NASA's fear of "little people"

If NASA could do all the space work they are currently doing for half the cost, would they do it?
Apparently the answer is NO!
Why?

Think about the enormous savings to the public if we ran a midgets only space program! Everything would be half the size, thus half the costs. NASA could build everything like the shuttle, the space station, and space suits at half the size, if only they would use midgets.

So why doesn’t NASA deploy a crack unit of midgets into space?
Because they fear that a well trained group of midgets, once in control of the space station, will begin work on a moon base to launch attacks on the Earth. This is illogical and absurd! Midgets have lived along side us for years in peace.

Midgets have been given a bad image by the media in movies like “Willy Wonka” and “Seed of Chucky.”

They are not to be feared!

Brilliant. I never thought of it that way.

I'm not sure if you're serious or not?? But thanks anyway, that's really cheered me up.

midgets???

do those people suffer from midgetism ? no. they're dwarves. they suffer from dwarfism.


midget sounds derogatory. be as you wish others to be.

Originally posted by trilateral_insignia
midgets???

do those people suffer from midgetism ? no. they're dwarves. they suffer from dwarfism.


midget sounds derogatory. be as you wish others to be.

Actually, there is a difference between little people ("midgets" as the OP has called them) and dwarves. Little people suffer from malformation in their bones and limbs whereas dwarves are just smaller versions of adults, normal proportions, just smaller.

There are at least two reasons for not using midgets:

1. They are less than "normal" people, making it more difficult to find midgets that can work as astronauts.

2. The fact that they do not have the correct proportions makes it more difficult for them to make all the moves a "normal" person can do.

Originally posted by ArMaP
There are at least two reasons for not using midgets:

1. They are less than "normal" people, making it more difficult to find midgets that can work as astronauts.

2. The fact that they do not have the correct proportions makes it more difficult for them to make all the moves a "normal" person can do.

I disagree. Midgets, when properly trained in science, physics, and martial arts, could become a viable source of front line protection in space. If the ISS were to be boarded by hostile aliens, they could launch a coordinated attack like wiener dogs on a postman. I believe that the weightlessness of space would give them the matrix style edge they need.

Yeah why not use midgets? We might as well go back to the Apollo program while we're at it since they can't seem to figure out how to get back to the moon. If only midgets went they would be able to fit inside easier.

As someone else mentioned, there are health differences and they would most likely not be capable of handling or passing the tests to pass as an astronaut. Although, I think dwarves are proportionate like a child.

That's like saying over weight people would make better candidates because they have reserved body fat in case the food ran out.

If there's a little person that can pass the testing for becoming an astronaut, I don't see anything wrong with them joining.

Since there's been reports of small aliens, it wouldn't surprise me if they were well received by them either. Some might even suggest this is where this cross breeding mutation happened.

For all we know, what you suggest is why some aliens are so small. Instead of space suits, they had sub compact space bodies for long flights.

I have no problem with who we employ in space, neither for or against any size.

However, I do have to wonder about this thread on an "evil midget takeover" basis. You see, I noted the thread number as found at the top of the page. This is thread is number "360606", and as such has some overtones hard to ignore.

3 = the trinity; an attempt to copy the "God Plan" often used by evil angels as a code for validation. This also implies that by gaining the "heavens', they will attain to the very seat of the Christian concept of the Almighty.

0 = nothing at all, which is a subliminal message to we humans that there is nothing to all of this; to not worry, "nothing to see, move along". And since these numbers are the visual representation of eyes without irises, reinforces the notion that the plan could work unseen by mortal men.

666 = is of course the needed signature that by tradition, and maybe even devine edict, needs to be added to every end of the world program concocted in the Abyss.

I am now trying to trace the source of this idea to see if this really is a "Hell of an Idea" to take over the world, and space.

With tongue firmly in cheek, I now return you to the original programing.

Interesting point, there are signs everywhere if one only digs a little, no pun intended.

As for the midgets turning on us once they have full control over space, I think it is unlikely at best, but we should be cautious and have a plan to defend ourselves from them if needed. Safety is paramount.

Although often docile and harmonious, I have heard that if a spurned midget gets cornered, they can become agitated and lash out with the strength of a spoiled teenager high on energy drinks. Space exploration is important, but we must remain cautious.

Originally posted by super70
I disagree. Midgets, when properly trained in science, physics, and martial arts, could become a viable source of front line protection in space.

My problem is not with the training, as I said before, the fact that there are less midgets than "normal" people makes them a less available source.

How many midgets do you know in person?

If the ISS were to be boarded by hostile aliens, they could launch a coordinated attack like wiener dogs on a postman.

And why couldn't "normal" people do it? Because they are bigger? Doesn't that depend on the size of the aliens?

I believe that the weightlessness of space would give them the matrix style edge they need.

That I don't understand, weightlessness affects all people in the same way, where do you see a potential edge?

Originally posted by super70
If the ISS were to be boarded by hostile aliens, they could launch a coordinated attack like wiener dogs on a postman.

Since you mention it let's send wiener dogs in space. Maybe they're not as smart as midgets, but they're much less heavy. Their cylindrical body fits perfectly in tubes, the basic shape of every rocket.

Look at this awesome specimen:
Irresistible, huh?

Only one race of dogs is superior to the wiener dog, the midget wiener dog. This is why: according to Tsiolkovsky's equation there is no limit to the final speed a rocket can achieve with a small enough payload. Considering how wiener dogs are the natural candidate for future astonauts, the best species for conquering the galaxy may be a race of miniature wiener dogs, a. k. a. nanodogs.

It would be an interesting experiment to send one of these little people who have abnormal bone growth to work at the space station. Because, I have heard that the weightlessness of space has an effect on bone density and this might reverse it to some degree. Again suggesting they may have been partially alien travelers at one time also. The short time in space might also cause this to accelerate once they return.

Smaller people like dwarfs can sometimes be hampered with medical problems,such as limbs and heart.I would think they would be more prone to having problems up there then a normal human.

Originally posted by super70
So why doesn’t NASA deploy a crack unit of midgets into space?

this single line made me spit my kool aid!

good fun!

[edit on 13-6-2008 by Danger Girl]

reply to post by aleon1018


The reduced gravity affects the deposition of calcium in the bones, making them more fragile.

The lack of exercise also affects the bones, and that is one of the reasons astronauts have to spend some time doing some exercises.

I think we should send up fat nerds - they basically have their own space suit, and the oily residue would make for an excellent lubricant.

I'm not sure what the lubricant could be used be for exactly, but it would be still be useful for something.

There'd be no risk of them taking over the world - despite the fantasy of doing so, the fat nerds would be too lazy to put the plan into action.

Originally posted by ArMaP
reply to post by aleon1018

 

The reduced gravity affects the deposition of calcium in the bones, making them more fragile.

The lack of exercise also affects the bones, and that is one of the reasons astronauts have to spend some time doing some exercises.

I think you and i share the same truth behind our opposition to this idea. I'll get to that later, however.

You could easily design a body suit that would mimic the ideal environment for a midget. Boom. Problem solved. While we're at it, why not throw in a poison dart gun or two? One in the cuff of each arm.

Now, i think the reason you're really not on board is the same as my reasoning.

I just don't trust them. They're shifty. Especially the smart one's. The one's smart enough and disciplined enough to become astronauts would be virtually impossible to defeat.

The best example we have of a "little person" in space is none other than mini-me. Mini Me absolutely HANDLED austin powers in the moon base. Say what you want about bone density and proportions, but the facts are there.

I can't believe this is actually being discussed seriously. It's funny as all hell, and I applaud the OP for his inventiveness, but c'mon, this is clearly BTS material. Hell, I'd still be involved with the thread because it is entertaining, but a midget astronaut conspiracy? I've officially heard it all. Good good stuff.

Seriously though astronauts need to be in peak physical condition, and midgets inherently have many health problems and generally don't live that long to begin with. I'm not opposed to the idea but basing an entire space program around midgets is a bit much. I say whomever is fit to fly should be able to go, and if there happens to be a midget or a dwarf that can contribute to the team then I'm all for it, no need to send up tiny spacecraft.... unless you think they could relate to the grays better than a standardly proportioned individual.