Thanksgiving Turkey!!!!!!!!!!

So I was sittin here doin' some thinkin'. So I says to myself, Self? I think I want a nice FRESH turkey for Thanksgivin' and stuff. Not one of those frozen ones.
So I went to the local farm and bought me a live turkey. Yeah! So like I let him out to run around in the backyard. Yep I was watchin that turkey.

That turkey thinks he's so cool. Walkin' around, peckin' at the ground, gobblin' and stuff. And like what's the deal with that long red thing on that turkeys face? I don't trust that turkey. When people aren't lookin', that turkey gives me dirty looks and stuff.
I hate that turkey.
I can't wait to cook his arse.

If your turkey starts coughing

It's fakin!

That bird flu is a turkey cop-out. It's an NWO conspiracy so all the turkeys can return to their home planet.

MonKey



[edit on 14/11/07 by ChiKeyMonKey]

I heard domestic turkeys were so stupid that they'd stand looking up into the rain until they drown. Maybe you can just give it a shower when it's time to go instead of something more ... drastic.

then it'll be clean already when you pluck it. Yeah, that's the ticket. Pre-showered turkey dinner.

a suggestion if I may:

If you are indeed going to cook a actual fresh turkey then here is a reccomendation that I learned from watching my dad with a goose that he shot. Strip off all the feathers that you can. Then in order to remove the pin feathers (the small fluffly ones) take some wax (my dad used blocks of Parafin) and melt them in a very large kettle of hot water. Dip the turkey in it, remove, let cool and peal off the parafin thus removing the pin feathers. I can't vouch for how effective this methods works. Judgeing from my dad's "colorful" language I'd say it was better than hand stripping but not perfect.