The Women's Restroom; and other feminine mysteries

Originally posted by intrepid

Originally posted by seagrass
For all you nerds out there, think of it this way. We would all love to fool around with Wolverine, but everyone knows Cyclops is the husband material. LOL

Oh really?

Just catching up on this thread. I've got a few more pages to go.

Here, an oldie, you may have heard it:

Q- Why do men die first?

A- Because they want to.

LOL I totally thought of your avatar when I typed that. It's true though. Who wouldn't want Wolverine? He's an archetypal bad boy. But any woman would be stupid to try to marry that type of man. It would never work out - too unstable.

Originally posted by sc2099

Originally posted by intrepid

Originally posted by seagrass
For all you nerds out there, think of it this way. We would all love to fool around with Wolverine, but everyone knows Cyclops is the husband material. LOL

Oh really?

Just catching up on this thread. I've got a few more pages to go.

Here, an oldie, you may have heard it:

Q- Why do men die first?

A- Because they want to.

LOL I totally thought of your avatar when I typed that. It's true though. Who wouldn't want Wolverine? He's an archetypal bad boy. But any woman would be stupid to try to marry that type of man. It would never work out - too unstable.

not to mention painful... you would never know when those claws would come out during sex....

reply to post by seagrass


Haha that just adds to the excitement and danger! Then again you never know if Scott's glasses might fall off. OUCH! LOL we have issues...

Originally posted by seagrass
not to mention painful... you would never know when those claws would come out ....

Originally posted by sc2099
Haha that just adds to the excitement and danger! Then again you never know if Scott's glasses might fall off. OUCH! LOL we have issues...

There's a reason why they call them "X-Men"

A point on topic though, a lot of people (male or female) are a lot easier to understand once you know their goals. Sims 2 comes to mind if anyone has played it. If you want someone to go "platinum" find out what those goals are and help them achieve it. Men and women oft have different goals. Some goals are social, some goals are material, some goals are physical, etc. Once you know those, motivations become a lot easier to understand. After motivations, then the little things like what we say and what we do become much more clear.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

This thread is awesome! I love the lighthearted humour that's running rampant.

I'm a male, 21, and I've been told I'm a very attractive person. I've actually been offered modelling contracts by random people. My response is always ....... I'd rather not be involved in anything that pays me for how I look (although I can't say I wasn't tempted simply for easy money); my belief system prevailed in the end.

I like what you said Karl about how a successful relationship has two components: the physical attraction and the personality connection. One without the other isn't enough for a successful relationship.

Girls, I'm a metalhead (long hair, scruffy facial hair, band shirts, always casual dress). I used to be one of those fashionable guys, taking half an hour to do my hair in the morning and stuff like that (this is when I was in high school). Since getting more and more into music this is just how I've evolved. What are your opinions on the "grunge" look, for lack of a better description?

Also why do we have to approach you? It would make my day for a girl to come up and compliment me!! Maybe me not being "pretty" anymore has doomed me to single life... or perhaps I just need a cool hippy girlfriend who actually likes long hair.

Originally posted by saint4God

Originally posted by seagrass
not to mention painful... you would never know when those claws would come out ....

Originally posted by sc2099
Haha that just adds to the excitement and danger! Then again you never know if Scott's glasses might fall off. OUCH! LOL we have issues...

There's a reason why they call them "X-Men"

A point on topic though, a lot of people (male or female) are a lot easier to understand once you know their goals. Sims 2 comes to mind if anyone has played it. If you want someone to go "platinum" find out what those goals are and help them achieve it. Men and women oft have different goals. Some goals are social, some goals are material, some goals are physical, etc. Once you know those, motivations become a lot easier to understand. After motivations, then the little things like what we say and what we do become much more clear.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

so true indeed, and if the goals are clear, often times they are actually mutual. They are just described differently, and/or are a different part or aspect of the same goal.

I was wondering....why do women want to save money yet they buy clothing,shoes,and purses almost every week or two???My stepmom said she said she NEEDS to buy it for differnt pairs but most of them dont even macth?!?!?!And right when she bought a new purse(she has thirty)she wanted to buy another one that also didnt macth!!!Can anyone explain why???

reply to post by theendisnear69


I would like to know why women always pass up the good guy and go after the a$$hole?

1. The jerky guy is more attractive usually than nicer guys (not saying always but in many cases). Would you date and sleep with someone you don’t find attractive?
2. Sometimes nice can be boring. Sometimes having someone around who is a little meaner yet more interesting is worth it.
3. Women love to settle, if they don’t think they can find everything they want in one guy they will more likely settle for a guy who has character flaws like the a$$hole, than a nice guy who is not as attractive or interesting as the other guy.

I’m not saying I live by these standards, but many women I know do. I personally started dating the “nice guys” a long time ago and I don’t feel like I’m settling, because I date nice guys who while not always being more attractive than jerky guys they treat me well, work harder on pleasing me than an over confident- self-important jerks, and of course I only date nice guys that have similar interest and can keep my interest.

As to another poster who said some women are too unstable emotionally sometimes it happens often for reasons most people, especially men, do not realize. A lot of women are emotional because of their hormonal make up, and chemical imbalances just like someone with a mental disease might be experiencing. This is why there are many women who fit the stereotype that women are not interested in sex, especially after having a child, because we have a lot of things that happen to our bodies and can mess up our system, many women have what causes a sex drive in you thrown off after a pregnancy. Some of the explanations for these emotional things are not emotional explanations, they are chemical explanations, chemical problems that can be corrected.

Originally posted by Scurvy

Girls, I'm a metalhead (long hair, scruffy facial hair, band shirts, always casual dress). I used to be one of those fashionable guys, taking half an hour to do my hair in the morning and stuff like that (this is when I was in high school). Since getting more and more into music this is just how I've evolved. What are your opinions on the "grunge" look, for lack of a better description?

If you can pull it off then you can look just as hot as any guy in the Abercrombie catalog. Besides, lots of ugly rocker guys get girls so if you're as good looking as you say it should be like shooting fish in a barrel at a grunge club or other such venue.

Also why do we have to approach you? It would make my day for a girl to come up and compliment me!!

Haha, it makes our day too. Most girls are too shy to approach a guy. I'm not one of them but hey, I'm awesome. (j/ks) A lot of women feel it's unladylike to be foreward towards a man. In fact, some men don't like it and believe they should be the one to make the first move. If it doesn't look like she's going to approach you then don't waste time, approach her!Confidence is the biggest aphrodisiac. If you act like you deserve a girl's attention, she will think you do as well.

Originally posted by Scurvy
This thread is awesome! I love the lighthearted humour that's running rampant.

I'm a male, 21, and I've been told I'm a very attractive person. I've actually been offered modelling contracts by random people. My response is always

...

...

. I'd rather not be involved in anything that pays me for how I look (although I can't say I wasn't tempted simply for easy money); my belief system prevailed in the end.

I like what you said Karl about how a successful relationship has two components: the physical attraction and the personality connection. One without the other isn't enough for a successful relationship.

Girls, I'm a metalhead (long hair, scruffy facial hair, band shirts, always casual dress). I used to be one of those fashionable guys, taking half an hour to do my hair in the morning and stuff like that (this is when I was in high school). Since getting more and more into music this is just how I've evolved. What are your opinions on the "grunge" look, for lack of a better description?

Also why do we have to approach you? It would make my day for a girl to come up and compliment me!! Maybe me not being "pretty" anymore has doomed me to single life... or perhaps I just need a cool hippy girlfriend who actually likes long hair.

Grunge is cool, but are you flexible about dressing up for a wedding? lol. It's fun to picture. Dang! Be yourself, you sound great the way you are. Women don't want to do the chasing, we do it it subtle ways. We know how uncomfortable it is for you too, and we do feel sorry for you having to do it and come up with new and exciting ways.... but it is what it is.... we admire the girls who can go after who they want too.

reply to post by Scurvy


My husband has long hair, I think it looks nice. I do not think long or short hair should matter. There are people who love both, but it should not be a priority in why you are with someone.

My brother is one of those people that has to have every hair in place, and takes an hour to get ready, presses his own clothes because no one does it as good as him, lol He then went into the military. Hes married, and he walks around the house doing dust checks with his finger. His poor wife! lol

reply to post by Scurvy


I used to be one of those fashionable guys,

I just want to say that it is a myth women want those Hollister type guys. Yeah some women do and some don’t. Like anything else it comes down to very individuals own taste, but none of my friends are attracted to those guys, unless my gay male friends are around- they’re the only people I know who date those types of guys.

What are your opinions on the "grunge" look, for lack of a better description?

It depends on how you pull it off, but again I’m sure some women would love it and some would consider it a major turn off.

Also why do we have to approach you? It would make my day for a girl to come up and compliment me!!

I honestly think women like the notion that men’s worlds should revolve around them. You should call me first, you should be talking to me first, you should be asking me out, you should be thinking about me always instead of other girls. Its selfish but I’m sure the whole “daddy’s little princess” mentality made a lot of girls that way.

Both men and women have 'the right look' for themselves. Overall men give the impression they are less in-tuned with this because physical appearance isn't a judged attribute as heavily as it seems to be for women. Men seem to put more stock in a 'nice looking girl' because it demonstrates their togetherness and willingness to go the extra mile for a guy whereas a woman may wish to see other attributes such as a sense of humor or charismatic personality. These are generalizations of course and there are exceptions to the rule.

Women overall tend to have more education in how to appear in public from books, magazines, television, and so forth. If you have a guy, see if you can get him to shop with you, "honey, will you come with me and tell me what clothes I look good in?" Asking a guy to look you up and down should make him jump out of his easy-chair. Warning: Taking too much time shopping will cause a tiresome trip for your sig. other. Go in short bursts now and then, get a feel for what he likes to see and why. You don't always have to dress for your guy, but it's flattering to do so now and then.

My advice for guys is to change your look now and then to see what gets the best compliments (ladies tend to do this frequently to settle on a look). For example, cut your hair. Did people say:

1.) Nothing at all. This means the change had no significant impact or is so wretchedly terrible everyone is afraid to something.

2.) "Oh, you've cut your hair". Okay, not exactly what you were going for. Change was noticed but whether is was good is either undecided or bad.

3.) Woman says to you, "Wow, your hair looks good!" take that for face value. Fellow man says to you, "Dude, nice cut" or "Lookin' sharp" is the masculine equivalent of "Wow, your hair looks good!"

Men, watch What Not to Wear or other personal grooming shows with your girl. Every now and they make over a guy and you can see how complex appearance positive body image really is. Your gal may think you're showing a more sensitive side and willing to commit quality time with her interests if that's her thing. Go shopping with her and try on different clothes yourself. Ask her opinion, she's probably right.



[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

A few posters have talked about why women feel compelled to look like supermodels, and the emotions that result when we fall short. For anyone who is interested in one woman's struggle with beauty, feel free to refer to my recent thread How To Let Go.

p.s. seagrass told me it was ok to promote it.

Originally posted by saint4God

Men, watch What Not to Wear or other personal grooming shows with your girl. Every now and they make over a guy and you can see how complex appearance positive body image really is. Your gal may think you're showing a more sensitive side and willing to commit quality time with her interests if that's her thing. Go shopping with her and try on different clothes yourself. Ask her opinion, she's probably right.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

Great advice, Saint. What Not To Wear has so much great advice for people of all shapes and sizes. It's one of my favorite shows. Also, for people in Canada, a fabulous show that comes on W network is 'Style by Jury'. This show has so many great tips and they take people (men and women) who look like they crawled out of a dumpster and not only give them a makeover but teach them the life skills they need for confidence.

And for women to learn how to let go of that need to be a supermodel, watch 'How to Look Good Naked'. Just make sure you watch the UK version because the US version just isn't as good.

I am more than ok with promoting it. I think it is a very important thread. When I think of the 15 year old poster earlier, I hope we can catch some of them early. It is devastating to women and I think it one of the most important issues we need to face. It drives a huge wedge between men and women. If beauty driven ideals isn't a conspiracy I don't know what is...

[edit on 30-7-2008 by seagrass]

Picking up the slack:

You'd think after being married for a while, you'd be more in-tuned with what yoru sig. other is thinking and feeling. Often times in our comfort we fall out of touch with the changing interests of the opposite sex. One discovery I'd made is by taking an active interest in your spouse's hobbies, the more engaged your spouse can be with you. For example, if s/he is reading a book, after they're done read it as well. You don't have to like it, but at least now you can talk about it. If you don't like football but seems to be what your sig. other does for 3 hours on sunday, plop down and watch while you work on your own hobby. Sometimes presence is a present itself. Who knows? Perhaps learning the game you'll get into it too. Making the effort, we can often discover why our spouse likes do to these things.

I found out my spouse hated putting away clean dishes. This is good, because I hate dealing with dirty dishes. The plan? Spouse takes care of the dirty, I put away the clean. For responsibilities we both don't like, we trade them off. This time I do the laundry, next time I take out the trash, etc. Sure, we can go with traditional roles (men mow the lawn, women vacuum the rug) but if they really really don't like doing them, perhaps a swap is in order.

[edit on 30-7-2008 by saint4God]

reply to post by seagrass


Oh I can dress up haha. I recently went to my younger sister's graduation and got a lot of "You look so slick!" I like to wear black suits, black shirt, and a nice stylish tie to formal events; and I always throw my mane in a ponytail when I'm going out somewhere nice.

I think its fun to shock people when they see me "cleaned up" as it doesn't happen often.

reply to post by saint4God


Sounds like you're a great and thoughtful and attentive husband. Others could definitely stand to learn from your example.

Has anyone else noticed that women tend to be much more likely to try to find common ground with their significant other than men are? It seems to me that women are much more willing to watch a football game or cheer for the home team than men are to read a book their wife read or take a trip to one of their favorite places. Why does everyone think that is?

So many women, so many differences aswell!

I have always been inbetween the stereotypical genders when it comes to what I like and how I express myself...thats exactly how I feel!

My voice is rather girly and my face isnt masculine really ( big eyes! ). Often I get called a miss on the phone if its someone that doesnt know me. IT makes me angry yet also a little bit blushing inside...I secretly enjoy it!

Oh well...combining my voice with my looks ( mid long hair dyed black and purple) and my clothing makes me come off a little confusing to people. Some really dislike me for that and a few have a kind interest in me.....too bad its mostly greasy old men lol

Never been in a relationship with a girl even though I would want to....I guess Im just not what they seek for...more of their "gay friend". Sometimes I think "Am I gay and I dont know it?" ,,But then I think of sex and I just like women too much :\ Im ashamed of my sexuality because of my genderexpression aswell.

But the mystery of women ...hmm...I dont know really....sometimes I totally dont understand male behaviour and sometimes female behaviour is odd to me aswell. The main thing Ill never really understand is the desire for kids....but I think thats just a bioligical thing since I dont have a womb!
I think im too tender, too emotional and too well..pretty to be a real guy ...and Im too sexually interested in women to be a woman



Hope this thread will continue