It's Limerick Time!

That's right it's that time of the year when your new and blossoming limericks are brought into the open for all to enjoy! Here's a few of mine, and I warn you, they make NO sense!

There once was a bucket of fish,
That granted your every wish,
I asked for a car,
It was quite bizarre,
But it made a very fine dish!

And as if that wasn't good enough:

A thousand women per day,
Discover their boyfriend is gay,
They scream in sheer fright,
But then overnight,
They find that their man is okay!

Finally, adding insult to injury:

I once saw a man with no face,
Who I guess lived in outer space ,
He attempted to speak,
And after a week,
He was killed by a falling suitcase.

As you might have guessed, these were just made up at random! Does anyone else have any great limericks to share?

Well in 7th grade we had to write limericks for english.

And the day they were do I realized that I forgot to write one.

So 5 minutes before class I wrote this limerick.

There once was a boy named rasheed
One day he planted a seed
He dug a hole
With a pole
And found a leprechuan smoking weed.

When the teacher was grading the poems and came across mine he read it infront of the whole class.

But I ended up getting a B+ it was the best grade in the glass.
Propably because my teacher was an old hippie but I worked out.

Haha, that's great! Now there's a teacher who can spot talent!

And as for the limerick, I think it's a very meaningful portrayal of a process off us go through at least once in our lives! Nice one!

There once was a woman named Nuts
Who had tons of fury and guts..
She gave birth to fifty
And I thought that was nifty
And Nuts in no longer in ruts...

__________________________________-

I give my praise to the Lord
His major ego has soared
He love's sexy toes
He keeps them in rows
Now the Lord is no longer bored.

There once was an ape with minimal hair
That tromped through the land with no care
That learned to speak and write with words
Now there is a lack of birds
and cancer causing air

reply to post by Zaimless


Ah the foot fetishes of the almighty, is there any greater topic for a limerick?! haha! Good work!

reply to post by eye open doors


Very good! I couldn't possibly imagine what animal you were referring to. [Notices minimal amount of hair on body.] ... Damn!

There once was a man with an Uzi
He shot his girlfriend named Susie
He cut off her head
Burried her under the shed
And ran off with some other floozie


JesterMan

I trust that wasn't inspired by some personal experience? haha!

Great limerick!

Sorry the only limericks I know start out, there once was a man from nantucket... I just can't finnish them here

Ah nantucket, God's blind spot. The legends of what happened in that sinful place reverberate throughout history! I went there once, and have had a fear of buckets ever since!

There are good ones and bad ones of all different kind.
I used to write many of them as they just popped up in my mind.
Some where real funny and some where sad.
I even made some that made people real mad.

Times ticking away,
I'll think of more some other day!

Ah, limericks.

I wrote one in my AP English class for extra credit once, so I might as well share it.

The whale in the sea was afraid
Of the whaler whose beard was a braid.
But to his great joy
and a cry of "Ahoy!"
Some pirates trapped him in a raid.

Some more excellent lyrics guys!

I'm feeling creative this evening so I'll rustle up another.

Today my topics will be... ... ... Chairs! (Yes, I'm drawing inspiration from whatever I have to hand!)

Oh chairs are a wonderful thing,
I can't lie 'bout the joy that they bring,
But my face did turn pale,
Some guy'd stuck a nail,
Through the seat, and how it did sting!

Not bad for something just off the top of my head!