No Sex Before Marriage

reply to post by rjmelter


I have to ask this one, what if earth is hell? What if we're the lowest of the low, afterall everyone on earth tends to suffer. Maybe we're hell and after us is heaven

On the other i'm agnostic and i try and argue every side i can

lol its cool. Earth does seem like Hell, in Revelations it states that Heaven will come down to earth... so perhaps we were in hell the whole time anyways... Its an interesting theory. More so though these people had dreams and all dreams are symbolic so I doubt that every ounce of their dreams are literal.

I used to be Christian, but growing up with the Christians I have, i've pretty much denoucnced Christians themselves and follow the guidance that holds up true of all religions. Its funny though, they are almost all the same...

It could be true, After studying much psychology I've found that there is much more to the Bible then meets the eye, its like a 13-D Puzzle, there is so much there its not even funny. I wonder sometimes if maybe all that is written is correct, but only once it enters our mind. I think our soul knows the truth and can sort it out for us. However if its not true, it does teach many great morals for this lifetime and more.

IN finding my own balance on this matter and others I do relate religion because I find spiritual belief should be the primary guiding factor... I could be wrong... (cocky... and doubting it lol) But I believe if you choose to make a child in your own ignorance you should raise that child. If other factors occur and you made no choice then I believe that choice is between you and God/Creator/ Silent In Control Being/Self. However i have found that the uneducated dont really know they are ignorant and are uncapable of understanding the decision they are making. I want to cry for them. It burdens my soul though, knowing that I cannot change what they've done, I can only help them and guide them to a more clear path. So Sex Before Marriage... I do not know I only wish that In my Dreams the anwsers would become clear and I wish that the Ultimate Truth would be revealed because I am tired of guessing and sometimes making the wrong decisions when given the wrong facts.

reply to post by Cuauhtemoc


haha ok, i thought you were being serious. Thanks for clarifying things. I thought you were talking about a scenario in which you get married, and then 2 weeks later, you're not.

reply to post by cosmicstorm


I said most girls/guys, not all. What you want is not always what you get. What you desire is not always what you strive for. Every person on the face of the planet truly wants someone to love them genuinely. I'm not saying otherwise. I'm saying that our society is geared in such a way that the possibility of that happening has been thrown out the window.

People aren't putting up much of a fight. They're settling for what's easiest and convenient. The quick fix.



[edit on 5/20/2008 by JPhish]

reply to post by Freenrgy2



My statement was a JOKE,

What about those of us who never plan to marry because we believe it to be an out-dated, over-rated, ideal.

I think that the importance of marriage is for the stability and security of your children. But you don't have and don't plan to have any children, then it serves no purpose.

And can we please stay on topic. All these side conversations about abortion aren't addressing the issue.

Basically what’s wrong with having sex before marriage – I have come across no real reasons that suggest sex before marriage is wrong….

I don’t understand how being married can make sex more special….. If you have sex with person you love, what difference does make if you’re married or not?

What if I stay with the person I love for the rest of my life without marriage, how does marring them make a difference?

Look at the bigger picture, it's not about the sex, and not about the marriage, it's about the children that can come from it.

Currently in this world, and pretty much since the dawn of civilization, a married couple can raise a child much, much better than a non married couple can. Non-married couples tend to run into many financial problems while attempting to raise a child, especially more than one child. Granted this is starting to not become such a big problem, because most people just leech off of the taxpayers via welfare these days.

If you're going to have sex, children can come of it that IS the point of having sex, after all. Sure sex feels good, sure we have urges to do it, but look at the whole picture, mother nature just made sex feel good for we would do it, for we would reproduce. Even if you are "responsible" and use "protection", **** happens. To me, being "responsible" means getting married before having sex, or at the very least, getting married as soon as you know she's pregnant.

So no, sex before marriage is not some kind of NWO conspiracy. It's just the more intelligent and responsible thing to do.

Or you could get your girlfriend pregnant, decide she is not a woman you want to spend the rest of your life with, and ditch her. Of course, now you'll have to pay child support to the tune of $500+ per month for the next 18 years, for a child you'll never see again. Of course, this wouldn't have been a problem if you had waited until marriage to have sex.

reply to post by AgentStovkowski


I agree with you to some point, but I don't think that marriage is so important. If I love the person I am living with, I would never do anything harmful or bad to her (like making her pregnant against her will). Marriage doesn't confirm love, so it doesn't matter for in my case.

But that is like that in my case and it probably won't work for the whole society, because most people are not so responsible and honest as me. I'm not trying to be arrogant, don't get me wrong.

It's a question of taste, take it as you like.

[edit on 21/5/2008 by miga11]

Originally posted by andre18
What if I stay with the person I love for the rest of my life without marriage, how does marring them make a difference?

to be frank with you, no two people can stay with each other for their entire lives without marriage, it just doesn't happen. have u ever seen an old couple who were together like 50 years who werent married.

living with someone for 'the rest of your life' without marriage is impossible because the moment the first argument starts is the moment he/she closes the door behind him. there is no knot that ties them together, no obligation towards each other and there is no reason to be faithful, jumping from one unmarried relationship to another becomes a tendency.

btw, people should consider getting married, you never know when that awful day comes when you might get amputated or have your face burnt or become infected; who will want you then? any of these things can turn your promiscuous life into a life of loneliness just like that.

[edit on 21-5-2008 by DuneKnight]

reply to post by AgentStovkowski

a married couple can raise a child much, much better than a non married couple can -financial problems

Say what!....that makes no sense, how does being married help raise a child....? How does being married help financially

Or you could get your girlfriend pregnant, decide she is not a woman you want to spend the rest of your life with, and ditch her.

There's no difference between that and a divorce, you get her pregnant, decide you can't handle a baby in your life and divorce her...... “now you'll have to pay child support to the tune of $500+ per month for the next 18 years”

[edit on 21-5-2008 by andre18]

Originally posted by ImaginaryReality1984
reply to post by rjmelter

 

I have to ask this one, what if earth is hell? What if we're the lowest of the low, afterall everyone on earth tends to suffer. Maybe we're hell and after us is heaven

On the other i'm agnostic and i try and argue every side i can

I'm sad you feel this way ImaginaryReality.

I'm also sad that after so many partners you seem to feel so cynical about women and marriage. It is true of course that formal marriage as recognised by the state is can be abused (especially by women) for material gain, especially with our divorce laws favouring the woman.

As far as sexual experience goes, what you say is so true, but in a relationship if you pay attention to the other person you get that experience within the relationship. You don't need to share yourself around for that.

Your argument that you sleep around to benefit your future partners so that you may better please them seems a little disingenous, then again, maybe I'm disingenous. While I waited for true love my husband shared himself generously. Perhaps I benefit from his experience, and a return to the old double standard is called for...

I still hold that the consequence of casual sex is not pregnancy or disease (they can be avoided) but misery and loneliness.

Your sad and cynical postings do nothing to convince me otherwise (you sound like all the reasons to wait for the right person).

I don't believe that we are in Hell, Hell must be hopeless and life on Earth is not without hope. But that is getting off topic...perhaps another day.

Originally posted by DuneKnight
to be frank with you, no two people can stay with each other for their entire lives without marriage, it just doesn't happen. have u ever seen an old couple who were together like 50 years who werent married.

FYI...many people cannot stay together for their entire lives whether they are married or not. Marriage doesn't guarantee a couple will stay together, though it does cause some people to stay in unloving or unhealthy relationships when they should get out.

living with someone for 'the rest of your life' without marriage is impossible because the moment the first argument starts is the moment he/she closes the door behind him.

I'm sorry but this statement is just absurd. No relationship is without arguments or disagreements of some kind. People have different opinions and being married isn't what causes a relationship to stay together after an argument. Love and the ability to communicate and compromise, as well as accept the fact that they won't always agree on everything, is.

there is no knot that ties them together, no obligation towards each other and there is no reason to be faithful, jumping from one unmarried relationship to another becomes a tendency.

I have been in a faithful, loving relationship for almost 8 years and I can assure you that there most definitely IS a "knot" that ties us together. The fact that the state has not sanctioned our relationship means nothing.
In fact, I was married for 3&1/2 years and didn't experience any of the things you mentioned above. My ex-husband was abusive, selfish, and a liar who thought I wouldn't leave because we were married. He certainly felt no obligation towards me just because we were married.
By contrast, in my current relationship, it is the knowledge that my significant other and I are together because we choose to be and not because we have to be that reinforces the bond we share. We are faithful because we love each other and would never want to cause each other pain, not because we have some piece of paper saying we have to be.

btw, people should consider getting married, you never know when that awful day comes when you might get amputated or have your face burnt or become infected; who will want you then? any of these things can turn your promiscuous life into a life of loneliness just like that.
[edit on 21-5-2008 by DuneKnight]

Do you really think that simply being married can protect you from getting dropped like a hot potato if you become disfigured or terminally ill? It is the love one feels for their mate that causes them to stick around when something like that happens...not the fact that they are married. Those who don't love the ones they're with aren't going to stick around when the going gets rough, but those who do love their partners will stick with them through thick and thin, wedding vows or not.

I also have to say that I resent to notion that procreation is the primary reason for sex. I have made the decision not to have kids. Does that mean that I should not get to have sex? Or, since marriage is a prerequisite for sex which results in children, do the rules about premarital sex not apply to me? Is bearing children and raising a family the only reason for marriage?

JPhish.... i know you didnt mean ALL women were that way... i was just representing the ones who aren't!

I completely agree with your last post..

Originally posted by AgentStovkowski
Look at the bigger picture, it's not about the sex, and not about the marriage, it's about the children that can come from it.

Currently in this world, and pretty much since the dawn of civilization, a married couple can raise a child much, much better than a non married couple can. Non-married couples tend to run into many financial problems while attempting to raise a child, especially more than one child. Granted this is starting to not become such a big problem, because most people just leech off of the taxpayers via welfare these days.

Well i seriously argue with that point, i know a fare few unmarried cuples with children. The children seem well adjusted and perfectly nice. The financial thing is true but only because the legal and welfare systems favour married couples. If this were changed i think we'd see far less marriages. Long term couples with children should get the same benefits as married people in my view. You could almost call it discrimination.

Originally posted by AgentStovkowski
If you're going to have sex, children can come of it that IS the point of having sex, after all. Sure sex feels good, sure we have urges to do it, but look at the whole picture, mother nature just made sex feel good for we would do it, for we would reproduce. Even if you are "responsible" and use "protection", **** happens. To me, being "responsible" means getting married before having sex, or at the very least, getting married as soon as you know she's pregnant.

Why exactly does being responible = marriage? If you get someone pregnant and just marry them that sounds quite irresponsibel to me. the marriage won't last and so you'll probably have to get divorced a few years down the line and how will that effect the child? Not positively i reckon. Furthermore divorced people tend to not get along, whereas if you stayed unwed, looked after the child and helped support it you could remain friends.

Originally posted by AgentStovkowski
So no, sex before marriage is not some kind of NWO conspiracy. It's just the more intelligent and responsible thing to do.

Well i must be quite stupid then because marriage to me seems like a bad choice, unless you look simply at the financial benefits to it regarding the unfair welfare system.

Originally posted by AgentStovkowski
Or you could get your girlfriend pregnant, decide she is not a woman you want to spend the rest of your life with, and ditch her. Of course, now you'll have to pay child support to the tune of $500+ per month for the next 18 years, for a child you'll never see again. Of course, this wouldn't have been a problem if you had waited until marriage to have sex.

It wouldn't have been a problem? Well if you were married you'd still have to pay for that child, and currently you can ask for access to your child (at least in our system) unless you've got a criminal history or history of abuse.

Marriage is outdated, plain and simple. The only reason i can see for it is the financial benefits of the welfare systems. For the people who think marriage is a way of "showing" your love for someone well i have to ask. Why do you have to show it so publicly? Does that really matter? If you're with someone for 10 years or lnger then i think your love is pretty self evident.

I think there should be available a commitment ceremony, a declaration of love that would not be legally binding like marriage but would allow yo uaccess to the benefit system just the same as a married couple.

Originally posted by DuneKnight
to be frank with you, no two people can stay with each other for their entire lives without marriage, it just doesn't happen. have u ever seen an old couple who were together like 50 years who werent married.

I can name you two couples from my own life, hows that one? They're quite unusual i suppose being unmarried in their day, they got some stick for it as well. Whats more, they seem far happier than all the married couples i know, in fact that seems very common. The married seem depressed the unwed seem rather happy.

[edit on 21-5-2008 by ImaginaryReality1984]

Originally posted by DuneKnight

Originally posted by andre18
What if I stay with the person I love for the rest of my life without marriage, how does marring them make a difference?

to be frank with you, no two people can stay with each other for their entire lives without marriage, it just doesn't happen. have u ever seen an old couple who were together like 50 years who werent married.

living with someone for 'the rest of your life' without marriage is impossible because the moment the first argument starts is the moment he/she closes the door behind him. there is no knot that ties them together, no obligation towards each other and there is no reason to be faithful, jumping from one unmarried relationship to another becomes a tendency.

btw, people should consider getting married, you never know when that awful day comes when you might get amputated or have your face burnt or become infected; who will want you then? any of these things can turn your promiscuous life into a life of loneliness just like that.

[edit on 21-5-2008 by DuneKnight]

Only reason you don't see people who have been living together for fifty years, is because people in their 70s are from the oldschool pre-birth control era and all got married like good little sheeple. If we're still around 50 years from now, you'll eat your words buddy, I promise you.

The reason the church does not want anyone to participate in sex outside of marriage, especially young people is merely ectasis. Pure and simple...ecstacy. Orgasm may lead to communion with deity's and the spirit world is embraced. It is a mystical experience which is best comprehended by direct personal experience. The ecstatic experience - of contact with deity - is, perhaps, one of the most central and pivotal mysteries that can open up people to a connection to "god" in a way that no church or religious structure could ever do. Many people have orgasmic experiences that take them out of this world. They are fulfilled and no longer seek fulfillment through a religious structure or church. The church attempts to control the people's need to be fulfilled with spirit by constantly attending a meaningless ritual. So they have created "sex" outside a marriage to be a filthy sin. Is that the most ridiculous bunch of bunk you ever heard!!!

OK, let's put this in perspective. We are animals. We are programmed by our DNA to make more of US. How do we do that? We have sex. Just like every other species on the planet (and perhaps in the cosmos...). Why is that so hard to understand?

Sorry to take away from the ideals of romanticized love and to be so cold about it, but that's the way it is. We are programmed to reproduce, hence the sexual urge in both women and men. Some of us are fortunate (a debatable term, I know) and find romantic love AND a sexual parter in the same person. Some are not.

As for the abortion debate going on here. I am male. I will never be pregnant. As easy as it would be for me to make a judgment call on a woman who chooses to terminate a pregnancy, I will never walk in her shoes. I'll leave it at that.

Originally posted by Mad_Hatter
Not to mention that the Bible was written by man 400 year AFTER any event in the book happened under the assumption that God told him to what to write.
[edit on 5/20/2008 by Mad_Hatter]

I'm the only one who caught him trying to slip such a huge lie in there? The texts of the New Testament were written between 10 and 100 years after Jesus' death. Now I agree with you very much on the fact that it probably has been edited over and over again by the Catholic Church to fit their agenda at different times in the past 2,000 years since, but the bible was not written 4 centuries after Jesus' death-- that is absurd.

Threads that discuss what the Bible says about topics like homosexuality and premarital sex basically boil down to this:

If you want to have premarital sex then that is your right. If you want to practice abstinence then that is your right. If you want to practice heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual sex then that is your right.

However, do those things out of your own free will and don't try to 'rewrite' or reinterpret the Bible in an effort to justify your lifestyle. The Bible says what it says on such things and that is that.

This comment is not directed at anyone in particular or the Original Poster- just a blanket statement in response to the amount of threads that have been posted lately concerning the Bible and sexual social issues. Christianity is not the only religion that teaches sexual restraint and purity- almost all of the major religions do. I don't see those texts being dissected to find an 'out.'

If you don't want to follow the Bible's teachings then don't but don't try to rewrite the Bible because you feel guilty about something you are doing and want to find a loophole.

1. No Sex before marrage was to make the Birth of Jesus a virgin one.
Mary was getting freaky.
2. It was to make you feel bad. To make it a sin. To make you flock to the Roman Catholic Church to save yourself. So the RC could have control....Scare-tactic.
3. It was population control.

Marrage by the state is so they can track you better because you have to fill out more paper work. The government also offers incentives like extra tax money back to you so you have to register the kids with them. So they know about them.