Hello,

For some time now I can hear these voices. It feels like most of the time I can't use my thinking/brain for myself. Almost like my attention is consumed against my will. But how to verify who the voices are? Whatever I ask I can't be sure who they are. How can I tell by voice alone wether or not they are telling the truth.

I can hear them constantly and sometimes it makes me physically nauseous. I can also hear this chirping sound in my ears, especially my right ear. My left ear is better but I still don't want to hear anything other but earthly sounds, the sounds from the dimension everyone hears. Instead a sound like the wind blowing or even metal like the heater or even the speakers (I was told by the voices to attach their sound to the speakers for example). Even trough metal pipes or the sound coming from the fan of my computer. I can even hear them through the sound of a car or bus humming of the motor. Sometimes I feel like I have pinpointed their identity but then I doubt myself wether "they" are not just keeping me busy, distracting me from grounding or shutting myself off to them.

I have several experiences where there is something like a human trying to get in my body but this has never worked. Some want to "take me over" and others just seem to want to talk.

Does anyone know what/who they are or could be? They don't leave when I ask them, at times when I resist most (when I truly don't want to hear them) I can hear loud bangs, sometimes accompanied by flashes of light. If there is one thing they can assume any identity since I cannot see them clearly. Sometimes I can see them walking about like a kind of blueish/white smoke, sometimes I can even feel them physically. If I am with other people I can usually shut myself off but even then I can hear them on the background.

I tried to make them shut up but they talk again as soon as I'm exhausted. I can place them outside of my body but I can't seem to close myself off. Anyone have any suggestions? I tried to talk to others but I don't know who I can talk to. I would like to ground and shut myself off for all these whatever they are but I can't seem to.

Thanks for responding. I have meditated for years (zazen, visualisations) which eventually lead me to a mind state of silence which at first was interesting (mushin). I'm not a buddhist, I study many different faiths. After years of having a thought train it is like I jumped off and there is no inner voice while I still am. But at some point other people or entities or whatever they are (there are many I have met, only a few seem to stay) began talking about a lot of things. Philoshopical subjects but also history, the human mind and how we came to be. But it only stays at that, talking even tough I don't want to talk to them. At this moment for example I know what I want to say here on this forum but those voices try to talk to me and have my attention even if it means saying the things I am typing (repeating me).

Most of the topics are about buddhism but when I really don't want to be with those people I try and change the subject, even if it means to imagining myself being in some far away jungle where nobody can find "me". Or trying to live in the moment and realize where I am physically. It is so difficult I have trouble painting my walls (I just bought a new apartement and still have many unpacked items). All in all I tried a lot even go to the police but then certain entities influence them (even a psychic), even my parents.

For example, one time I fled my daily routine and stayed in hotels just to get away from it all, then I come back and had to pick up the keys to my new apartement at my parent's house who helped me move (I stayed with them during moving). So I arrive at my parent's house, asking my keys back but they would not hand them to me. Then I demand them and they respond they'll call the police while having the house locked up with me inside. There was no violence for clarity. So they call the police and I do the same, the police arrives (after driving past my street and being confused where they should go). Then the police talks to me and my parents (this is only to get my keys to the apartement I bought with a mortgage) and I end up being arrested, taken to a police station and being locked up for a few hours. Had a talk with psychologists whom I managed to explain there is nothing wrong with me and eventually I get my keys back and I got back to my apartment. I have no prior records of any disfunctioning except these voices which draw my attention making it difficult for me to do what I want to do (which is get a life, socialize, study, work), but I try not to mention them (altough I now feel I am ready to talk about it with others via the internet anonymous as possible). I even quit my job trying to make a new start for myself and they wouldn't accept my resignation (while every other collegue that quit had no problems with). This is how bad it is for me.

[edit on 4-12-2007 by Abused]

[edit on 4-12-2007 by Abused]

[edit on 4-12-2007 by Abused]

Messy, indeed. Cut yourself off from USA to get yourself into an ashram or begin a strictly tibetan, tantric initiation.

Right ear is opened to immanental, horizontal and affective themas, and voices heard herein are rather positively incitative than anyhow condamning. Follow the path you've been looking for.