The Women's Restroom; and other feminine mysteries

Originally posted by sc2099
Has anyone else noticed that women tend to be much more likely to try to find common ground with their significant other than men are? It seems to me that women are much more willing to watch a football game or cheer for the home team than men are to read a book their wife read or take a trip to one of their favorite places. Why does everyone think that is?

Social pressure. How many women have you seen in a football jersey? How many men have you seen in a dress? Men are afraid to be seen by other men doing non-manly things. My question is, if they go somewhere non-manly and see other men, then what does that say about the other men? Catch-22 really. Also, if you're the only man there...that isn't exactly what most men would consider a "bad situation" now is it? I had a friend who was a nursing major. I had no idea he'd pick that. I said, "Nursing? Why nursing?" He looked at me straight faced and said, "Do you know how many guys are in my class?" *pointing at himself*. Recently found out his girlfriend is a doctor

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

Originally posted by saint4God

Originally posted by sc2099
Has anyone else noticed that women tend to be much more likely to try to find common ground with their significant other than men are? It seems to me that women are much more willing to watch a football game or cheer for the home team than men are to read a book their wife read or take a trip to one of their favorite places. Why does everyone think that is?

Social pressure. How many women have you seen in a football jersey? How many men have you seen in a dress? Men are afraid to be seen by other men doing non-manly things. My question is, if they go somewhere non-manly and see other men, then what does that say about the other men? Catch-22 really. Also, if you're the only man there...that isn't exactly what most men would consider a "bad situation" now is it?

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

A man doesn't have to put on a dress to identify with a woman. And why is doing something your wife likes non-manly? I would say most activities are gender neutral, outside of chick flicks and farting contests.

The point is women are willing to branch out and try something than men are. Take hiking for example - totally gender neutral. If a woman was with a man who liked hiking she would be much more likely to give it a try, even if she's never liked it than a man would be in the same situation.

This exchange raises another point. (In society) It's ok for women to take on masculine qualities because masculine qualities are seen as 'good' - honesty, integrity, industriousness, boldness, ingenuity. Whereas, for a man to take on feminine qualities ranges anywhere from laughable to dispicable - being conniving, emotional, petty, illogical, and cowardly.

Here's Madonna's video for 'What it Feels Like For a Girl.' She puts all this to the test in the song and the vid.

"For a boy to look like a girl is degrading, because you think being a girl is degrading."





[edit on 7/30/2008 by sc2099]

[edit on 7/30/2008 by sc2099]

The way things play out when you're out with the guys is entirely different than when there is even one female present. We ridicule each other constantly. It's all in good fun and it's just the natural way most groups of males interact. It is also more prominent when you're around guys you're comfortable with because everyone knows not to take offense.

If one of the dudes catches wind of their buddy doing anything "girly" (best example is my haggard friend who did a pole dance at a bar ) that guy is in for eternal harassment. We don't want to give our friends ammo. Where girls feel they have to look pretty to avoid ridicule, we have to abstain from girly activities.

For the record the guy who did a pole dance does still get harassed for it. We have no mercy haha.

EDIT TO ADD: If you want a guy to do something he wouldn't normally do you would have to approach him when you're alone and plan on doing that activity with just the two of you. We can be very flexible when the situation is presented in a way where we aren't inclined to just react right away, this is usually a very non-aggressive approach. "Why do you never want to do what I want to do!" is not a good way to approach it because then the guy feels like he's entering a battlefield.

[edit on 30/7/2008 by Scurvy]

Originally posted by Scurvy
The way things play out when you're out with the guys is entirely different than when there is even one female present. We ridicule each other constantly. It's all in good fun and it's just the natural way most groups of males interact. It is also more prominent when you're around guys you're comfortable with because everyone knows not to take offense.

If one of the dudes catches wind of their buddy doing anything "girly" (best example is my haggard friend who did a pole dance at a bar

) that guy is in for eternal harassment. We don't want to give our friends ammo. Where girls feel they have to look pretty to avoid ridicule, we have to abstain from girly activities.

For the record the guy who did a pole dance does still get harassed for it. We have no mercy haha.

EDIT TO ADD: If you want a guy to do something he wouldn't normally do you would have to approach him when you're alone and plan on doing that activity with just the two of you. We can be very flexible when the situation is presented in a way where we aren't inclined to just react right away, this is usually a very non-aggressive approach. "Why do you never want to do what I want to do!" is not a good way to approach it because then the guy feels like he's entering a battlefield.

[edit on 30/7/2008 by Scurvy]

A fun musical grunge dude, that can dress slick if he needs to... Knows how to hang out with the guys.. confidence outweighs most things. You sound fun. I wouldn't change a thing from here.

reply to post by seagrass


Thank you very much. You should come up to Saskatchewan and tell all the girls here that, I may have more luck

Originally posted by saint4God
Picking up the slack:


I found out my spouse hated putting away clean dishes. This is good, because I hate dealing with dirty dishes. The plan? Spouse takes care of the dirty, I put away the clean. For responsibilities we both don't like, we trade them off. This time I do the laundry, next time I take out the trash, etc. Sure, we can go with traditional roles (men mow the lawn, women vacuum the rug) but if they really really don't like doing them, perhaps a swap is in order.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

I also hate putting away clean dishes and I will tell you why. It does not clear up space or make anything look cleaner. Its a job that takes time and has nothing to show for itself as far as the cleanliness of the kitchen. When I put in dirty ones, something looks done.

Originally posted by Scurvy
reply to post by seagrass

 

Thank you very much. You should come up to Saskatchewan and tell all the girls here that, I may have more luck

You are only 21 right? have fun. They will come when you are not looking. Just remember we don't usually make the first move. If you see the same woman hanging around a lot, chances are she wants you to notice her.

Originally posted by sc2099
A man doesn't have to put on a dress to identify with a woman.

Hehe, I didn't mean that...although if he had to do so with stockings, make-up and shaved legs, it may give a greater appreciation as to "why is she taking so long getting ready?!"

Originally posted by sc2099
And why is doing something your wife likes non-manly?

This is a good question. I chalk it up to social pressure.

Originally posted by sc2099
I would say most activities are gender neutral, outside of chick flicks and farting contests.

I'd pay money to see this as a combined activity across both genders. "Sixteen Candles always makes me gassy" *blush*. Anyway, I think from the male point of view, there may be a lot more activities considered women's activities than women may realize.

Oh, an address to men: scented oils from The Body Shop: www.thebodyshop.com... . Works better than air fresheners or scented candles...and you get to play with fire lighting the tea light. Use that big grilling torch if you like.

Originally posted by sc2099
The point is women are willing to branch out and try something than men are.

Agreed.

Originally posted by sc2099
Take hiking for example - totally gender neutral. If a woman was with a man who liked hiking she would be much more likely to give it a try, even if she's never liked it than a man would be in the same situation.

Hiking usually is seen as a 'man sport' if you believe the Jeep 4X4 commercials, though agree that it is supposed to be gender neutral. An excellent proposal and compromise if she's interested.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

Originally posted by amatrine
I also hate putting away clean dishes and I will tell you why. It does not clear up space or make anything look cleaner. Its a job that takes time and has nothing to show for itself as far as the cleanliness of the kitchen. When I put in dirty ones, something looks done.

The second time I've heard this and always a help to see validation. In my paradigm, I hate going for a dish and can't find it because it's dirty. Also, old food is smelly and the dishwasher doesn't clean the dishes, I do before I put them in. The dishwasher only makes them warm.

Originally posted by Scurvy
reply to post by seagrass

 

Thank you very much. You should come up to Saskatchewan and tell all the girls here that, I may have more luck

You sound fun to me too. We need more of your kind out here in TO.

Originally posted by saint4God

Anyway, I think from the male point of view, there may be a lot more activities considered women's activities than women may realize.

Maybe you're right. Like what?

[edit on 7/30/2008 by sc2099]

The best pick up line I have ever seen is.. a nod and a smile. It doesn't say anything, except "hey how are ya" or " hey I see you there and it makes me smile"

Originally posted by seagrass
The best pick up line I have ever seen is.. a nod and a smile. It doesn't say anything, except "hey how are ya" or " hey I see you there and it makes me smile"

For me, I was hook line and sinker when my sig. other and I talked about what would happen if the world were to end over the phone until 5 a.m. That kind of depth had both my head and heart swimming.

Originally posted by saint4God

Originally posted by seagrass
The best pick up line I have ever seen is.. a nod and a smile. It doesn't say anything, except "hey how are ya" or " hey I see you there and it makes me smile"

For me, I was hook line and sinker when my sig. other and I talked about what would happen if the world were to end over the phone until 5 a.m. That kind of depth had both my head and heart swimming.

Good one. I ended up having one of those with my husband. I don't remember what we talked about...but it went on forever. I had phone ear when we were done.

It is true that woman are not as ready to approach a man. In my case,
when I met my husband, was during the 100 year flood in Reno Nevada. I was out with friends on the wrong side of the river, when the bridge collapsed.
So I went to a bar. There were three other men in there. One guy was trying to pick up on me, he was a funny little dude, that was telling me how he worshiped Satan, and wanted me to go skiing with him. No joke. I just wanted away from the dork. I saw my husband to be and another guy playing pool. I thought he was cute, so I put quarters on the table to get to play him pool and meet him.
Well he lost, and I had to play the other guy. After that I just said hell with it, and went and sat next to him and started a conversation. We talked all night. I was tired, and could not get home because the bridge was gone. He did not know me yet gave me the keys to his place and said I could stay there the night, and he went to work. he did not know if I was a robber,lol just gave me the keys,lol I stayed there, and left him a note with my number.
He called me a week later and the rest was history.

He told me later it took him all week to get the nerve to call me,lol

reply to post by sc2099


I doubt there are many out there to begin with. I've been told I'm an intimidating person at first glance, kind of the "tall, dark, and mysterious" sort of deal. I'm a spiritual enthusiast and I follow world politics. I party and I meditate. I have a disgusting sense of humor and I did a lot of work with people with mental disabilities. I'm very compassionate and I love death metal.

I'm an oxymoron

Originally posted by amatrine
It is true that woman are not as ready to approach a man. In my case,
when I met my husband, was during the 100 year flood in Reno Nevada. I was out with friends on the wrong side of the river, when the bridge collapsed.
So I went to a bar. There were three other men in there. One guy was trying to pick up on me, he was a funny little dude, that was telling me how he worshiped Satan, and wanted me to go skiing with him. No joke. I just wanted away from the dork. I saw my husband to be and another guy playing pool. I thought he was cute, so I put quarters on the table to get to play him pool and meet him.
Well he lost, and I had to play the other guy. After that I just said hell with it, and went and sat next to him and started a conversation. We talked all night. I was tired, and could not get home because the bridge was gone. He did not know me yet gave me the keys to his place and said I could stay there the night, and he went to work. he did not know if I was a robber,lol just gave me the keys,lol I stayed there, and left him a note with my number.
He called me a week later and the rest was history.

He told me later it took him all week to get the nerve to call me,lol

That's a great story. I bet leaving that number was scary a little too.

Originally posted by Scurvy
reply to post by sc2099

 

I doubt there are many out there to begin with. I've been told I'm an intimidating person at first glance, kind of the "tall, dark, and mysterious" sort of deal. I'm a spiritual enthusiast and I follow world politics. I party and I meditate. I have a disgusting sense of humor and I did a lot of work with people with mental disabilities. I'm very compassionate and I love death metal.

I'm an oxymoron

Oxymorons must be attractive then, you will have no problems...someone will see through that mysterious side and notice your compassion.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by seagrass]

Originally posted by Demandredwhat is it about a toilet seat being up that upsets women so much, if we have to lift it how hard is it to flip it down?

Lol...have you ever had to run to the restroom at 2AM, in the dark, half asleep, while pregnant (or not), sit on the toilet to go pee and --- oh darn that water can be cold on your bum when the seat is up and you are not prepared. It is just not as shocking to the system if you accidentally sit on the lid instead of falling in the bowl.

And besides, women are not the ones who stand to pee and then pee on the toilet for the next person to possibly sit on or have to clean up before they go. It just might be possible that if a man were to clean up his mess when he leaves that their would not be an issue in regards to this anyway.

It's more sanitary to put the seat/lid down, when you flush water/etc. splashes out of the toilet onto the surrounding area ie:pants, shoes, walls etc Also water evaporates bringing pollutants with it at a faster rate when the lid is up.

AND---what happened to just a little bit of gentlemanly actions? Like opening a door for another person etc.

I read just the 1st page of this thread but I had to ask before I was done reading all of it. Here goes...

Why is it during a "discussion" with a woman and a man feels he's actually fixed things.... a few days later he's confronted with it again? I think I know why. The woman who HAD the discussion quickly went to her OWN girlfriends and discussed it, sort of a womans court.

This happens all the time and this "court" is packed with yes women. There in lies the problem. We aren't just arguing with you but every female you know! It's exasperating! NOW, You've had a "few days to think about it", you've consulted with your friends and decided to renegotiate the terms of the "discussion" we had DAYS AGO! Men NEVER get on the phone or talk to their buds at work about what relationship problems they have but women feel the need to consult. What does that say about making up your own minds?

Also, I'd rather NOT have "our" personal business discussed within the family. Yet that happens as well! Say there was a rough patch in a relationship..... why does the entire side of the womens family and friends need to know about it? Why can't women keep private matters just between the couple that you are?

I could go on but I think I made my point.