lol @ the tattoos. i only laugh bc i have one and it is absolutely ridiculous that i wouldn't even say what it is on here lol. and that was during a
personal drunken phase i was going through to try and "fit in".
i am not sure that i was always aware that this was an illusion, but i definately was never one to not question things (except for my brief "drunken
phase"). i have always been curious and contemplative.
i, too, am at the point that i feel i CAN'T quit. i do sometimes wish i could, but i think that to stop now would be worse since i have started this
i also question whether i am in the right when i try to talk to others about it bc at times it is very scary and you know the saying "ignorance is
not sure what makes us different, but there certainly does seem to be a division happening.... whether it seems that way bc i am becoming more aware
or if it is a legit assumption, i am not sure.
the closest friend i have (feeling a connection to) doesn't come on here too often although he says he has lurked for quite some time, just to read
things. he seems to be more aware than i am, but he will only answer things if i ask the right questions
something is formulating in my mind and it drives me crazy not knowing the big picture.
i even sometimes question if i really DO want to know, if that makes sense. like is the big picture gonna be something good or something bad? but
alas, i keep moving forward in this, unable to stop.
and you alluded to it, about the time going quickly...... seems like the more pieces that come together, the quicker time goes and more and more
information flows through my head. i really don't even HAVE to be on this site to have information flood into my head (has been happening before this
site found me even)
[edit on 13-7-2008 by justamomma]