I'm definitely nice, but definitely not a doormat or clingy. Let me see if I can answer your questions.
1) are you interested in "nice girls"? that is to say, if a girl acted toward you the way you act toward the women who blow you off, how
would you react? i've noticed that most self-proclaimed "nice guys" seem to go after women who are not "nice girls". this is as ironic as when
you hear an ugly guy complaining that "hot chicks are so shallow...they only care about looks".
Yes, I'm interested in nice girls. To be honest, a girl can be hot as Hell, but I'll be totally turned off by her if she has a bad attitude.
Personality is everything to me. Yes, the girl does need to be attractive to me, but I've found that girls I never thought I'd be attracted to
suddenly become very attractive because of their personalities. I think using "game" and going after the hot chicks with horrible personalities
only grants temporary happiness, and no long-term fulfillment. But hey, if that's what you're going for, more power to you. I'm nobody to
2)what, other than projecting yourself as a doormat, are you offering? you can't expect women to be drawn to you just because you're
desperate and a total pushover. in fact both of these are highly undesirable characteristics. girls like winners. they like excitement. they like
someone who challenges them.
For the sake of answering this question, I'll abandon some modesty. I'm a good looking guy whose in great physical shape. I get girls giving me
looks all the time. At the place I used to work, just about every girl who worked there at one time or another had a crush on me...some of them a bit
older, too. I'm intelligent and I have strong, well thought-out opinions on most important world issues. I can discuss with some level of
competency things from world religions, to philosophy, to psychology, to music and movies, etc. I play guitar and am at least decent at it. I get
good grades, I have a good part-time job, and I'm in college for Global Business. Oh, and above all else, I'm a nice guy.
I will always
treat a woman with the respect and dignity she deserves. I'll gladly drive and pay for dinner, unless she truly objects in which case I'm fine
either way. I don't look at women as sex objects. I actually listen to what she has to say, and really do consider her thoughts and opinions instead
of just waiting for her to shut up, and I will add my own opinions to the discussion. I would do anything for a girl I love, but not in a way that
allows me to be a "push-over." I could go on, but I'll stop here. I'm 21, I've only ever had one serious relationship, and it ended pretty
badly and fairly recently. These characteristics I possess allowed me to be taken advantage of. I got lied to (I don't mean she cheated on
me...it's kind of a long story,) and insulted. The girl who was my best friend before the relationship, and also the first girl I've ever been in
love with, broke up with me one day and apparently has no plans of ever having anything to do with me again. I had too much dignity to beg for her
back or harass her or anything like that. I just let her insult me and walk out of my life for good. I know that if I had been a little less honest
about some things...maybe if I'd rejected her every now and then when she wanted to go out...maybe if I'd pretended to be different than I truly am
and feigned unshakable confidence, things probably would have worked out differently. But I don't want that. I'm only good at being myself...I
don't play games, but unfortunately most girls my age don't want that. They want a guy with "game" that acts like all of the other guys, dresses
like all of the other guys, and listens to the same crappy music as all of the other guys. I guess this is why it irks me a little bit when people
start ragging on "the nice guy."
3) if you're aware your strategy isn't working, why not change? to me, this seems blindingly obvious. if you've really decided that "girls
don't like nice guy" then why not try a new approach? either you enjoy being disappointed or you aren't bright enough to figure out a new
Because to me, if you're looking for a real relationship and not just a sex-partner, you shouldn't have to use a strategy. It's not a game to me.
If I can't be completely myself and vice versa, it's not even worth pursuing because eventually the real "you" comes out. For a real, deep
relationship (which is the only kind I'm interested in) two people need to be able to be completely open and honest with each other To be really
happy, it seems like two people should love each other for who they truly are...not because of some stupid strategy or "game" or anything like that.
I mean yeah, I go on dates here and there, but I can tell pretty quickly whether or not something has potential to work out in the long run.
But again, that's just me. I understand that a lot of people aren't looking for a real relationship...just a bit of fun. That's perfectly fine,
I'm just not gonna date them. I understand their point of view, so why can't they understand mine?