How to survive as a mother with 2 young children?

This is a question I have been pondering for awhile. I have read the posts on what to have stocked up, etc. BUT... what if you are a single parent with two young kids? What would be in your survival pack? How much ammo do you pack (for a P99), how much food? What if there was an infant, I doubt in the time of need the grocery stores will be selling baby formula. I hope that the suggestions here will enable me to start a survival pack (or whatever you call them!!).

In the event that these things will be needed I want to be able to be prepared to keep myself alive and my children alive. I know most of the people on here have very extensive packs set up and ready to go. However, keep in mind that there are alot of "city folks" who need step by step instructions (especially those of us who have young children). In the event of the survival of the fittest I want to be ready.

reply to post by goopity


If you want to get started getting ideas for a survival kit, you can get full kits and lots of ideas through ready-made ones. Just do a quick google search, and you can start to get some ideas.

There's also some EXTREMELY high calorie meal replacement type supplements you might want to check out. A bit of one would be enough for the day. Iodine pills to purify water. A knife with a built in survival kit in the handle. Lots and lots of things to consider. Those would be the top 3 things for me. And of course a first-aid kit.

[edit on 2/14/2008 by bigbert81]

With a young infant I think breastfeeding and ensuring the continued flow of the milk would be one of the most important ways to keep them alive, Cloth diapers would be essential as disposables will run out, along with that some wool or polarfleece type wicking nappy covers.
Childrens or infants tylenol to help bring down fever which in young infants can be highly dangerous.

And a good sling....not the commercial babybackpack type ones, a good slin that can be used from birth through age 2 or 3 to lug them around comfortably with hands free would be essential.

If you cant breastfeed there are some old fashioned recipes using condensed milk...or carnation powdered milk or something...google them for more info

Im teaching my nearly 7 yr old to build a campfire from scratch right now.
This is for two reasons, one by taking the mystery and stigma away from fire he will be more likely to respect it and not play with it needlessly
But also because I firmly believe it is the single most important survival skill and so many people are blessedly stupid beyond belief when it comes to building a fire.

Kids need a lot of fuel for their growing bodies with super high metabolisms, this year his appetite has gone through the roof, he can eat more than me sometimes and is growing so fast it amazes me...so think high value foods with a good balance of carbs, fat and protein.
Mulitvitamins with calcium which could be hard to find and is essential for growing bones and teeth!

I also have some crayons and paper, a ton of batteries for his handheld game player...it would eventually run out but it is incredibly useful in a pinch when i need him to settle down and be quiet for more than 2 seconds. I also have a couple of small beanie baby type animals and his blanket..which he would kill me if anyone know I said he had lol!!

As a mother of one with one on the way, I have noticed that many women think that men will just protect them, you should try and learn about how females in warring countries deal with their lives, the dynamics behind finding a mate. Love may not be a question in an after situation. Teach your children silence from an early age. Study how females in other countries avoid sexual assault. What I think is most important (though many people have called me insane (females) and a handful of men have called me sane) ,learn about a serious handgun , (1911 or 45) , shotguns ect , learn to use and store them without fear , stock ammo and be ready to kill if need be to protect your children. Study and Procure a conceal and carry in your state (If possible) and be aware of how to protect your self.

Many people prepare for small short term events.
Kits won’t prepare you for a situation where the social infrastructure flips and you and your children become drains on other resources. YOU should learn to be completely self-sufficient. Learn to not need anyone’s help.

I also suggest that you study and think about what you would do if sexually assaulted with a resulting pregnancy (which could potentially become a drain on your resources and your children's)

Most females I know don't prepare for the big picture scenarios , I Do and I know that I and my children will benefit from my preparation.
Also learn an indispensable and hard to acquire survival skill that can make you valuable to a group (Spinning, weaving, intense agricultural knowledge, herbalism etc) don't teach others, keep the skill to yourself and your children. Increase your own value in a social structure through hard to attain skills

Just My Opinion (A Mom and A Survivalist)
LK

I have two boys and my husband travels alot so I'm kind of like you, however my boys are 9 and 11 now. I've always instilled in them the very real possibility that anything and everything could happen at any moment and preparation is always key.

I have basic survival kits packed for each of them in backpacks that they know where to find and can grab in an emergency.

I've also been teaching them basic stuff, like fire starting, gardening, using slingshots, and how to help get our house ready if we ever have to go into a "shut down" mode. Being that we are in a hurricane prone area it's not too difficult to go from basic preparedness to a little more detailed situation x type preparedness without causing stress or fear in the boys.

Now as to how much of everything you should have stockpiled or in your kits..... it's up to you what you can afford, how much you carry and store.

Remember you have young kids who might need you to carry them too, so a bunch of canned foods in your kit isn't going to help much and only will weigh you down. You need to assess what your family likes, will eat, has a good shelf life and go from there.

You have asked a great question here and as I have read the best answers are already flowing.
One thing I would suggest is to start experimenting with make shift water purification such as distilling. You can go online and find a million ways to do this. I liked the one I read about turning the shiny silver side out on a bag of potato chips for catching the solar rays.
Dehydrated foods are always a great choice, you can even sew little pockets into your bug out clothes to stash stuff in which frees your hands to carry more. A small sled with or without wheels works great too.
Good light weight walking shoes are a must and take with you extras in the next size up as kids grow so fast.
The most important thing to take is good seeds. Not the genetically modified type. Potato eyes are also great carried in a zip lock.
Get to know people within the maximum walking distance of your home, this could be up to a hundred miles or more, and have a shared plan.
Once you have done all you can to be as prepared as you can to be self sufficient, RELAX, and enjoy living your life and life with your family. When others are freeaked out and scrambling, you will kick into auto mode and be bright , clear, aware and ready. Always keep an open and positive mind.

Originally posted by survivalwoman
Also learn an indispensable and hard to acquire survival skill that can make you valuable to a group (Spinning, weaving, intense agricultural knowledge, herbalism etc) don't teach others, keep the skill to yourself and your children. Increase your own value in a social structure through hard to attain skills

I so agree with that. It amazes me sometime the reactions I get from my female neighbors when they see me with a hammer and nails, working outside with a shovel, digging up the yard or even crocheting while lounging in the sun. It's like I'm some sort of "freak" to them, yet what I do is nothing more than basic physcial labor, but they can't comprehend doing it for themselves and rely on their husbands instead. I hate saying it, but it seems the best skill my female associates have is "shopping". they can find and buy anything they need.

Important basic skills I think all women should know....

butchering (how to skin, cut, clean meat and seafood)
basic gardening (dig a hole, plant a seed, tend a crop, composting)
crochet/knitting/sewing
basic woodworking (hammer a nail, saw wood, make a box)

intermediate skills:
herbalism (growing, drying, creating tinctures, etc from local herbs for natural healing)
massage therapy (call it healing hands or whatever)
(with the above two, you can be a very valuable asset to your group)
candlemaking
soapmaking

advanced skills would be things like ham radio operator, proficient with firearms, etc.

A great way to get your kids involved and open to possibility of "whatever" is to use local instances to practice survival skills and preparedness. Tuesday night, Florida had some bad weather, with tornado watches and warnings. I used that instance to make sure my kids were prepared in the event a warning was issued for us and we need to take action. While warnings were popping up all around us... we calmly got our packs, filled some water (we didn't go overboard, i was confident we were safe) and made sure our "safe room" (closet under the stairs) was accessible and ready for us. Thank god we didn't have to use it, but it was cool to see that we were all able to find exactly what we needed and have it ready so quickly. Depending on where you live you can use similar instances to teach your children readiness and preparedness without fear and panic.

reply to post by survivalwoman
How can you not teach others a survival skill if you have the knowledge to do so?

What if your child falls and gets a nasty cut? You see some one stitching someone else's cut. Does she share her skill of suturing or does she keep it from you?

Times of great stress in a survival situation require us all to share our knowledge and help each other when possible.

I was raised on a family farm and have many useful talents which I will gladly share with my fellow survivalist.

What you sow so shall you reap.

I hope you will rethink the idea of being selfish with your knowledge. IMHO greed is one of the things that have caused our world to become the place it now is. Without the greed of others we would probably not have to worry about situation X being caused by man.

Dizziedame

reply to post by dizziedame


dizziedame

I Didnt Say ALL Survival Skills , But A trade specific skill that makes YOU as a skilled tradesman of more value.

The one who knows more is more valuable , and thus the valuable survive longer.

A Trade , If you are the only one who knows what Plants can be made into fiber materials , and it keeps you a valuable and protected member of a community , are you gonna teach it to others in such a fashion that they no longer value you because they ALL have the skill. Loose you protected place and that of your children.

You should try reading the reply as : "Also learn an indispensable and hard to acquire survival skill" : A Hard to Aquire skill. A Trade SKill .

Greed can lend to survival lasting longer. When it has its due place .

I Once met a woman who's survival plan was to come to me. I had to sorely inform her , I provided for me and mine and would not take care of her just because she was a friend.

she could gather her own resources.

I Would and Will not let someone eat the food i stocked for my children just because they were there.

and as such , people should go about aquireing THEIR own skills .

reply to post by goopity


I've been a survivalist for over 30 years. I've also raised 5 kids by myself and taught myself many skills. My children learned right along with me. We made a game of it. One of their favorite games was "stealth". They would try to walk quietly so as to "sneak" up on me without me knowing. They eventually got pretty darn good at it. I always praised them for their efforts and pointed out how they could have been more efficient.

No matter how small they are, children can learn survival skills. I came home from work one day and my (then 2 1/2-3 year old, can't remember exactly how old) was performing CPR on her teddy bear. Correctly, too. She had her "patient" with a splint on it's leg and a nicely done field dressing around its head. She calmly informed me that it's temperature was 98.6.
Kids are surprisingly strong, too. My oldest child would carry around her brother that was 4 years younger. About half her weight. I don't think I could carry half my weight around for long.

Children can be made to fetch wood for a fire, clean things, help care for younger siblings, etc. Cooking is a simple skill that you can teach them right away.

I've taught my children self-defense, fire-making, plant identification, gun safety and use, skinning, tanning, cooking, herbal medicine, first aid, and, most importantly, how to read. I taught them that first. If SHTF before they had learned all the other skills, they could at least read the survival book I had packed in each of their bags and learn to fend for themselves if I wasn't able to fend for them.

There's a survival forum here on ATS with lots of good ideas to get you started. There's also a lot of females that can give first hand experience in survival information: what works, what doesn't, etc. Don't think of yourself as handicapped because you're a female with kids.

Great post. I to think that you should learn an indispinsable skill. Teach you children to be quiet, it is extremely important, especially if there are those prowling about that would do you harm. Teach them to follow orders the first time without question. This may very well save yours and there lives. If they are arguing about a request or demand it might get all of you killed. It is very tough but they need to learn. [As an aside note. Someone once complimented me on how well my children listened when I said it was time to go. I told them that they all had to left somewhere at least twice before they understood I was serious. By the way they were left at either our church or family where I knew that they would be safe.] You will need to get serious with this. Teach them at an early age to be self sufficient. It is already there that they want to do for themselves, let them as much as possible. They will learn to get their shoes on the right feet soon enough. Remember that in the earlier years of our country children were responsible for much more than now. Teach them the proper way to fend for themselves. Always be positive when they fail! If they are wanting to try something let them as much as is safely possible and never say "I told you, you can't do that" Give them lots of love and nurture and they will begin to amaze you at what they can do. Start early on survival skill. This may be as common as not being afraid to be alone in the dark to fire starting to shelter building. I am sure there are other things I have left out., but there are many god posters here that are more knowledgable and eloquent than I.

Respectfully

reluctantpawn

I would think the most important thing for a single female parent of two is to be part of a survival group and have a plan where you all should go.

WOW! Thanks for the responses. I am definitely overwhelmed. I have never thought about many of the things that you guys have suggested. I am going to have to start to make lists. I agree that you need to know how to survive yourself so you can teach your kids.


I don't believe that being a woman w/ small kids is handicapping. I agree with survival woman in that we expect someone to be able to protect us. However, there comes a time when you have to be able to care for you and your own, nobody can do it for you.

I know I need to learn the basics now so I can start teaching the kids. I will definitely be going through the survival forum and find out what works and what doesn't.

Personally, with small children and possibly an infant, I'd say sheltering-in would be you're best, if not only option. There's no way you'd be able to carry enough supplies, use a weapon, and keep track of two or three small kids all at the same time.

You said you're an urban dweller, so plan for the most likely scenarios.. No lights, no power, no refrigeration, no heat, riots, etc..

Buy yourself some cheap kerosene lanterns with bottled fuel, plenty of disposable lighters and matches for starting fires, some warm blankets, a good first aid kit with plenty of Children's tylenol, cloth diapers, powder milk, and start building up a supply of food & Water that will last you at least 3 months.

Buy foods that your used to eating. You probably won't be able to get it all at once, but $10 here, $5 there eventually adds up.

Invest in a set of good deadbolt locks for your door. All the preparations in the World are useless if you aree unable to keep them.

Bugging out would be my last resort if I were you, but it doesn't hurt to be prepared for that eventuality as well. Learn a few basic survival skills like water purification, fire building, shelter construction, navigation, first aid, etc. Knowing these things might just keep you alive.

If you have a gun, learn how to shoot and maintain it. If you don't, when it comes time to actually use it, you'll be in a really bad situation.

reply to post by goopity


Ditch the P99 , and get Mossberg defender in .410 or .20 gage. Handguns are good for self-defense but they're not that useful for survival.

If the childern are old enough, they can carry a small pack. If your on the move, small children need to rest frequently and you won't be able to travel as far on a daily basis.

I have to agree with the last two posters. Your best option would be to stay put unless it is environmentally dangerous to do so. This would give you access to your supplies and and a known space to defend. The infant would be to handicapping for travel. Part of this whole survivalist thing is to be pragmatic about your own capabilities. I hate to say it but doubtful you would make it out of an urban area unassisted. That being said, I cannot imagine the scenerio in which I would see a woman solo with two small children trying to escape a SHTF situation and not attempt an assist.

This is not a sexist thing, in your situation I would endeavor to stay put as well.

The shotgun is a good idea in the defensive scenario. Although I do now know why anyone would go less than 12 gauge. Especially in defense.

[edit on 15-2-2008 by Mainer]

Luckily, I am proficient with a weapon. And yes, as an urban dweller, our survival instincts usually include knowing the quickest root to the gas station or fast food joint. As a kid my dad took me hunting and fishing so I CAN and have killed an animal. I think that if the situation called for it, most of us here would be able to shoot and kill without remorse if need be.

First and formost,
My compliments and applause for the thread as well as the women who have chimed in on this question.
I think I am probably typical in that I can get too involved in thinking as a man and have to be reminded that the survival needs and capabilities of our fairer sex should be addressed as thuroughly as my own.
I wll take small umbrage with the posts that seem to be underestimating what females can or can not do in a survival situation.
I will grant the physical differences between men and women, and i will stipulate there is a hardwire difference between the " warrior/ hunter" phsychology and the nesting instincts.
Those ponts being conceeded I have to note that in all primitive cultures it was the women who planted and harvested crops, who develpoed and perfected food preperations and preservation and it is always the female of any species that will most ardently defend the nest or home.
I have encountered women of aboriginal culters who were fighting alongside thier male conterparts and i can tell you I would much rather face a man than a woman defending her home and children.
I think as men we automaticly think of ourselves as the stronger of the two genders, but as a lady friend of mine noted to my embarassment , A woman can clean house. do the shopping, prepare dinner and be ready for her man to come home, all while carrying a 40 lb child on her hip.
My hat is off to you ladies. I just wish i had had a mother like ya'll when i was a child, and i wish more mothers would take these issues as seriously as you do.
I Know this is not technicaly helpfull advise, but i thought it should be said, and it comes from the heart.

I agree about the shotgun and for me it's 12 gage but the average woman is usually lighter built than the average man. That 12 gage packs a wollop. Don't lose the pistol though. You may need to defend yourself in quarters too close to maneuver a long gun and also you don't need to be unarmed while reloading. Always try to NEVER let yourself be totally unloaded. Also an evil minded person WILL use your children as a weapon to persuade you to cooperate. If at all possible never let anyone get you into that position.

Originally posted by crgintx
reply to post by goopity

 

If your on the move, small children need to rest frequently and you won't be able to travel as far on a daily basis.

Another idea for being on the move is the garden carts that are made to be pulled behind a rider mower. They are now light, with big wheels and collapsible sides.