posted on Dec, 6 2007 @ 12:13 AM
I pray... maybe not as often as I should, but I do pray. And actually, I spend a great deal of time every day thinking about God and spiritual
matters, even if I am not "praying." I wouldn't call myself "religious" by any stretch of imagination, either.
My prayers have often been answered. I find that if I am praying for something to happen to/for me, I still have to put out a certain amount of
effort. After all, people say that God helps those that help themselves. But if I have prayed for someone to recover from an illness, for example, I
find that even if my prayer is not answered, I feel like I understand why it was not meant to be. That comforts me.
I knew an old Jewish lady, and when she died after a long illness, I helped go through her things to distribute them. She had no family, and I wanted
to help do that because I knew that I would be respectful, whereas I didn't know how other people would be. One of the things that I found was a
tablet of prayers that she had written. I was really amazed to read them. Not only were they so beautiful and personal, but they were for the most
basic things... For example, there was a prayer to say when using the restroom, thanking God that those bodily systems functioned, thus avoiding the
pain that might come if they did not function. That really got me thinking about all of the things that I could be talking to God about. I
found it all very interesting, and made me understand her a little bit better.
By the way, when I was little I said that prayer about "If I die before I wake..." My mom and I personalized it a bit, so that I was also praying
for specific people in my family. I never found it creepy, and wasn't ever scared by it. She taught it to me because I had terrible nightmares
(still do) almost every day. When I would wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare, I would say that prayer and it made me feel better.
The nightmares didn't stop, but I knew that nothing bad would really happen to me, because God was watching over me. I was never afraid of death,
even as a child, and still am not afraid of it. I know that makes me sound like I was a messed up little kid, but I have always been kind of
"casual" about death. It happens to everyone... no reason to fear it.