this girl i like...

well there is this girl i like, she already has a boyfriend but here is our rather complicated history.

we both work at the same resturant and thats is how we came to know each other over the past 4-5 months. it all really started when i asked some girl out to homecoming with me, needless to say i was stood up but when this girl i like, whom i will call dana for organizational purposes, found out she said that she would've taken me in a heartbeat had she not gone with her boyfriend.

well also at my job i dont exactly have a car yet so i usually have a bit of a struggle finding a ride home and if i dont i just walk, but dana found out one night that i walked and insisted that she take me home, this continues to this day.

also i dont really have a very long history with the opposite sex, or barely at all for that matter, the entire extent of my love life was summed up to a single date whom never even bother to call me back. so when some of my friends at my job were joking that i need a girl to kiss me she volunteered and pecked me on the cheek. one time she was standing at the front desk with me and when i made a joking just gazed at me smiling for a while.

and finally recently there was a holiday party at my job, when she arrived and saw me there she kinda gave me a hug and layed her head on my shoulder for a few seconds, as the party progressed she proceeded to freak dance with me.

in conclusion i ask, does she actually like me or are we just very friendly?

She has a boyfriend. That is trouble.

In my jaded opinion as a board granny, she's playing with you and your feelings. Which is bad enough.

But if she's got a boyfriend, she should be off limits for you, by your own choice, just so that you can hold your head up and be the better man.

Some girls like the power of teasing like this, especially of guys without a lot of experience.

Let her be your friend; nothing wrong with that, but don't take it further unless she becomes single. Otherwise you'll be tangled up in a love triangle, which is not fun. Trust me on this.

You deserve to be involved with someone who is there for YOU without some other guy on the side.

Being the "other person" sucks. It's not a good place to be. You end up with no power and get jerked around by the person who's running between you and their original love interest.

And anyway, a person who will go out with two people, or even be involved with one person while teasing and leading a second one on, is not exactly emotionally mature or trustworthy.

It does appear that she really does like you, but maybe not quite enough to drop her current boyfriend. While us men usually like or dislike girls, girls have a huge variety of in-between settings. It's not that black and white for them.

Just remain friends with her for now and have fun just being yourself. If she drops hints about doing things together ouside of work, then you might be in luck. If not, you'll find someone else soon enough. I know it feels like "OMG! She's so awesome. Trust me when I say, this girl isn't the only one who will make you feel that way. Besides, you want someone who thinks the same about you.

What's better than going on a date with a girl you're crazy about? Going on a date with a girl that's crazy about you.

Trust me. There's no comparison.

Just be patient. Maybe this girl has a friend you'll eventually meet. Who knows? Girls like guys that have girls as friends. It shows you're normal, and trustworthy. So don't see this as just a negative. Just think of it as one more thing you're doing right to find the right girl.

[edit on 14-12-2007 by dbates]

Let nature take it's course and see what happens! At that age it's all a game. I'd say she kind of likes you, but she's also feeling you out to see if you like her.

Look for signs like....if she stands on a chair, and hikes her skirt up. If you can see garters, you're in. Get a frog to help your relationship evolve more quickly.



[edit on 14-12-2007 by dbates]

dbates!!! Those are some wonderful tips. Why didn't I think of that?

You should buy a frog!! Take that frog to work and stragetically place a chair near her...let that frog out of your pocket & see what happens

Is that a frog in your pocket or are you just glad to see me, eh jen.



Mysteri, heed the advice of these wise people!

I would offer something but my track record sucks so I'll just observe.

I'm always glad to see you whaaa...don't mind me, I'm just adjusting my knicker's

Surely you have some insightful advice to lend this young man from all your trips to Mexico?

Jen, I thought we agreed to leave my Mexico adventures alone.

Anyway, as dry as it is in Mexico, always take a raincoat.

And dating women with boyfriends or husbands never, ever, ever works out so that everyone is happy. Well, perhaps in some circles, but I don't have any first hand knowledge about that; or them!

Ill say this...only once
GET IN THERE MY SON!
its obvious she likes you, try talking to her about how she feels about her boyfriend ect. see how things are going on there, and if its not well, thats you que to chime in right there my son, you can do it, i belive in you (although i dont know you, your story made me like you) =D

prepare yourself to be hurt. badly. i have seen this happen many times, and i have done this many times ( yes, i admit it. ) she may like you, but if she still hasnt come to terms with herself on it, she prolly never will, and so nothing will happen with it. she might lead you on and then let you down. just ask her if she likes you. but beforehand, prepare yourself for a bruised and bleeding heart. good luck.

with all possible due respect in the most sincerest of terms, mentally i cannot forsee that occuring our relationship is just blossoming much too quickly for it to be anything else but i am not blind to the pain of emotional attachment i have experienced it several times in my short life