Do You Have A Problem Teenager? If not then don't read this thread, this is serious stuff!

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posted on Aug, 6 2008 @ 04:33 PM
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I want to share a success story with anyone experiencing difficulty with a teenager in their school behavior. My two sons are 26 and 28 now and good guys. But when my youngest was in the 8th grade, he decided that school was a place built specially just for him, and that all the homeowners in that area were paying taxes just so he could go to school and socialize during class, smart off to the teachers, not really learn anything. Of course his theory was the teachers "just didn't like him." I got quite a few notes sent home, plenty of them I never even saw so I started getting phoned at work from the principal or vice principal about his disruptive behavior. I was a single parent by that time, so it was a challenge. The last resort I thought of was to tell him if he couldn't figure out how to act properly at school, then I would have to take off work and go with him to show him. Well I told him this about 3 or 4 times and he just sneered at me. Push came to shove and I called the principal with my idea; after the dead silence and he regained his composure, he said yes absolutely, he had just never had a parent ask to do anything like that. Well as threatened I took a vacation day and junior and I headed off to school. I gotta tell you the teachers treated me like royalty and made sure I had a chair right next to junior in every class. At lunchtime I was like a celebrity! All the kids stared and stared and you could tell junior and I were the talk of the town. Junior didn't speak to me for probably 3 months after that day, but guess what? I never got another phone call or note about his behavior. Hey where there's a will there's a way. No smart-mouthed teenager should ever get the upper hand. I may have been a little rough on my kids at times but they understand why and are grateful now. You have to teach kids respect above all things or they will spend their life getting doors closed in their face. Well hope this helps someone. It is gauranteed. Give them a few warnings first, then if no change, you have to follow through with your threat. That is the fun part anyway.




posted on Aug, 6 2008 @ 05:05 PM
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Great post , great idea , great parent , I am now forearmed
thank you



posted on Aug, 6 2008 @ 05:20 PM
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Yeah, I'm willing to bet you are the Mom, not the Dad. Only because it sounds like something Mom would have done to me.

My mom was the bomb. I was on the road to horrible myself. Mom did things like that to me and I actually have a bit of pride in myself for listening to her threats and eventually, advice.

Right on either way! Starred and Flagged!

Cuhail



posted on Aug, 6 2008 @ 05:51 PM
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I Love your post. I hope that one day when my son is older I will be a great parent also.



posted on Aug, 6 2008 @ 06:26 PM
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My wife and I have raised 8 children..to top that we are whats called a "blended" family...yours (her 4), mine (3), and ours (we've had 1 together).

I have to take my hat off to my wife, she came into my life at a time that as a man and having just gone through a divorce and getting custody of the children (3, 2 boys, 1 girl)...I was in waaaaay over my head!

I could keep the house and car and bills etc...all juggled, no prob, but it was apparent to all around that the kids were being given free rein and I was failing as a single parent...

In steps my hero ( my wife) and knocked it all on the head and set things right...I won't say this was an overnite accomplishment...it wasn't...but women have a gene us guys don't...the no sympathy for kids gene...

Us dads are pushovers when it comes to relating to kids directly, they turn on the charm or sympathy offensive and we fall apart...

I agree with what you say 100%, she has follow through! She does not/ did not make idle threats...you screw up at school PUNISHED!, don't clean your room PUNISHED!, act like an ass to your family PUNISHED!...no brokering a deal, no give and take....PUNISHED!

and to be honest it free'd me up to act like a dad...as a mom, she needed someone to act as ENFORCER...thats my job...and I do it well!

17 yrs later, we are like some well oiled tag-team duo!

thanks for the OP...great!, starred and flagged!



posted on Aug, 8 2008 @ 09:12 PM
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Brilliant solution. A+ parenting. You've inspired in me a whole additional approach to behavior guidance. Thank you for putting it out there for us.



posted on Aug, 8 2008 @ 09:17 PM
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good thing u werent my dad, i wouldve never forgave him for that. totally embarrassing.



posted on Aug, 11 2008 @ 01:26 PM
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Originally posted by DuneKnight
good thing u werent my dad, i wouldve never forgave him for that. totally embarrassing.


Well actually, I left after lunchtime, so I did cut him a little break there. But you know what? Even though he didn't speak to me for awhile, I definitely detected a sense of pride in him (though he would never verbalize it back then) that I cared enough to intervene in that way. Even though kids rebel, they want to know that someone smarter and wiser is in charge.



posted on Aug, 14 2008 @ 02:43 PM
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Originally posted by Bombeni
I want to share a success story with anyone experiencing difficulty with a teenager in their school behavior. My two sons are 26 and 28 now and good guys. But when my youngest was in the 8th grade, he decided that school was a place built specially just for him, and that all the homeowners in that area were paying taxes just so he could go to school and socialize during class, smart off to the teachers, not really learn anything. Of course his theory was the teachers "just didn't like him." I got quite a few notes sent home, plenty of them I never even saw so I started getting phoned at work from the principal or vice principal about his disruptive behavior. I was a single parent by that time, so it was a challenge. The last resort I thought of was to tell him if he couldn't figure out how to act properly at school, then I would have to take off work and go with him to show him. Well I told him this about 3 or 4 times and he just sneered at me. Push came to shove and I called the principal with my idea; after the dead silence and he regained his composure, he said yes absolutely, he had just never had a parent ask to do anything like that. Well as threatened I took a vacation day and junior and I headed off to school. I gotta tell you the teachers treated me like royalty and made sure I had a chair right next to junior in every class. At lunchtime I was like a celebrity! All the kids stared and stared and you could tell junior and I were the talk of the town. Junior didn't speak to me for probably 3 months after that day, but guess what? I never got another phone call or note about his behavior. Hey where there's a will there's a way. No smart-mouthed teenager should ever get the upper hand. I may have been a little rough on my kids at times but they understand why and are grateful now. You have to teach kids respect above all things or they will spend their life getting doors closed in their face. Well hope this helps someone. It is gauranteed. Give them a few warnings first, then if no change, you have to follow through with your threat. That is the fun part anyway.


With school starting everywhere in the next few days, a thought came to me. A lot of you parents may head potential problems off just by leaving a copy of the above story around for your kiddo to find, or just stick it in his/her hand and say "In case you get any bright ideas about acting up at school this year, I'm already one up on you" --- my son may have served as the sacrificial lamb for the others! When your kid reads where a parent actually used this method and it was successful, it may be enough to keep them in line.





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