Ok here goes, by popular historical demand, I am posting this thread in hopes of helping our men out there. I don't know if this will work, or even help, but it seems I have been noticing a lot of comments from men regarding the mysteries of women. I have laughed pretty hard in one recent thread describing women as "evil need machines" which soon became ugly. In another I saw us described as 'insane and fantasy based". Which actually concerned me a little.

Why do men find us so hard to comprehend? Why do some men feel we are an enigma that can never be solved?
They describe us as materialistic, insatiable, inevitable cheaters, and this is just here on ATS.
Why do we have such a bad reputation amongst men? (Never mind the other side of this coin please. Women feel the same about men I am sure.)

So this is an attempt to understand the psychology of women.

I am not sure where to begin... Perhaps men could post those questions they have always longed to ask, but were afraid to? Give us scenarios, or tell your experiences, and perhaps some of our ATS women will be willing to shed some light.
Or it could just get ugly like most of the others....
(you can't say I didn't try)

So Ladies, I will put the first question out there... "Are we fantasy based?"

Is the women's restroom really populated with Adonis-like male servants that attend to all your bodily comforts?

I've envisioned it as being furnished with chaise lounges, harp music, water fountains, etc.

women are impossible to understand because they dont even seem to understand themselves. I would agree with the insane fantasy based perspective. Ive had girls say they like mystery and the chase, so then i stay distant, then they end up with some other boyfreind... then you decide to be straightforward with them and they say they want more mystery.

good god it never ends, i need a beer.
im a pisces rising also so i think it makes things even more difficult haha.

Originally posted by LLoyd45
Is the women's restroom really populated with Adonis-like male servants that attend to all your bodily comforts?

I've envisioned it as being furnished with chaise lounges, harp music, water fountains, etc.

You can be my architect anytime! I like your creative mind. but no. Not the ones I hang out in.

Sorry if I sound sexist here but....

Some women are very unstable and can act really crazy and go through mood swings alot ect ect ect.
And make women very hard to understand.


So as a male this can be very annoying, and when you try to help them when they get like this they just seem to get pissed off at you.


So I think this is mainly why women are seen in a negative ways by men.

Originally posted by TheRepublic
women are impossible to understand because they dont even seem to understand themselves. I would agree with the insane fantasy based perspective. Ive had girls say they like mystery and the chase, so then i stay distant, then they end up with some other boyfreind... then you decide to be straightforward with them and they say they want more mystery.

good god it never ends, i need a beer.
im a pisces rising also so i think it makes things even more difficult haha.

No# 1 problem with that is that you aren't being yourself. Why should you try so hard to please anyone? If you are a straightforward person, you should attract like minded women. If a woman wants mystery she will probably search for it in many men. Women do like the chase. I think because of a combination of evolution and animal instinct. We do want to be "sought". It makes us feel valued. If you try pretty hard to get us, it looks as if you really like us. But most times I have found that men who act like that, are sometimes only interested in a sexual conquest. On the other hand, relationships that evolve out of friendship first usually are less mysterious, but more stable.
I'm sorry about the Pisces rising, he he. It does make us want to help the world though.
I am just one woman though. I can't speak for all of us.

What a good thread, I am looking forward to seeing what all turns out here. As a male myself, I have a few of my own questions, mostly regarding attraction.
What do women like in men? Sometimes, you see women that go for big muscle men, and others that go for the small yet nice guy. Do women like it when guys care, or when men act like, well "men" as big, not caring and brute creatures, as portrayed by the media. Now, I'm not concerned with attracting women, as I already have a girlfriend (so I must be doing something right ) but in the end, it's kind of confusing as to what women like.

Big muscle and no feelings,
or slender and caring?

Just wondering.

Originally posted by theendisnear69
I would like to know why women always pass up the good guy and go after the a$$hole?

Seriously why do they do it? Maybe they have some fantasy about bad guys that turns them on.

Women always say O I can't find a nice guy. And those of us who are nice are standing right in front of them

Good question! I have done this.
The a$$hole, is usually cocky and self-confident appearing. They are usually funny, have a lot of friends, and seem as if they might be fun, social, and well, confident. Which is attractive. Since they are attractive to many women they have their choice of women and usually cheat. Because they can.

Men who are nice aren't usually in the spotlight. They stand back against the wall, and usually are sizing up the situation. They are not usually very outgoing. They are harder to meet and get to know because they don't take a aggressive stance in meeting women like the A$$hole. Most women I know are not good at making the first move or even want to. They expect men to do that. Which is a fine art, to say the least.

Originally posted by 5ealchris
Sorry if I sound sexist here but....

Some women are very unstable and can act really crazy and go through mood swings alot ect ect ect.
And make women very hard to understand.


So as a male this can be very annoying, and when you try to help them when they get like this they just seem to get pissed off at you.


So I think this is mainly why women are seen in a negative ways by men.

ah, my favorite question. You guys have testosterone. It is worth it's weight in gold.
We only have it when we are ovulating. It makes us feel good and energetic for only a short time. You guys have it all the time. Our hormones go in cycles for child birth.
We do get emotional, and crabby, and weird, and we can't help it. Even if we are logically aware of such things, at the time it seems perfectly valid.
If you try to help us through it, we feel even more crazy, because we feel we need to change something about us that we can't. During those cycles we need understanding, and for you not to get irritated with us while we are certain to be irritated by almost anything.

Originally posted by For(Home)Country
What a good thread, I am looking forward to seeing what all turns out here. As a male myself, I have a few of my own questions, mostly regarding attraction.
What do women like in men? Sometimes, you see women that go for big muscle men, and others that go for the small yet nice guy. Do women like it when guys care, or when men act like, well "men" as big, not caring and brute creatures, as portrayed by the media. Now, I'm not concerned with attracting women, as I already have a girlfriend (so I must be doing something right ) but in the end, it's kind of confusing as to what women like.

Big muscle and no feelings,
or slender and caring?

Just wondering.

Each woman has a different idea about that. Me personally? I like men who are not too muscular. Too muscular seems like a fascination with their own bodies. Someone who is sexually oriented only. But that is just my opinion.
Too slender is not attractive to me either. I like a man who knows what he thinks, and will say so, but have enough compassion to understand others as well. I am not attracted to uncaring brutes. In fact I will most likely leave the room.

Crap I posted a long post and when I did a spell check I killed it, grrr.

Anyway,

I have been married to a wonderful man for 11 years.

I can tell you what I looked for. I looked for someone who had a positive self image.

People that are insecure, are very unattractive. They are also the ones that
never trust a girl because they cant believe she is with him in the first place.
Some of these real NICE GUYS, also are very insecure. It is very unattractive.

My husband is very quiet, but very sure of himself. We have no trust issues between us. We are raising a confident daughter.

I have been with men who are too needy in the sense they always need to reassured. I do not want a baby, I want a man. I want a healthy relationship.

My husband is not all muscular, but he is cute, loyal and trusting. He is also not a pushover.

But there are different types for different people. Thats what makes us great

Ama

I love diamonds too. They are a hobby of mine. Not just diamonds but all stones.

A diamond just has a look no other stone has. If she wants one, get her a blood free diamond.

it is so nice that some men actually try to inform themselves about women...

cranial implosion eh? ha ha ha
I can see your point clearly.
I don't like diamonds. I like turquoise and silver.
Sounds like your girlfriend has diamond issues.
I crack myself up.
She probably wants the "good" diamonds. The ones people didn't die for. Do they exist?
Ask her what diamonds represent to her. Status, love, beauty?
Ask if there are other ways she can get that. I don't know.... I don't have diamond issues.

You can have confidence and not be a jerk. Confidence is key for women. Kindness is expected along with that. If we are going to put our trust in someone to take care of us and protect us, we need that confidence as insurance. Besides, it says, I don't need you, I just want and choose to be with you. Even though we do like to be needed. Is that complicated enough?

[edit on 29-7-2008 by seagrass]