Random jokes, thoughts, and observations

Q. What two things does an attractive female have in common with a
parking space?
A. She's either taken or is 'handicapped'.

What they say about mind over matter is right, because if you don't mind, then it doesn't matter.

I had a friend who, when he was in college, got pledged to a fraternity. As part of his initiation, he had to jump over some lit candles. Needless to say, he got blackballed!

This same friend once tried to drink Canada Dry. They threw him out when he got to Toronto.

My most favorite George Carlin quote: "I've never f**ked a 10, but one night I f**ked five 2's. And I think that oughta count, man!"