You know, as much as I hate atheism, I've always been less-than-enthralled with the idea of going to Heaven and playing a harp or just
lounging around in paradise, doing nothing, for the rest of eternity.
What's the point?
To me, it would make much more sense if God and Jesus and Buddha and Muhammad and all those people had phrased things a bit differently — like,
Yes, you will have a job in Heaven, so you must pass the entry examination, which is called Life.
To me, that would be sufficient incentive to obey the scriptures or whatever. Yeah, a job in Heaven or Nirvana or Mecca, etc.
Something to challenge me and keep me busy for eternity, like defending the universe from interdimensional invasion. Something like that, rather than
just taking strolls down the golden streets of Heaven, listening to the birds sing, all day, everyday, for the rest of eternity.
But it also got me thinking... Maybe this Life is training for some position in the Afterlife. Perhaps that's why religions are so
inflexible about their policies — because we're being tested to see if we can follow orders in preparation for our employment
on-high.
What's the first command that God laid on Adam and Eve? He ordered them to avoid the Tree of Knowledge. What do they do? Disobey orders.
Bam, got 'em kicked right out of the Garden of Eden. If you look at the Bible from the perspective of orders followed and orders disobeyed,
you start to see that every story in the Bible is about God giving orders and humans either obeying or disobeying them. The Bible would be
only half as thick (or less) if people had simply followed the original orders, rather than wandering off and doing their own thing.
So... What if this whole world, this whole Life, this entire universe is just a training ground, a boot camp, to prepare us for some extraordinary
challenge in the Afterlife? Maybe that's why we're always told, in every religion, that there is only one way, and THIS is the way,
to weed out the non-hackers who can't follow orders (those would be atheists, pagans, witches or whatever) from those who can follow orders
(those would be saints, I suppose).
This makes the game a bit more intriguing. And exactly what are our new and demanding positions in the Afterlife? Bodyguards for God? And
why would God need 35 billion bodyguards unless there was something larger and more threatening than God?
Well, that's just an example of where your imagination can take you, particularly if you're not satisfied with the prospect of loafing around
watching Doris Day videos and drinking cold beer with 72 virgins for all eternity.


