My Alcoholic Roommate is completely INSANE!

My god, I don't know what is worse the days upon days of binge drinking, the constant slander against the democratic candidates, the blatant racist remarks, the comparison of Hitler to Jesus, the nonsensical babbling that I just end up tuning out or the sobbing at movies that aren't even sad. For god's sake Coyote Ugly isn't even a sad movie! WTF! STOP CRYING *snip*! It's a freaking MOVIE for crying out loud!

I should buy a keg and leave for a few days. See if I come back to a alcohol drenched corpse.

*snip* it I should just move. This dip is just a waste of a good liver. What a waste of my time to try and help this looser.

mod edit: removed profanity.

[edit on 4-4-2008 by UK Wizard]

...is this another drunk post? lmao
Are you serious, he actually cried from watching Coyote Ugly?
Now thats some funny !

How long have you guys been living together?

reply to post by Givenmay


Only a few months, I actually knew that he drank a lot from when we worked together, but I had no idea that he could actually drink for 24 hours straight. No sleeping just beer after beer after beer. I couldn't believe my eyes I woke up the next day and this Mother is still up still drinking!

and no I haven't been drinking yet. It's basically the middle of my day.

Which brings me to another point, How the do you wake up in the morning and start ing drinking? Who does that? I think I would last about two beers then I would be out again, then feel like crap the rest of the day!

And Yes SOBBING AT A FREAKING MOVIE! Not only Coyote Ugly but other films too! He starts getting wasted then he starts crying at comedies!

[edit on 4/4/2008 by whatukno]

reply to post by whatukno


Maybe it is best for you to part with him...He might cry though!
I could'nt drink like that!

I usually have to wait until it's good and dark to pop the top, then when the sun comes up, I sleep!

I think it's time you either got another roommate or got a place of your own to live in. I would have too many problems staying with a person like this myself.

Least hes off to work now. Peace and quiet will endure for the next 9 hours. (course I will be sleeping for a lot of that time)

It's a curse of mine to come into someone's life and help them along their path. This guy used to be an Air Force Captain. He only needs 4 years at some government job to qualify for retirement. Then he would never have to work another day in his life and he can do whatever he likes.

I had tried helping him get into some federal job somewhere. I.E. Post Office or the local port. I got him the applications, set up an interview for him at the port, I got him the appointment at the post office test center. But his drinking gets in the way. If you can't show up to an interview sober they aren't going to hire you.

I guess some people don't want help. :bnghd:

It just urkes me to no end to see someone self destruct like this.

Everyone knows everyone for a reason.. You know your roommate because you are supposed to for some reason.. What do you think it is?:bnghd:

Wukky, does he go to work drunk too?
His job isn't going to last long if that's the case, then it will be you stuck paying the bills for both of you.
They say if you want to know exactly where you will be in 3 years time, look at those closest to you. If you don't want to be like him, get out now.

Sorry to hear about your luck Wukky. Sounds to me as if you need to just get out of there.....This guy sounds to old for a babysitter. Good luck.

reply to post by whatukno


I used to live with a person like that. As another mentioned, if he is showing up to work drunk, that won't last very long.

The other concern I have is how is he getting to work? Is this person driving drunk, putting other people at risk?

You ought to rent some movies to watch that show the consequences of living a life in a haze.

There is an old movie called "The Days of Wine and Roses." It's old, but it stars Jack Lemmon, and the point of what happens to people like that is still appropriate. Rent that one and see if he cries!

Having witnessed alcoholism in my own family, I think it is important that you do what you can to help this individual. If he or she does not want your help, then there is nothing you can do. And that is the impression that I get here. But if this individual is open to help, getting them this help might be a good idea.

It's not normal to drink for that length of time, or to wake up in the morning and start drinking. Everything you describe points to an inability to control themselves with alcohol.

1. Protect yourself.
2. Do what you can to help this person.
3. See 1.

reply to post by ElectricUncleSam


The only thing I am good at in life is to help people with their lives. Heck even though my life sucks I am compelled and good at helping other people better themselves.

It's what I do, I get involved with other peoples lives in order to help them make a better life for themselves. This guy however doesn't take my advice, doesn't seem to care where his life is headed and I fear that if he doesn't check into rehab soon he is going to drink himself to death.

However as they say and it's correct, unless a person wants to help themselves no one else can help them. Rehab would do him absolutely no good unless he knows he needs it and wants to change. I got involved with this guys life because he has a goal that is so easy for him to achieve, yet he seems to defeat any attempt at me helping him achieve this goal by his drinking.

reply to post by AccessDenied


No he actually does not go to work drunk, hungover drunk maybe but he sleeps enough where I think that he goes to work somewhat sober. He does work every day, but the second he is done with work he goes to the bar or buys a case of beer and brings it home and he starts off getting trashed. I just don't understand his logic. (If he has any)

reply to post by kleverone


Babysitting is the right word. I just wanted to help this get to the point in his life where he can take it easy. I mean 4 years at a cakewalk federal job? Seriously who among us wouldn't try hard as hell for 4 years in order to live out the rest of our days making a good income that would certainly make retirement comfortable for him, instead he seems to just want to blow this off and drink himself to death. Again I question his logic.

reply to post by Enthralled Fan


Ill try your suggestion thank you, heck if he cries at Coyote Ugly he would certainly cry if something hits a nerve. He doesn't drive, he car pools with others at his job. So that's not a concern. (thank god) He works construction and I know some days when he wakes up he still is a little buzzed, so I am concerned that he might get injured on the job. (mandatory blood test might show alcohol impairment)

reply to post by chissler


Yes wise words Chissler, indeed it might be time for me to abandon this project and find someone else that needs my help that is willing to accept it.

Thank you all for your insights, I appreciate your posts. I don't want to abandon this guy but as kleverone aptly stated he is too old for a babysitter and I don't want to end up like him as suggested by AccessDenied.

It's unfortunate though, 4 years is all he would have to do at some federal job to qualify for full retirement at one rank above Captain. I looked at this once and it would be a comfortable retirement for him. But I can't make him show to an interview sober.

Not everybody may agree with this, but after witnessing it all throughout my life, studying it extensively through university, and now dealing with varying issues with the individuals I am employed to support, this is a disease. It is not a personal life choice. Granted, at one time or another it was his choice to begin to consume alcohol. But I assure you that there is a genetic predisposition that left him vulnerable to this disease.

It's not as simple as saying "thanks, but no thanks" at this point.

He needs professional health and he needs to be the one that says "enough is enough". Unfortunately, this rarely happens before he or she hits rock bottom. Loss of employment is typical for the rock bottom that alcoholics hit. While an individual can maintain full time employment, they can hide behind their disease and say it's not that bad. But once they don't have that shield to hide behind, they are exposed for the infected person that they are.

At this point in time, you are nothing more than a crutch to a sick person.

Hopefully he understands he has a disease before it is too late and gets the appropriate treatment.

Your right Chissler, if he does not realize that he needs help he will never get it. I have tried to help him as much as I can. Unfortunately I cannot make him stop drinking. Nor can I force him to seek counciling. So it perhaps is better if I just leave and let him self destruct until he hit's rock bottom as it is me at this point keeping him above water as it were.

reply to post by whatukno


I don't know how well you know your roommate (I assume somewhat well if you live with him) but if you feel the need to go that extra mile, how about asking him to go to an AA meeting with you?

Once he's there and lands a sponsor, he will be scooped up and it won't be like you have to really keep on going.

If he doesn't want to go, and doesn't want to rehab, there's not much else you can do. As Chissler said, and I wholeheartedly agree, it is a disease, but not only a generic disease. It is progressive.

Drinking in the morning is certainly not a good sign, and it will get to the point where he self-destructs. Not necessarily by harming himself, but with a roof over his head, food, money. Its only a matter of time if he doesn't get help, and if you still live there and accept things the way they are, so you will be affected by this as well.

I hope it all works out for you.

As has been said before: he is an alcoholic and that is a disease. You are part of the disease by enabling him. At times tough love is needed and perhaps an intervention. You can talk to an alcohol counselor and they can help arrange it.

As long as you enable him in any way, the disease will get worse. But it is your connection that needs to be looked at. You cannot rescue an alcoholic, nor can you fix him. We attract who we attract, and there are no mistakes when it comes to addiction and why we attract whom we do. You will need to look at this if you want to avoid others with this disease in the future. I have a great deal of experience in this area. I would recommend Alanon for you as a 12 step program, dealing with friends or family members of the problem drinker, or user.

Lot's of wise words here. Whatuknow, don't get caught up in the drunk drama. It's entirely up to him now at this stage of the game. I used to drink like that. It now has to be his personal decision or the law will eventually get involved and make the decision for him usually because of a DWI. Let's pray he doesn't hurt anyone else.

Good Luck!!

Constant insulting of democrats and constant racist remarks...you must be living with my fiances best friend! I love the guy, he will give you the shirt off his back if you need it, but everytime something bad happens to him he blames the liberals and minorities!

Anyways, I hope you are not being an enabler. The last thing an alcoholic needs is an enabler. I remember my last experience with an alcoholic, my soon to be brother-in-law. He would drink a whole bottle of whiskey, run around the house trying to boss everyone around, screaming out things like "If you disrespect me then you disrespect God" and "I am next in line to be king." All these tyrades and abuse he has done to all of us, we put up with it for way too long. Finally we cut him out of our lives for good.

reply to post by whatukno


Maybe you should give him a copy of the book from whence your avatar is based. I read and now I can drink without the insanity. They keys to Guilietta and world peace lay quietly in the contents of a hollow frog- once opened and ingested- one can find peace in the discovery of a peach fish!

At least the next time they get drunk- you will have wisdom in common to talk about.

Remember- no matter how bad things get- no matter what species you are- things are always worse somewhere else:




If it's time to move on- it is time to move on. Good luck!

[edit on 4-4-2008 by dk3000]

They keys to Guilietta and world peace lay quietly in the contents of a hollow frog- once opened and ingested- one can find peace in the discovery of a peach fish!

Ah, the poor alcoholic! Dreams of grandeur, and brilliance. Well put!!
Ah, the poor mouse! What can I say?

"But I'm not so think as you drunk I am."
- Sir John Collings Squire

[edit on 4-4-2008 by MatrixProphet]