The transformative power of love, and how to tap it

I wanted to share some of the little epiphanies and revelations I have had concerning the nature of love and its importance in the universe. I think most of us have some kind of abstract understanding of what love is. We certainly use the word enough to imply that it is always in the forefront of our minds and lives. We can feel it, and we can produce it, and feel ourselves what we produce. We have witnessed its transformative power, and we have seen it get crushed, or at least pushed aside by the opposing forces of ignorance and fear. But what is it really, and is it possible to open ourselves up to it in a practical way that will make a difference in our lives and the lives of those around us? First a little pseudo-science to lead into the subject…

I have thought about love over the last few years. During that time I believe I have gained a basic and primitive, but still valid, understanding of what love may be and how it might be quantified using some of the scientific understanding and knowledge we have piled around us. First off, love is a kind of symphony of notes. It has a complex and rich resonance, but unlike a standard musical note, it carries an infinite quantity of information. It is complex and multilayered, impossible to understand with conventional thinking, but nonetheless it can be felt and generated. We now know that all matter is only a resonance pushed into a standing wave that makes the vibrations visible to the eye and tactile to the touch. The universe itself seems to be composed only of vibrations that, when combined with other vibrations enrich or destroy. Love is the great enriching master vibration, and it spawns many other “positive resonances.” Fear is the flip side, and it can slide into hate.

Now, human beings, components of this universe, produce a song or resonance depending on their intent or state of mind. We can produce or channel love. It is not hard to do, even if you consider yourself to be a negative person. There is a practical, although, difficult approach. Here is how I believe I am doing it:

1.First you must forgive, or at least actively try to forgive, all those in your life who you feel have done harm to you. This is very challenging, but the trick seems to be in the way that we choose to look at those difficult experiences. Those who challenge us in our lives are often alerting us to lessons that we should take careful note of. When we become angry that is a very loud alarm signal that our fears are being confronted and we do not like it. Stop and look at the fear that has been unearthed by your anger, grab hold of it and do not let it go until you have analyzed it and understood what kind of effect it is having in your life. Dealing with your fear is absolutely crucial in this, since its resonance seems to stand in opposition to the vibrations of love.

2. Understand that your ego is a societal and cultural construct propped up by your limited five senses. When I talk about ego, I am not referring to love of the self (which is important). I am talking about the self-image that you maintain and calibrate in relation to others. Perhaps you believe that you are “smart,” you believe, maybe, that you are “wise,” maybe you believe that you are “quick to anger,” or that you are a talented businessman. All of these beliefs must be fed regularly with artificial mental constructs that are often times delusional—these beliefs are a bit like demanding mooches who will not get off your couch. The way to proceed (and caution is required…do not be too hard on yourself) is to actively challenge all of your beliefs until you are left with the most basic thing, or set of things. You know you are making progress if the process feel uncomfortable and a bit destabilizing.

3. Love requires action. Someone said that you know you have made a decision only when you back it up with action of one kind or another. Even in those moments when you feel nothing but contempt for the world, actions of love are still required, and seem actually to be even more effective. Call your estranged siblings (this is one of my big challenges). Give to a charity that means something to you. Hold the door for people. Force yourself to look the supermarket cashier in the eyes, and consider what her life might be like. Think of the child that she once was, and the old woman she will one day be. Imagine what she might be like as a mother, holding her baby and feeling powerful maternal love for the child—all of these thoughts should be background noise whenever you meet someone new. Give them a fair shot. In fact, give them more than a fair shot (this one took me a long time to figure out).

4. Be willing to subjugate your own needs to those of others. By this I do not mean not eating so that you can feed an unemployed friend. It means realistically determining what your most basic needs are and then being willing to sacrifice all but that for others in need. (This one is tough….I’m still working on it)

5. Reserve judgment. There are times when it is crystal clear that someone is behaving in a cruel and thoughtless way. Child molesters are beyond redemption in my mind, but for the vast majority of humans, there is a rich panorama of back-information that we cannot understand or ever be aware of that drives their behavior. As such, we should never be quick to judge and condemn. Every judgment of another person must be made in full and complete awareness of who we are and what our faults are. This cannot be done, so we should be very careful. Reserving judgment takes discipline and work because we live in a society of quick judgments, but it has an amazing transformative power.

6. When you begin to make progress and feel the change in your life, do not begin to congratulate yourself too quickly. Never let you ego begin to sing the siren song of “you are great,” “you are an evolved human being, so much better than others.” Trust me when I say this line of thinking is nothing but poison, and it runs in the opposite direction of your progress. A positive and healthy self-image is very important, but it must be balanced against a equally positive and healthy image of the potential of humanity.

7. The planet must also be loved. The planet is here to teach us a series of great and important lessons, and the first of them is to learn to love it as our home and teacher. It is not possible to take the more advanced steps towards a state of living love without also recognizing that the planet is alive and as such very much deserving of out gratitude and deep affection.

Best to you all.








[edit on 11-2-2008 by Silenceisall]