Sex before Marriage?

I was just wondering how many of you older folk actually waited until marriage.Im a teen still trying to make that decision. Were you happier after you did? How many of you didn't wait? Are you happy with current marriage? I just wanted to see this from the point of view ofsomeone who's already been there.

I don't know what you mean by older (I'm 29), but do what you feel is right for yourself. If it is some sort of religious hang-up you have about it then just think about why god would give us the urge to have sex, but then say that it is a sin before marrage. Most of the christian rules were constructed by man and not god. Just do what is best for you, but always be careful; it is a scary world out there.

sometimes I wish that I would have waited.

My ex-wife waited.. we talked about it later and she was happy that she did.


I was 15 my first time and it cost me a dear friendship. That's the main reason I would have waited, but I probably would have ended up with someone else before marriage anyway.. ahhh to be able to go back and re-live those moments...

I say it's a personal thing. If you think you should wait, then do so, if you don't then go for it, at least once or twice.

Just remember though, choose your partner carefully and by all means practive safe sex.

You should screw as many people as possible before you get married. Once you are married you only get to be with one person. You have to try people out first.

I think it is a personal choice that only you can make..

There is no right or wrong about it...

But i would say wait untill you find someone who you really know you love, someone you care so much about and you could not imagin life without that person..

then its right, before or after you wed.

It is also something you would talk about with the person involved,

Nature gave us sex organs for a reason. If this is because of religion the screw that, get going with it. If it's just a personal choice of yours then, hey, whatever floats your boat man.

I didn't wait, but that's was just me being me. You should do whatever you feel is right for you.

BUT please do use protection whenever you choose to do it.

Let me give a good example of when "waiting is not a good thing"

I have a sister in law who is 30. She still lives with her parents. She is not ugly or enormous. She is a fundamentalist baptist, like her parents. She truely feels she must keep her virginity for her partner.

She has had dates she can only count on 1 hand. She has been offered more but refused. She is a virgin. She is still waiting to give it to mister right.

What she has not thought about is that at this age of 30 she will probably have a hard time finding a man whos is a virgin. She has never found anyone in her church, they are all too young or too old. So most likely she will end up marrying someone who has not saved it for her so that kinda makes her gift to him less special. Mostly likely the man doesn't really care anyhow. So all this time it has been special only to her and she will give it away and not get someone else special virginity in return. I say she has waited in vain.

My second point is sex is an extremely important part of marriage. Good sex doesn't always last forever but bad sex can ruin a marriage. With no prior experience she will be stuck with the man she marries. What if he is really bad at sex, has a small, small penis. How will she know what satisfying sex is. Will she be doomed to be with him and suffer in a sex life that is worse than bad? That will cause alot of frustration and strife in a marriage. It is very important for a woman to know what pleases her and how to please a man. If she knows non of this I hope she marries a very kind, loving, educating man who will take the time to show her otherwise she will not find happiness.

I don't think waiting for marriage is a good thing. You must know what you like and how you like it for the sake of your future marriage. I don't think sleeping with anyone and everyone is a good idea either. What matters the most is that you have intense feelings of love and respect for the person regardless if you plan on marrying the person or not. It should be someone who you can laugh with and be friends with regardless of the sex.

Sometimes when you marry your sex life takes downward spirials and what do you have left? You better hope you have laughter and friendship to hold you through those rough times. In a solid relationship sex is wonderful and sometimes just ok.

Oh, and you could also just have plenty of oral sex. Not as good as the real thing but it'll keep you pure.

There was a guy at my old work place. He was the biggest player I�ve known. He would have a new girl friend every week. Sometimes he had several girl friends at once. He would try & teach the ways of a player, I resisted because I didn�t feel it was right to take advantage of women like that. Just for kicks I tried out what he told me. Sure enough it worked but I felt like crap the next day. What�s the point to what I said? I don�t know, just felt like telling the story hehe. But I do think it�s best to wait if that�s possible. I�m not going to be a hypocrite & tell people they should wait when I haven�t

Why wait?

What if you have a horrible accident and die or become paralyzed? You still have your virginity, but you'll never get rid of it.

I didnt wait and Im glad. Sex is good.

I'm not married. I didn't wait.
My advice to you: Don't wait. You shouldn't buy the first car you see. You should test drive a few first. It's the same way with women. If you wait, you're going to have a pretty lame wedding night.

Originally posted by NotTooHappy
I'm not married. I didn't wait.
My advice to you: Don't wait. You shouldn't buy the first car you see. You should test drive a few first. It's the same way with women. If you wait, you're going to have a pretty lame wedding night.

Especially if you dont know where to put it on that night, wont she be dissapointed.

Would you buy a car without a test drive?
Would you buy a home without a walk through?
Would you take a job not knowing what it was about?
Would you post to an ATS thread without reading what the topic is about?

See? You CAN do all of those things, but how happy are you going to be? You will always question, always wonder "is this it?" or "is this how it is supposed to be?" and not have any frame of reference. You or your partner could be lousy which could mean that you both end up unsatisfied and unhappy.

Your call, but I would advise against it. Sure, you can hope for the dream situation but remember the statistics. 50% or more end in divorce. Why add to that percentage by dealing with unknowns?

Thanks to you all !!

Originally posted by worldwatcher
I didn't wait, but that's was just me being me. You should do whatever you feel is right for you.

BUT please do use protection whenever you choose to do it.

Not the funniest answer in this thread by a long shot, however this is the single most important advice that I would also agree with!!

I'm not talking about protection from STD's either. Although, that is certainly important, especially for you and should be thought about too. But even something along those lines, should it happen, makes it a lesson for you and you alone (for the most part). That lesson being the fact that you should be careful where you stick your wee wee from now on!! :bash:

What I am talking about is far more horrible though, which is why 'PROTECTION' is a must should you decide to pull that gun from it's holster. It is worse because should something go wrong, it is a rough lesson for more than just you and a few who are close to you. I am of course speaking of an Unplanned & Unwanted CHILD!! That is the last thing ANYONE needs including you especially!! This world is filled with too many of them already and it doesn't seem to be stopping anytime soon.

So, if you want to stay a virgin, Good, Fantastic!!
If you want to play Hide the Pickle, slap on a pickle protector or even better (pleasure wise anyway) is to make sure some Birth Control is in there somewhere. As long as nobody starts pushing out puppies, just to let em go wild, I say Do Whatever Ya Want, As Much as You Want, and in As Many Goofy, Slippery, Sticky & Memorable Ways As You Want, Too.

But if there is No Guards on Duty, Don't Get Careless!! You 'Spank it' or have her 'Spank it' for ya, or even better maybe some 69, or Basic Oral. The, 'I'll pull out early" method is about as safe as leaving a Junkie in a Pharmacy, and hoping that nothing goes wrong.

Did you come to any decisions EricFM?

I guess I am the only one then!

I waited and I have no reget.

Well depends on your wife.(and I am one of the lucky)

After having sex with other your marriage tends to fall apart to fast.

Out,
Russian

Originally posted by John Nada
Did you come to any decisions EricFM?

Shhhhhh! He is in the other room having sex.

^ lol. I think im gonna wait until I can be responsible for the descions possibly til marriage. ie. in my own house with a job etc. Thanks again for the posts. They mean alot to me.