It's certainly a pleasure to be debating again so fast on the heels of my debate with Byrd. I'd like to thank my fellow exhibitionist,
Semperfortis, for agreeing to this little exhibition match (I trust my opponent won't mind me calling him that- it's a little known fact, but
Republicans do in fact have a sense of humor about sex. How could they not: it's been 24 years since they last elected a president who wasn't named
Bush).
Now that I've offended many of you, lets do it.
The Pen is mightier than the sword.
Here we have one of those old adages which we most of us only pretend to, or perhaps wish that, we really believed. The saying originated in the play
Richelieu; Or the Conspiracy by Edward Bulwer Lytton. Even in that play it carried a qualification: Only under the control of great men did
Lytton say that the pen is mightier than the sword. As an example, the character Richelieu points out sorcery. Great, now I've got a pen and a magic
wand, and my opponent has a sword. Some would say I'm in big trouble. Let's face it: on the surface it isn't that convincing, and most of us don't
act as if we believe it.
We are fools for not believing it.
The power that comes from the sword is fleeting and imprecise. The power of the pen is fine and enduring.
The pen is mightier than the sword.
This principle is evident in the very design of human beings. The human body and the human brain are built to take maximum advantage of ideas, not to
take maximum advantage of violence.
Any doubt of that is easily resolved by our history. History does not belong to the best armed, or to the cruelest, but to the most ingenious.
Throughout this debate we will examine the function of the human brain and body as well as the rise and fall of empires, ideologies, and religions.
When we tie it all together, it shall be clear that violence- the power of the sword- is a cheap trick, and that an idea- the power of the pen- is the
mightiest and most profoundly impactful force known to man.
Point 1: The Human Body and Civilization
For some of us, myself included, this will be an unpleasant exercise, but I would like to ask you to look at yourself for a moment.
You are unbalanced because you stand on two legs.
You are slow: your top speed is probably somewhere between 6 and 12 miles per hour, and probably not for very long at that.
Your claws are pathetic- even if you don't chew on them.
Your teeth are mostly blunt and you can't fit all that much in your mouth (although we all have one uncle who never ceases to amaze in that
regard).
You aren't even that hairy (I hope).
According to many, the closest thing in nature to your flesh is the flesh of a pig: you taste like bacon.
You're not even hard to see, or nocturnal, or poisonous.
You are, quite possibly, nature's perfect food.
Self defense, by the standards of the animal kingdom, REALLY isn't your thing. Why hasn't your dog eaten you yet? (if your dog is a poodle or
something ridiculous like that, disregard that question)
The reason that your dog does not see a 160 pound bag of bacon bits when he looks at you is not because he loves you. He loves you because you are
smart and he is (comparatively) kind of dumb. You give him space, food, and time that you can spare, and he gives you everything he's got (even
bladder control, which I imagine is a really difficult concept for an animal who doesn't see anything unsanitary about licking its own butt). The
closest thing to a sword you'll ever need with your dog is a rolled up newspaper and even that is unnecessary if you know what you're doing. That's
a pretty smart bargain.
Human beings dominate this planet not by violence but by the ability to take advantage of ideas: The ability to civilize. We've got free hands and
opposable thumbs that allow us to use any tools we can dream up to solve problems.
This has given us additional resources. No longer are we hunters and gatherers who have only what we can accumulate through force. We cultivate, we
get more resources for less exertion, and as a result, we have soft but compelling power. This gives us domestication of animals that are superior to
us in terms of violent power.
Everything we have, including the very ability to forge a sword, is based not on violence, but the power of ideas- the pen.
Socratic Debate Option Invoked
I'd like to wrap up this introduction with a few questions for my opponent:
1. What was the single most influential violent event in history?
2. What was the single most influential ideological event in history?
3/4. Which was more meaningful, and why?
5. If were given the power to accomplish just one thing, for the purpose of improving the future for humanity, what would you choose to accomplish?

