). Anyway, realizing that no matter what I said, even if I agreed with her, I'd be the bad guy, I volunteered: "he's a nice boy." She sighed and said, "I know. What's wrong with me?" I said, "nothing's wrong with you, honey, you just need a man, not a boy." She was totally shocked and said, "that's exactly it!"
i]We must have different definitions for "MEN" then. As I have told my daughters (and sons): Men are allowed to be fallable, have and show emotions, be afraid, etc. Doesn't make then less manly.
Not speaking for all women here but in my books the difference between boys and men is honor. Boys either avoid difficult/painful situations or run away from them. Men will take a more honorable course. Women will too.
Either sex that expects the other to "take care of them" is immature and not worth even bothering with for relationship purposes.
Ever wonder why more men hold positions of power? It's because we are stone cold. We're expected to make decisions, as leaders, in a logical and unemotional manner. This is classic body language assesment. You'll notice that women in power are very much like men.
Originally posted by DevolutionEvolvd
Guys too, but women already understand this. Sometimes I wonder where the problem really lies. Are women really so hard to understand, or, are men just too dumb to get it?
Oh, and is there a problem with the other 50 "Nice guy/girls are weird" threads?
I have to disagree with Herman in a sense. Men do indeed require taking care of as well.
posted by orangetom
Originally posted by Herman
I think you hit it on the head - a lot of women (or girls?) want what they can't have, and rarely know what they actually DO want.
Of course, all people are different as individuals, so those things aren't always true.
Originally posted by Herman
Was I not clear? You and whitewave both seem to have misinterpreted what I was saying. I said that men DO require care, and that men DO have problems and faults.
I think part of the nice guy's problem is that because he is nice he thinks he can do no wrong. It can make him appear very self-righteous.
Always being nice must be a terrible burden. Nice people can have trouble expressing their true emotions because they don't want to be seen as 'not nice'.
This can result in sulking or some other unattractive behaviour because a nice person will not or cannot own up to their real problem - leaving their partner baffled.
Nice people can also have a hidden, darker side that only manifests later on in a relationship when they can't keep up the niceness or they find themselves opposed or thwarted.
If you find yourself with an out-and-out bxs txrd, there is always hope that he will see the error of his ways - after all his faults are so obvious. And a harsh exterior can hide a soft and loving interior.
The impression given is that being nice should be enough and if it isn't, then the woman must be at fault for not appreciating the niceness. Or even for daring to want more.
If you find yourself with an out-and-out bxs txrd, there is always hope that he will see the error of his ways - after all his faults are so obvious.
Unless they upset me - see aforementioned drama queen. Had to have a few words with him the other night, he'd spent over a week letting me clear and cut-back a quarter acre garden with a pair of shears, a rake and a yardbrush while he moped in his room listening to music.
Utter nonsense. Women are not fools and know very well that the "nice guy routine" is just another routine. I mean you "nice guys" have even admitted the niceness is an act. Next you'll be whining about how women don't give pity sex for when you start crying like little boys. [youtube even has a special club for these guys.. and it's not even satire! ] Desperate, manipulative and pathetic is not sexy.. and it certainly isn't nice.