Hello there.

I've been on ATS for just about a year now, most of that time under the name indierockalien. I had the penchant to bash religious people for being weak minded and foolish and easily led. It was very wrong of me. I probably never seriously hurt anyone's feelings, but looking back, I made a complete a-hole out of myself by doing this. Who am I to judge people's hopes?

It would be a shame to live in a world where nobody had any hope beyond just what can be physically seen, and whether you do that through Christianity, Islam, Hinduism, Taoism, Buddhism, new age, general spiritualism, the most important thing is that you believe, and even better, that you KNOW that life is not all about what can be seen and touched and grasped and owned.

Myself lately, I've come to a very curious crossroads. I've had some very revealing experiences... but I don't think I know enough on my own to truly make perfect sense of it all and make peace with the blinding light of truth. Do I take this spiritual path on my own? Do I trust myself to random new age sometimes cult-like methods? Do I take that often confusing and disturbing journey inward by way of my own flawed judgment on something that's bigger than all of the minds in the galaxy combined? It is within me, but can I trust my ego to guide me fairly?

Quite the contrary to my old Christian bashing ways, I've decided that Christianity seems to be the way to go. I'm not talking about Orthodox Christianity. I have seen too much to take the Bible literally. I'm talking about the path of Gnostic Christian Mysticism.

A member of this site emailed me about a few of the posts I had made, and said that he was a Christian mystic, and I should check it out. I don't think I emailed him back right away haha. A curious thing happened, though. I was at Borders, looking through the metaphysics section, when all the sudden I saw this book just sticking out at me, like it was begging me to pick it up. I was hesitant because it had a big picture of Jesus on the front... but the title intrigued me to no end.

It was called Gnosis of the Cosmic Christ: A Gnostic Christian Kabbalah by Tau Malachi. Not only was the phrase Cosmic Christ pretty bitchin' sounding, but it was just the most synchronistic of events because only a day or two prior, this person had u2u'd me about Gnostic Christian mysticism.

Reading the book a bit, I was amazed to find out that much of the Gnostic Christian teachings are very much in line with my philosophies about the universe. I had, within the last year, come to a conclusion during meditation that within every single individual thing on Earth, there contains the potential for the whole. Everything is a fractal of itself. Which means that everything is God. We are all God, underneath all of our layers. This is what the Christian Kaballah teaches. This is what Jesus taught. This is what the mysteries of every religion teach.

I have no choice now BUT to have faith the Jesus was exactly the thing he claimed to be. I feel the kind of burden he must have felt, only the difference is that I don't have all the esoteric knowledge of exactly how it all works. I just know the beginning and the end, and that knowledge alone is too heavy to bear all alone like this. I have read quite a few pieces of the bible and the gnostic texts that confirm my knowledge to be 100 percent accurate. Read the Gospel of Thomas, and you'll find many references to it.

It's very strange, me running headfirst into all of this. Even though for the longest time I was an athiest, and even when I was into spiritual matters but against any form of religion, I had always been attracted to the story of Jesus. What would it have been like to be the Messiah, the bearer of such HEAVY duty knowledge? It must have weighed on his conscience like a ton of bricks. One of my favorite movies was always The Last Temptation of Christ.
(Willem Defoe as a tortured and disturbed Jesus? What a great idea!)

Anyway...

Mainly, I'd just like to send my apologies to all the faithful out there. Maybe you have certain dogmas I would still disagree with, but the important thing is that you have faith in something more than this fallible flesh.

Unless you are a spiteful pessimist, you cannot deny the beauty and truth in much of what Jesus taught. You could say it was all made up, and that Jesus never existed... but then you're missing the message, and instead shooting the messenger, and that is the definition of ignorance, my friends.

Thank you and peace.

We all make mistakes but I am glad you came out and shared this with us. You know I was in the same path but I was mostly bashing Atheists. I realized how foolish some Christian sounded first hand. Long story short I quit dealing with mainstream religion.

Good for you.

Nice post.

I've had some very revealing experiences... but I don't think I know enough on my own to truly make perfect sense of it all and make peace with the blinding light of truth. Do I take this spiritual path on my own? Do I trust myself to random new age sometimes cult-like methods? Do I take that often confusing and disturbing journey inward by way of my own flawed judgment on something that's bigger than all of the minds in the galaxy combined? It is within me, but can I trust my ego to guide me fairly?

I can completely relate to that statement.

ithin every single individual thing on Earth, there contains the potential for the whole.

You should check out "The Holographic Universe". It is pretty fascinating and would certainly add to your theory.

Just wanted to add: that is not far from the belief of panentheism, which basically is the idea that all things are within God, but the difference being that God is still separate, and greater, than the sum of the parts so to speak.

Originally posted by dunwichwitch
I had the penchant to bash religious people

Heh heh heh, YOU TOO EH !!!

Yeah, when I was here a couple years ago, I was "that" person. I may have been your predecessor, lol

But now, I stay out of religious threads. All of them. I think I was in 'one' when I first came back a bit ago, but felt that electricity in my head as I was about to go off in a post, so .....

I just try to be flexible now, would rather enjoy myself then get all bent out of shape.

Cheers to ya for standing up

Misfit

While on the subject of everything containing the all, I feel like it's important that I post this video again"

Nassim Haramein's Unified Theory of a fractal universe AND MORE:

Google Video Link

It is amazing how I come up with this fractal reality theory during meditation a year ago, and just recently I've found all sorts of people and texts from both science AND religion AND alternative theory AND metaphysics that all say the same thing, sometimes using different words.

Christian Mysticism, once you get deep into the teachings, teaches you how to gain access to all these levels of the fractal reality within and without you, it seems. The holy sefiroth and the tree of life being kind of metaphors, and as you will see in PART 2 of the Nassim Haramein presentation, possibly a coded key towards building free energy machines that use the energy drawn from the singularity (God!) within everything.

The implications on both spiritual and technological concepts concealed within the mystic traditions must be brought to light, as well... and it's weird that I stumble upon this video of Nassim in addition to everything else.

All religious people should definitely open up to the true nature of the foundations of where their beliefs come from. It is so much more than the dogmas! Jesus is within you, mang!

Nassim part 2:

Google Video Link

Well... I definitely am not God right now. I am a human and an independent spirit, and I'd like to say that way... but the thing that seems so neat about Gnostic Cristian Mysticism is that it creates a pathway, it seems, to be able to constantly have that union with God and everything, yet still be yourself... but being the true person within you... the Christ Self, they call it. It is you, but it is the you that you would have always been, had you been without all of the fear and the falsehoods we cover ourselves with in order to cope with being alone in a world that is pushing us to conform and give ourselves away in order to live in fear of death.

I think it's a great idea to eliminate that fear of death and the need to be preoccupied with the gain of material things (which is also a byproduct of the fear of being finite), and that is what is at the HEART of the teachings of Jesus. He was throwing a big flippin' bird in the face of the reign of the power structure that binds man to mental slavery. If you give man the light of their true selves, they cannot ever be controlled by anyone or anything ever again, and they will also learn infinite compassion... and there would truly be heaven on Earth.

I always counted myself as an athiest until recently, and being a zoologist, science was always my understanding of the world. But science never held all the answers to my questions. I then realised I shunned my spiritual side not so much because I didn't believe in a higher power, but because I didn't agree with 'religion'. Science is really just another 'religion' when you get down to it. True scientists are starting to understand this. When strange things happen in the world around us, like paranormal activity, telekinesis, even remote viewing, why does science not properly investigate these things? Why are they ridiculed? Yet, science spends money on useless experiments with conclusions that are really just common sense. 'Breaking news! Fish feel pain!'. Really! Wow! You could've fooled me! Sheesh. How many fish did you torture to find that one out.

Kabbalah really opened my eyes, mind and soul to myself and the world around me. It's made be a better, more understanding person, and my journey has only just begun.

It has taken a lot of bravery for you to start this post and apologise for your actions. That's a good start to your personal journey.

I wish you all the best on it.

Thank you, Dunwich!
When I asked Jesus to forgive me and come into my heart the first time, I felt so clean and loved!
I eventually went to those I had hurt and asked them to forgive me.
Many were surprised to say the least!
Jesus is a Good Shepherd and if you ask him, and follow His voice, he will lead you to all the places you need to go.
When I first became a Christian, alone, with noone to guide me or take me under their wing, The Lord saw to it that I had the right material (in spite of bad leaders.)

He is the ONLY reason I'm alive and sane today.
I don't know much about gnostic christian kaballa or anything.
Jesus told me to stay in the simplicity of His salvation(through His Word, The Bible)
When someone tries to get too complicated and act like they know extra-biblical teachings, I reflect on how I got saved. As a child, asking the Father for help and guidance.
Believing in His Son.

I think it was really cool that you've been compelled to apologize. It takes a person of true character to realize things we need to change about ourselves and totally applaud that . Of course you're forgiven by Christians, it is a very very core concept in the faith.

"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." - Luke 6:37

jmdewey brought up some good point though, and would like to to see what your response is to the following:

Originally posted by jmdewey60
I think these concepts should be within our grasp from reading the canonical Gospels.
The Gnostics created their own gospels in order to introduce their own concepts that Jesus did not necessarily teach.
I do not think full-on mysticism is the way to go.
What if you die before you attain your own salvation?
Would it not be better to rely on a salvation, already completed in Christ?

In my opinion this is not unlike apologizing for bashing spammers or any other con-artist. Religion is a fraud, Those who promote religion are frauds. After all the atrocities committed in the name of some imaginary spook throughout the ages , it is high time we stop tolerating this form of fraud and treat those who conspire to commit it the same as we would any other fraudster. Incarceration.

I tend to agree that Gnostic Christianity is the true faith.. I also feel that people should leave other people's beliefs alone. Life without hope of something would be very empty for me indeed... Physical life is not much in my honest opinion and if there is nothing afterward , then I just have to wonder what this # is for. You know?

Originally posted by jmdewey60

As for people's beliefs, well, if you want to put them out, you have to expect some questioning.

Maybe so. However, do you honestly believe that any of us are qualified to know what is ultimately true and what's not? I don't.

Originally posted by SpeakerofTruth
do you honestly believe that any of us are qualified to know what is ultimately true and what's not?

To add to that ......... qualified to know what is best for the other person? I don't KNOW the other person, how can I speculate that he would be a better Chrsitian than a Catholic, or a better Jehova Witness than a Wiccan. It's that other persons life and thought process, not mine.