gender help

It's been hard for some time now. No matter how many times i play through my memories i come up with the same answers. My brain thinks i'm a boy, tells me to say things like a boy, act like a boy, even think like a boy. I've even pictured myself as a boy in the mirror. But my body says that i'm a girl. no matter how wild it acts.
There are times when i even mistaked my gender at a weight lifting practise. It was directed at me the 'female' but i just laughed and all most said 'yeah, don't get any ideas now' only problem was i forgot that i was the girl and the one next to me was a boy. I am at a loss. Evey where i check it's 'boys want to be girls' nothing i look for has helped me understand this. Any ideas...

Gender dysphoria.

Go see your GP/physician and ask to be referred to a experienced psychologist/psychiatrist. Just explain the way you feel and your experiences.

linky

[edit on 28-12-2007 by melatonin]

My theory on this is basicly that due to interference with the human egg via IVF and embryo experimentation (which has been going on for alot longer than we have been led to belive) you are now getting children being born that are girls living inside the body of boys and vise verca. These people are commonly known as he/she's but it's not their fault.

You sound very normal to me. Does that make me weird?

I am a female and was raised the first 12 years of my life on a farm where I climbed trees and did all the boy things my brother did.

After I was 16 I got interested in cars and motorcycles. A well tuned engine was and still is music to my ears. I did my own normal tune ups and minor repair on my cars until I left home for college.

I was always a very feminine girl and enjoyed girlie things. But my love for boy activities never changed.

I am now 60 and have a motorcycle, truck and a boat, and a 4-wheeler. Love to go bogging and get muddy. However I still have this little female body that men still find attractive. I have a man and really don't like most women. I prefer the company of men and can hold my own in most male activities.

It would help if you had stated your age. If you are fairly young you may just need time to decide who you are. There is nothing wrong with being a "Tom Boy".

To thine own self be true is an old saying my dad always told me.

That was probably good advice for you to see a specialist concerning your feelings. My fear is that you would be prescribed medication and be given instructions on how to change yourself.

Being a woman and thinking like a man has taken me far in the business world. I retired this year and have everything I need or want.

BTW my man and I spent the day riding our 4-wheelers in the woods making new trails. He finds it exceptionally nice that we can enjoy manly activities together.

Like I said, you seem normal to me.

Originally posted by dizziedame
That was probably good advice for you to see a specialist concerning your feelings. My fear is that you would be prescribed medication and be given instructions on how to change yourself.

Shouldn't be something to fear.

If the individual is wanting to take that path in life, no great shakes. But it is true that it is often other people who tend to show the greatest anxiety with such issues.

A specialist is very unlikely to make rash decisions, such treatments are rarely given for the fun of it, but require detailed psychological assessment. Ultimately, it will always be the choice of the individual in consultation and guidance of an experienced professional, usually taken after much distress and never taken easily. The fact this person says it has 'been hard for some time' suggests it is more than just a 'tom-boy' situation.

Depression, anxiety, and self-harm are found in high levels in people with gender dysphoria. So, if the OPer feels significantly distressed by this, the best option is to seek some form of assessment, and to not worry about the fears of others. If it is just a minor passing concern or phase, then it is likely to pass with time or be noted during assessment.

Am I missing something? Did the OP say she self harmed? And I did say your advive for her to see a doctor was probably a good idea.

Not all specialist and doctors are equal. Over the past many years I have allowed doctors to turn my body toxic through medication they felt would cure my ills. Well they nearly cured me alright, I almost died.

The OP does need someone trained to talk with. Many times just talking will cause a person to find the answers to their questions. I've been in that situation many times.

I do fear the possibility of the OP not finding the best person to help her.

By the way,and this is off topic, I would sometime like to hear your views on melatonin as it must mean something to you as you are using it as your name. I am curious and have many questions.

On topic, you and I both seem to have the OP's best interest at heart.

[edit on 30-12-2007 by dizziedame]

Originally posted by dizziedame
Did the OP say she self harmed?

No, not at all. Just a fear of mine

The person comes over as gender dysphoric and it as been estimated that the incidence of suicide can be about 20+% in untreated people with gender identity disorder, this is especially true in the early stages while grappling with the issue.

By the way,and this is off topic, I would sometime like to hear your views on melatonin as it must mean something to you as you are using it as your name. I am curious and have many questions.

That's cool. No great meaning really, I study the brain and I like the name. Could have been 'serotonin', but I like the short-hand 'mel' better than 'sero'.

On topic, you and I both seem to have the OP's best interest at heart.

I think we probably do. The only issue I have is the implicit negative labelling of one successful treatment pathway for people with serious, distressing, and persistent gender dysphoria.

[edit on 31-12-2007 by melatonin]