posted on Sep, 7 2008 @ 12:00 PM
(warning for sadness)
I don't want to talk about it ...
At the time and on that day my wife and I were renting an apartment in the West Village at 95 Horatio St. Half a block from West St. and
approximately 25 blocks from the WTC.
Without wishing to revisit that day but for the briefest of moments but I will say this. Of all the scorched memories of the day, I will never forget
the the combination of taste and smell that was impossible to wash away during the first few days. A combination of dust, concrete, smoke, burned
flesh, and who knows what else.
The Mayor decided to evacuate everybody below Canal Street. They allowed restricted access only to residents between Canal and 14th street. Horatio
St. is between Canal and 14th. I say this because we could have packed up and left in the days that followed, but to go where really?
Please, why am I talking about this ...
To this day, on the rare occasion when my mind drifts to those days, it will sometimes trigger a "memory" reflex in my throat and I swear I can
still taste death.
There is condition that plagues a lot of people in NYC, and I imagine the other places where the planes crashed, and everywhere else. It's this kind
of malaise that builds subconsciously inside you and it starts every year towards the middle of august. You start seeing plugs on tv for new 9/11
documentaries, they start showing the planes crashing, they keep talking about ceremonies and memorials, you start remembering the friends and
neighbors that were lost, etc etc.
And this gradual depression evolves and increases as the day grows near.
I don't want to and I can't watch a lot of these exposes.
I don't have the appropriate and proportional emotional capacity to respond to the facts. I'll store my feelings on these facts in the same dark
place I keep all the others from those those days, and hope they don't eat me from within.
I am done talking about it ....
For some all this stuff is important, it gives them a sense that their loved ones perished for something important or that solving the "mysteries"
or "knowing" will make the whole thing more understandable. I think that is wonderful! I have so much respect and appreciation for both 9/11
"truthers" and "skeptics" for caring enough to get involved.
For others like us, we'd be very happy to never hear of it again.
So we'll wait till that's over in a few days.
All my best wishes and love to those who are dealing with these feelings as we speak.
All my love to every one. You raise me up.
I don't want to talk about it . . .