Cheers to the OP for posting this, you've said something that I've wanted to talk about for a long time, but felt that no one would take me
seriously or truly understand. So, Cheers.
I'm 23, and like many others on this thread, I do not feel connected to anyone in my age group. I feel older and above the everyday that people my
age normally do. I just can't get into drinking, partying, clubbing and the like. I also do not have the same view on relationships either. Most of
my friends are getting out of college and moving on to careers and marriage or kids, and I...well its just not something I want right now.
I have always felt, different then the rest of the world for most of my life. For a long time I just felt that it was normal to feel separate, but as
I got older, it started to sink in that perhaps there was something wrong with me, but I soon realized that my normal wasn't like everyone else's
normal. And it was a hard fact to accept that I wouldn't fit in, no matter how I tried. Like a previous poster said, it would be easier to be
ignorant about the world around us, and really take everything for face value. But I just can't do it, ignore what I see beyond the everyday.
For most of my life, I've had vivid dreams. Dreams that feel so real, when you wake up you have a hard time discerning what reality is. When I was
younger, probably 7-9, I had a deathly fear of the dark. I do not remember what started it really, but my mom told me that walked in on my parents
watching x-files, and if you've seen that show you know the aliens that show up on there. I don't know if that was the catalyst or it awoke
something but, I had trouble sleeping after that. My dreams became more vivid. I remember hearing conversations in my room or growls, cept no one was
there. I remember seeing people walk past my bed, some would look, others would ignore me. I don't "remember" being abducted, but I do remember 4
distinct times when my body would become really numb, kinda like i was in a trance, then my bed would start hovering, and do 2 complete circles with
me in it, and then it would fall to the floor, and the room would go white. Then I normally remember being somewhere else. The last time it happened,
i remember going to this city of water. Atlantis.
Like i said, i don't remember being abducted but, I'm afraid of aliens. Not all though, just the greys. I can't look at them without my stomach
going into knots, and my hair standing up. I can't watch the end of close encounters of the third kind, but I can stand ET (unless he's screaming)
I also, now that I'm older to understand what was happening to me when I was younger, can see spirits/ghosts. If you believe in that sort of thing.
Most of the time, they don't talk to me, but If your wondering what its like, its like seeing normal people just semi-transparent. It freaked me out
for a while but I got used to it, and now its just another normal thing for me. I also can see shadow people, like I said, if you believe that sort of
thing. Sometimes its a person, other times its a creature of some sort. Anyone else experience this also?
And I could talk all day about this, but I wont, since I have babbled enough already. Its just been a while since I've felt calm enough to open up
about these things. I felt I was the only one, and lo and behold, others feel the same way. Oh, and I do feel like I have a higher purpose. That
something is calling out to me, yet I have no clue what its saying-except for something is coming. Something big. And when it gets here-I feel a lot
of things will change.
I hope this thread can stay alive, if not, feel free to message me. I'd love to hear feedback.